Talking With Grandpa
A sad situation72 total reviews
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
I enjoyed reading your poem about spending time with grandpa and grandchildrenbeing more interested in cellphones. --in your own unique style. You have a way with words that is captivating. Your writing flows naturally and it's easy to understand. Well done.
Gypsy
Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason.- Novalis
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I enjoyed reading your poem about spending time with grandpa and grandchildrenbeing more interested in cellphones. --in your own unique style. You have a way with words that is captivating. Your writing flows naturally and it's easy to understand. Well done.
Gypsy
Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason.- Novalis
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
Comment from Frank Malley
This very good center for an excellent poem might benefits from a few adjustments in its word choices and lines. Line 4 would be better 'Still, he ended up poor.' Verse 2 I would write 'His memory was very good/Things and people from the past/Some amusing, some confusing,/ without him they couldn't last. For line 10, I like 'Whom I'm lucky to now and then see' For 11 and 12, I like 'Tinkering with their stinking gadgets/ pocket buzzers stealing time from me' The last verse: I'm gonna say to them/ to keep a bit of the past/Park your beepin' gadgets/Hear me, read what some of what I wrote/
I should've rewritten the whole thing so that I could check the meter more effectively. I wasn't sure about these suggestions, and I probably need to spend more time on this set of lines, or write my own poem. I'm only making suggestions that might strengthen an excellent poem. MIGHT! Be well. Frank
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This very good center for an excellent poem might benefits from a few adjustments in its word choices and lines. Line 4 would be better 'Still, he ended up poor.' Verse 2 I would write 'His memory was very good/Things and people from the past/Some amusing, some confusing,/ without him they couldn't last. For line 10, I like 'Whom I'm lucky to now and then see' For 11 and 12, I like 'Tinkering with their stinking gadgets/ pocket buzzers stealing time from me' The last verse: I'm gonna say to them/ to keep a bit of the past/Park your beepin' gadgets/Hear me, read what some of what I wrote/
I should've rewritten the whole thing so that I could check the meter more effectively. I wasn't sure about these suggestions, and I probably need to spend more time on this set of lines, or write my own poem. I'm only making suggestions that might strengthen an excellent poem. MIGHT! Be well. Frank
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
Comment from Laurie Holding
This is adorable. And yes, back when we were kids, our grandparents WERE our gadgets! They had funny stories and did things with us our parents didn't or wouldn't. And our grandkids are glued to screens. They still love us, though, Jaybird, no worries on that count. And I'm fairly sure they listen better than we think they do.
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This is adorable. And yes, back when we were kids, our grandparents WERE our gadgets! They had funny stories and did things with us our parents didn't or wouldn't. And our grandkids are glued to screens. They still love us, though, Jaybird, no worries on that count. And I'm fairly sure they listen better than we think they do.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
Comment from Terry Broxson
LOL, I don't have any grandkids but for any kid to lay those gadgets down will not be easy. Your poem is well-written and the memories of your grandpa are good. I hope your grandkids come through for you. Terry.
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LOL, I don't have any grandkids but for any kid to lay those gadgets down will not be easy. Your poem is well-written and the memories of your grandpa are good. I hope your grandkids come through for you. Terry.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
Comment from LisaMay
Don't take it personally granddad - the young ones are ignoring their parents as well, with noses stuck in their gadgets. It's nice to know you had a good relationship with your own grandfather.
Corrections:
Gosh,(add space here)I loved to talk with Grandpa
Some amusing, some confusing, (lower case for 'some' because it follows a semicolon not a full stop)
Spelling should be gadgets not gadjets throughout.
in this oldtimers boat (add possessive apostrophe - oldtimer's)
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Don't take it personally granddad - the young ones are ignoring their parents as well, with noses stuck in their gadgets. It's nice to know you had a good relationship with your own grandfather.
Corrections:
Gosh,(add space here)I loved to talk with Grandpa
Some amusing, some confusing, (lower case for 'some' because it follows a semicolon not a full stop)
Spelling should be gadgets not gadjets throughout.
in this oldtimers boat (add possessive apostrophe - oldtimer's)
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
Comment from Aussie
Gadjets (gagets) hello and thank you for the great poem, appreciated by us elders. Grandfathers play a great role (or used to) in the upbringing of grandchildren. Kids these days are not like we were; respectful, interested in your conversation etc. I find a child who is a stranger will listen in awe more than your own. K XX
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Gadjets (gagets) hello and thank you for the great poem, appreciated by us elders. Grandfathers play a great role (or used to) in the upbringing of grandchildren. Kids these days are not like we were; respectful, interested in your conversation etc. I find a child who is a stranger will listen in awe more than your own. K XX
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
Comment from Gloria ....
So much truth here, Jay. If one wants to communicate with their grands, a little technology/gadgets, is often required.
Although I am with you, going on a boat with a grandfather might be a great way to share of oneself.
As always a fine poem from you and many thanks for sharing. :))
Gloria
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So much truth here, Jay. If one wants to communicate with their grands, a little technology/gadgets, is often required.
Although I am with you, going on a boat with a grandfather might be a great way to share of oneself.
As always a fine poem from you and many thanks for sharing. :))
Gloria
Comment Written 15-Jun-2022
Comment from Frances Jean
Well written once again my friend. How true about the young ones of today. Our grandies are so busy playing this and that on their Ipads, gaming rooms and phones and our kids are too busy with work and their gadgets! It's hard to get them interact. Nice end rhyming and great content. Take care Franky
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Well written once again my friend. How true about the young ones of today. Our grandies are so busy playing this and that on their Ipads, gaming rooms and phones and our kids are too busy with work and their gadgets! It's hard to get them interact. Nice end rhyming and great content. Take care Franky
Comment Written 14-Jun-2022
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Your note and poem are appreciated, jaybird.
-You wrote a good poem about being a
grandfather in your father's generation and yours.
-I remember visiting my grandparents and the
different things they would share. They also had
a sense of humor.
-I'm always sorry to read that you have a lot of family,
but they don't bother to visit. I think they are lucky to have you.
-Maybe you could send each of them this poem and rock their boat:)
-Well done. Have a good evening and week ahead.
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-Your note and poem are appreciated, jaybird.
-You wrote a good poem about being a
grandfather in your father's generation and yours.
-I remember visiting my grandparents and the
different things they would share. They also had
a sense of humor.
-I'm always sorry to read that you have a lot of family,
but they don't bother to visit. I think they are lucky to have you.
-Maybe you could send each of them this poem and rock their boat:)
-Well done. Have a good evening and week ahead.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2022
Comment from Katie Mae Dead
I feel your pain jaybird. I'm a boomer and get no respect from Gen x-ers and Millennials.
I love the easy flow of this like the simplicity of the grandpa's time
Your ending is spectacular!
Much enjoyed
Katiemae
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I feel your pain jaybird. I'm a boomer and get no respect from Gen x-ers and Millennials.
I love the easy flow of this like the simplicity of the grandpa's time
Your ending is spectacular!
Much enjoyed
Katiemae
Comment Written 14-Jun-2022
