Backup
Capital Punishment19 total reviews
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
Come on, now that is funny I don't care who you are.
I have a twisted sense of humor too at times. I like that in a person. I was expecting to see the warden say, tomorrow is another day, but you surprised me, I like that good work. Karen
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
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Come on, now that is funny I don't care who you are.
I have a twisted sense of humor too at times. I like that in a person. I was expecting to see the warden say, tomorrow is another day, but you surprised me, I like that good work. Karen
Comment Written 01-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2023
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Thanks for the review, Karen. You had to dig deep in the archives for that one.
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I like to see what someone was like at the start. I also look for things that need a few more stars to make it over the hump. Gives me a feeling of power!hahaha Karen
Comment from Spitfire
Good entry. Nice listing of all the things that need to be in place for the execution. Poor prisoner thinks he might get a reprieve, but trust the state to have a backup in place.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2022
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Good entry. Nice listing of all the things that need to be in place for the execution. Poor prisoner thinks he might get a reprieve, but trust the state to have a backup in place.
Comment Written 07-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2022
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Thanks, Spitfire. Hope you are feeling better.
Comment from Sugarray77
Your short dribble is packed with motion, energy and tension. Great job on the structure and plot... and the closing dialogue with Sam is a real 'kicker'. Good luck.
Melissa
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2022
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Your short dribble is packed with motion, energy and tension. Great job on the structure and plot... and the closing dialogue with Sam is a real 'kicker'. Good luck.
Melissa
Comment Written 05-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2022
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Thanks, Melissa. I'm looking forward to this relationship.
Comment from Carolyn Dooley
So he gets fried anyway? He was prepped. This is like Russian Roulette. It was obviously meant for him to die. Whether he was guilty or innocent. He did not have good luck. Several innocent people have been electrocuted.
If the guy was innocent, it would be a shame. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
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So he gets fried anyway? He was prepped. This is like Russian Roulette. It was obviously meant for him to die. Whether he was guilty or innocent. He did not have good luck. Several innocent people have been electrocuted.
If the guy was innocent, it would be a shame. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
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Thanks, Carolyn. If it will make you feel any better, he was guilty.
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Yes, it does.
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
I am confused, what is a Drabble? Whatever it is, this one is quite strong in the message. I thought it was quite powerful the way the beginning introduced it - I certainly thought the man was in jail.
Paul, you will not hear from me again. I will be resigning because my MS has progressed to the point where I can't work any more, thanks for our past association however brief, Giddy
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
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I am confused, what is a Drabble? Whatever it is, this one is quite strong in the message. I thought it was quite powerful the way the beginning introduced it - I certainly thought the man was in jail.
Paul, you will not hear from me again. I will be resigning because my MS has progressed to the point where I can't work any more, thanks for our past association however brief, Giddy
Comment Written 03-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
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I will miss you Giddy. I wish you the best, and I will say a prayer for you.
Comment from LJbutterfly
Oh Nooo! Not the backup generator! This is imaginative and captivating. Rather than a smoothly flowing story, you use short, choppy, powerfully visual words that generate a feeling of urgency. By the time the reader processes what is taking place, it's time to flip the switch for the backup generator. I think this is a phenomenal dribble flash. Best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2022
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Oh Nooo! Not the backup generator! This is imaginative and captivating. Rather than a smoothly flowing story, you use short, choppy, powerfully visual words that generate a feeling of urgency. By the time the reader processes what is taking place, it's time to flip the switch for the backup generator. I think this is a phenomenal dribble flash. Best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2022
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Thanks, LJ. Had to resort to trickery to get the word count.
Comment from royowen
Hah hah, I hope the back up has the power...this is hilarious, and very witty, it's the ultimate irony, just when you think you've escaped...zap. An excellent post my friend, good luck, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2022
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Hah hah, I hope the back up has the power...this is hilarious, and very witty, it's the ultimate irony, just when you think you've escaped...zap. An excellent post my friend, good luck, blessings Roy
Comment Written 02-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2022
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Thanks, Roy. I wonder if they will ever have battery operated electric chairs.
Comment from JoannaN
This is scary. The picture you have chosen complements your story well. Your flash fiction is dynamic. The writing style (short sentences, few verbs) makes it more distant and thus more touching.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2022
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This is scary. The picture you have chosen complements your story well. Your flash fiction is dynamic. The writing style (short sentences, few verbs) makes it more distant and thus more touching.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2022
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Thanks, Joanna. With so few words, I had to resort to trickery.
Comment from Dawn Munro
OH! (*gulp*) What a serious punch to the gut, that ending -- perfect for a dribble too. With so few words you lead us into the chamber to watch in horror, and then you have your reader assume the protagonist's place...
I must say, for any reader with a vivid imagination, this evokes some awful reflex action... For that alone, I am awarding the extra star. (I did NOT enjoy this -- lol.) But it is outstanding writing.
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2022
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OH! (*gulp*) What a serious punch to the gut, that ending -- perfect for a dribble too. With so few words you lead us into the chamber to watch in horror, and then you have your reader assume the protagonist's place...
I must say, for any reader with a vivid imagination, this evokes some awful reflex action... For that alone, I am awarding the extra star. (I did NOT enjoy this -- lol.) But it is outstanding writing.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2022
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Thanks, Dawn. Sorry about the punch. Hope you are all right.
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:) Ginger ale. I'm drinking ginger ale and putting it out of my mind. (Hahahaha!)
Comment from Wayne Fowler
I like it. Good work.
Never mind positions on the death penalty. It's good writing.
Cute picture, too.
The staccato, sentence fragments have their place. Don't you just hate (too strong, I know) when reviewers tell you that you've left out a sentence structure element when you've done it for effect?
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2022
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I like it. Good work.
Never mind positions on the death penalty. It's good writing.
Cute picture, too.
The staccato, sentence fragments have their place. Don't you just hate (too strong, I know) when reviewers tell you that you've left out a sentence structure element when you've done it for effect?
Best wishes.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2022
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Thanks, Wayne. When there is such a short word count, sometimes the sentence structure will suffer.
