Skies of Sun and Rain
Activity8 total reviews
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
Spider on the tree trunk
Gets a tan as he spins
Spider webs are fascinating because they are beautiful and serve many purposes. Not all webs are used to catch prey and some spiders do not build webs of any kind.
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Spider on the tree trunk
Gets a tan as he spins
Spider webs are fascinating because they are beautiful and serve many purposes. Not all webs are used to catch prey and some spiders do not build webs of any kind.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2022
Comment from C.A.Currie
Nice rhyming. Complete story, too. Well done. The only thing I might suggest is the line: 'gets a tan as he spins'. As much as I love this playful image, the line sounds a little forced and the picture you have painted, up to and beyond this point is one of dusk/early evening. I think now he might glisten more than tan. He probably tans better in full sunlight. LOL And glisten seems to flow more smoothly.
Now please know that this is just my humble opinion, and in my heart of hearts, I just want to help you to make your poem be its very best. That said, none of us are perfect LOL ESPECIALLY ME!
Hugs & Sunshine from my heart to yours.
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Nice rhyming. Complete story, too. Well done. The only thing I might suggest is the line: 'gets a tan as he spins'. As much as I love this playful image, the line sounds a little forced and the picture you have painted, up to and beyond this point is one of dusk/early evening. I think now he might glisten more than tan. He probably tans better in full sunlight. LOL And glisten seems to flow more smoothly.
Now please know that this is just my humble opinion, and in my heart of hearts, I just want to help you to make your poem be its very best. That said, none of us are perfect LOL ESPECIALLY ME!
Hugs & Sunshine from my heart to yours.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2022
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent entry for the Use These Words writing prompt contest.
Good poem with a great presentation and imagery. It flows well with descriptive words that paint a clear poetic vision..
Gypsy Blue Rose
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus
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Excellent entry for the Use These Words writing prompt contest.
Good poem with a great presentation and imagery. It flows well with descriptive words that paint a clear poetic vision..
Gypsy Blue Rose
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus
Comment Written 01-Jun-2022
Comment from Iza Deleanu
I love the last stanza almost as a haiku - Water from the Heavens
Dark clouds are rolling in
Sun turns into rainy night
Moon's shift will soon begin- thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.
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I love the last stanza almost as a haiku - Water from the Heavens
Dark clouds are rolling in
Sun turns into rainy night
Moon's shift will soon begin- thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2022
Comment from the13thpoet
Hello mystery writer a good day to you, I hope this finds you well. I liked your use these words contest entry, you executed it well. Good usage of the required words. Good job and good luck in the contest.
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Hello mystery writer a good day to you, I hope this finds you well. I liked your use these words contest entry, you executed it well. Good usage of the required words. Good job and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2022
Comment from jessizero
You painted a pretty picture with your words and the words supplied by the prompt. I also loved the image you selected to accompany your poem. Thanks for sharing!
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You painted a pretty picture with your words and the words supplied by the prompt. I also loved the image you selected to accompany your poem. Thanks for sharing!
Comment Written 31-May-2022
Comment from AnnieDawn
I like the way you have written this post and did find all of the required words in it. It was enjoyable to read and was smooth through most of the poem. There are a couple of lines that could be worked on to get the rhythm to work. All in all a good read and good luck in the contest.
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I like the way you have written this post and did find all of the required words in it. It was enjoyable to read and was smooth through most of the poem. There are a couple of lines that could be worked on to get the rhythm to work. All in all a good read and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 31-May-2022
Comment from John Ciarmello
This is a perfect contest entry. I don't know where the contest stands, but this is a contender. I wish you much success with the contest. Best, JohnC
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This is a perfect contest entry. I don't know where the contest stands, but this is a contender. I wish you much success with the contest. Best, JohnC
Comment Written 31-May-2022
