Lakeside Haven
picture this club post26 total reviews
Comment from karenina
I found the universal concept of nature to be most effective!
You do not direct our focus to a chirping bird, or a rustling of trees.
There are times when I'm awe, I focus on the entire experience!
"Myriad of sights and sounds" graces me with the ability to draw from my own love affair with nature...
Like you, being at a lake or on the sea shore submitted me in serenity!
Much enjoyed!
Karenina
reply by the author on 29-May-2022
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I found the universal concept of nature to be most effective!
You do not direct our focus to a chirping bird, or a rustling of trees.
There are times when I'm awe, I focus on the entire experience!
"Myriad of sights and sounds" graces me with the ability to draw from my own love affair with nature...
Like you, being at a lake or on the sea shore submitted me in serenity!
Much enjoyed!
Karenina
Comment Written 28-May-2022
reply by the author on 29-May-2022
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Thanks for your continuing support, Karenina. I am glad you liked it.
Joan
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I truly did!
Comment from rspoet
Hello Joan,
This is an excellent short poem for the Picture This club
with very good use of alliteration with the "d" and "s" words.
The picture shows the beauty of dawn and the poem matches it.
Nicely done.
Best wishes.
Robert
reply by the author on 29-May-2022
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Hello Joan,
This is an excellent short poem for the Picture This club
with very good use of alliteration with the "d" and "s" words.
The picture shows the beauty of dawn and the poem matches it.
Nicely done.
Best wishes.
Robert
Comment Written 28-May-2022
reply by the author on 29-May-2022
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Robert,
Thanks for your kind words and high rating. Both are much appreciated.
Joan
Comment from K. Lang-Slattery
This is a lovely poem. Though you manage to convey an idea in a very limited number of words, I think it lacks any real descriptive phrase that catches the essence of nature. Maybe I'm asking too much, but I long for at least one turn of phrase that contains some kind of imagery. This would make the poem special.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 28-May-2022
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This is a lovely poem. Though you manage to convey an idea in a very limited number of words, I think it lacks any real descriptive phrase that catches the essence of nature. Maybe I'm asking too much, but I long for at least one turn of phrase that contains some kind of imagery. This would make the poem special.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 28-May-2022
reply by the author on 28-May-2022
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Thanks for the constructive criticism
dp
Comment from Sally Law
Loving this, dear Joan. Beautifully penned and illustrated in short verse poetry. A sweet memory between a parent and child. Sending you my best today as always, and my very best wishes for the writing challenge,
Sal XOs
reply by the author on 28-May-2022
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Loving this, dear Joan. Beautifully penned and illustrated in short verse poetry. A sweet memory between a parent and child. Sending you my best today as always, and my very best wishes for the writing challenge,
Sal XOs
Comment Written 28-May-2022
reply by the author on 28-May-2022
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Hi Sally,
Thanks for both this nicce review and the best wishes.
Joan
Comment from lyenochka
I agree that there's something soothing about being by water. I don't know when you posted because I didn't get notified of this one.
Enjoyed the cinquain-like feel of the poem enjoying the beautiful sights and sounds of nature.
reply by the author on 28-May-2022
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I agree that there's something soothing about being by water. I don't know when you posted because I didn't get notified of this one.
Enjoyed the cinquain-like feel of the poem enjoying the beautiful sights and sounds of nature.
Comment Written 28-May-2022
reply by the author on 28-May-2022
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Thanks for the review. Yes, I wanted it to feel like a cinquain.
Joan
Comment from Raul1
The sentences flow with clarity. It is interesting and entertaining to read. I like how you structured this poem. Excellent work! No grammatical errors. Good job! Thank you for sharing!
reply by the author on 28-May-2022
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The sentences flow with clarity. It is interesting and entertaining to read. I like how you structured this poem. Excellent work! No grammatical errors. Good job! Thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 27-May-2022
reply by the author on 28-May-2022
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Hi Raul,
Thanks for the short but thorough review. I am glad you liked the structure.
Joan
Comment from harmony13
The author's words are engaging, lovely, descriptive and creative. I
pondered on these words and yes a nature based place like this is a gift!
The poem flows and connects well. The artwork is awesome.
Have a great weekend!....Maria
reply by the author on 27-May-2022
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The author's words are engaging, lovely, descriptive and creative. I
pondered on these words and yes a nature based place like this is a gift!
The poem flows and connects well. The artwork is awesome.
Have a great weekend!....Maria
Comment Written 27-May-2022
reply by the author on 27-May-2022
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Thank you for your kind words, Maria.
Joan
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent entry for the picture this club. Nice imagery and presentation. The syntax is a bit of. I don't know if you are supposed to follow a specific syllables count. You have 2/3/4/7/2
I have a suggestion of 5/4/6/4 syllables count.
beautiful nature
from dawn till dusk
with a Myriad gifts
of sights and sounds
New
reply by the author on 27-May-2022
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Excellent entry for the picture this club. Nice imagery and presentation. The syntax is a bit of. I don't know if you are supposed to follow a specific syllables count. You have 2/3/4/7/2
I have a suggestion of 5/4/6/4 syllables count.
beautiful nature
from dawn till dusk
with a Myriad gifts
of sights and sounds
New
Comment Written 27-May-2022
reply by the author on 27-May-2022
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Thanks for readining and reviewing this poem, Gypsy. I will think about your rewrite.
Joan
Comment from C.A.Currie
Yes, the poem and the picture are perfect matches. Nice writing - getting so much said in so few words. I personally find that very difficult to do. Kudos to you! Thanks for sharing! Hugs & sunshine from my heart to yours. ~ Christine ~
reply by the author on 27-May-2022
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Yes, the poem and the picture are perfect matches. Nice writing - getting so much said in so few words. I personally find that very difficult to do. Kudos to you! Thanks for sharing! Hugs & sunshine from my heart to yours. ~ Christine ~
Comment Written 27-May-2022
reply by the author on 27-May-2022
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Christine,
Thanks for your encouraging words and all the stars.
Joan
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Water can be very peaceful, and
this image is a good one to write about, Joan.
-You did a good job with your poem.
-Effective imagery and good adjectives
at the beginning that set the scene.
-A very good pivot line with "dawn to dusk."
-Very good concluding lines showing how
nature presents her gifts.
-Well done.
reply by the author on 27-May-2022
|
-Water can be very peaceful, and
this image is a good one to write about, Joan.
-You did a good job with your poem.
-Effective imagery and good adjectives
at the beginning that set the scene.
-A very good pivot line with "dawn to dusk."
-Very good concluding lines showing how
nature presents her gifts.
-Well done.
Comment Written 27-May-2022
reply by the author on 27-May-2022
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Thanks for the concise and thorough review, Pam.
Joan
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You are very welcome, Joan.
