The Last Time I Saw Charlie
Fiction story of a coal miner5 total reviews
Comment from Rena Smith
This is a really good story and true to life. I also love a story that is happy but for some reason I love a good story that's a tear-jerker also. However, I really hope that Charlie got out of that mine. I really enjoyed reading this story because it was a very interesting story and a good tear-jerker.
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This is a really good story and true to life. I also love a story that is happy but for some reason I love a good story that's a tear-jerker also. However, I really hope that Charlie got out of that mine. I really enjoyed reading this story because it was a very interesting story and a good tear-jerker.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
Comment from wilkswrites
You did a good job describing Charlie, so much so that I feel Like I knew him too. What a sad story. I imagined him stuck in the darkness, coughing, and struggling to breathe. I am so sorry that he was never seen again (assuming that this is a true story). Great job!
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You did a good job describing Charlie, so much so that I feel Like I knew him too. What a sad story. I imagined him stuck in the darkness, coughing, and struggling to breathe. I am so sorry that he was never seen again (assuming that this is a true story). Great job!
Comment Written 26-Feb-2022
Comment from zanya
An evocative and thought- provoking tale of life and how it is lived from the point of view of a man working in a coal mine -the daily grind, one might say
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An evocative and thought- provoking tale of life and how it is lived from the point of view of a man working in a coal mine -the daily grind, one might say
Comment Written 25-Feb-2022
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Your contest entry reads well with great imagery, Mystery Author. I enjoyed reading it, though it is poignant. You described Charlie well--a man married to his job. The ending makes me think he died in the mines--maybe became trapped during an explosion, or he died of black lung disease.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
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Your contest entry reads well with great imagery, Mystery Author. I enjoyed reading it, though it is poignant. You described Charlie well--a man married to his job. The ending makes me think he died in the mines--maybe became trapped during an explosion, or he died of black lung disease.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 24-Feb-2022
Comment from lancellot
Hmm, this is interesting. I do worry about the story itself. We know Charlie worked his life in the mines, and that seems to be all he did, day in and day out. Before the end, we are told he was a caring friend, but that is never shown to us in the story. Actually, we don't know why we are being told about Charlie and his stagnant life.
I think this could benefit with more content and context. With a story and premise or plot in mind. What is the message the reader is to learn?
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Hmm, this is interesting. I do worry about the story itself. We know Charlie worked his life in the mines, and that seems to be all he did, day in and day out. Before the end, we are told he was a caring friend, but that is never shown to us in the story. Actually, we don't know why we are being told about Charlie and his stagnant life.
I think this could benefit with more content and context. With a story and premise or plot in mind. What is the message the reader is to learn?
Comment Written 24-Feb-2022
