Anzac Day Parade
Parade Poem6 total reviews
Comment from Gloria ....
Great job here, Wils. This is a finely written poem about a parade on Anzac Day. Great imagery and rhyme.
Just one thing I noted here on line four:
It stretches into two lines, but it is an easy repair by changing people watching to people watch. Or perhaps you are using Classic FanStory in which case it would fit.
Great job with this and best of luck to you with the voters. :))
Gloria
reply by the author on 13-Feb-2022
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Great job here, Wils. This is a finely written poem about a parade on Anzac Day. Great imagery and rhyme.
Just one thing I noted here on line four:
It stretches into two lines, but it is an easy repair by changing people watching to people watch. Or perhaps you are using Classic FanStory in which case it would fit.
Great job with this and best of luck to you with the voters. :))
Gloria
Comment Written 13-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 13-Feb-2022
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Thanks for your review Gloria. I have made the suggested change. As I now live in the US I miss the Anzac celebration.
Geoff
Comment from LisaMay
Nice poem you've penned honouring the Anzacs, but you are going to have to do some serious pruning! The contest states entries should be 5 lines in total. Now there's s challenge for you! I think there's quite a few hours left until time is up, so get cracking and keep an Aussie presence in the contest.
I was thinking of entering a NZ-themed one but I've already posted 2 items and cannot post another in the time frame for this contest.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2022
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Nice poem you've penned honouring the Anzacs, but you are going to have to do some serious pruning! The contest states entries should be 5 lines in total. Now there's s challenge for you! I think there's quite a few hours left until time is up, so get cracking and keep an Aussie presence in the contest.
I was thinking of entering a NZ-themed one but I've already posted 2 items and cannot post another in the time frame for this contest.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2022
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Thank you Lisa. I won?t bore you with the four letter words that came out of my mouth after reading your review. Note to self: Read the Rules Geoffrey!!!
Geoff
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I've done it myself. It definitely induces the uttering of obscenities.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A fine tribute to Aussie's Anzac day as homage is paid to those who survived and those who lost their life in war. A fine poem for the contest, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2022
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A fine tribute to Aussie's Anzac day as homage is paid to those who survived and those who lost their life in war. A fine poem for the contest, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 12-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2022
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Thanks for your review. I've just been told it needs serious cutting before it can be entered. Glad you enjoyed it as it was.
Geoff
Comment from Paul McFarland
Very good patriotic poem. I saw the movie about Gallipoli. It was a very moving film. It bothered me quite a bit. I have written a few patriotic poems.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2022
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Very good patriotic poem. I saw the movie about Gallipoli. It was a very moving film. It bothered me quite a bit. I have written a few patriotic poems.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2022
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Thanks for your review Paul. I wasn't sure if the movie did well in the States or not.
Geoff
Comment from Susan Newell
Wils,
This is a great entry for the contest. I learned about Anzac Day here on FanStory. Your poem rhymes nicely, reads easily and delivers a strong message. Mel Gibson's movie made me aware of what happened at Gallipoli. Nicely done.
Sue
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2022
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Wils,
This is a great entry for the contest. I learned about Anzac Day here on FanStory. Your poem rhymes nicely, reads easily and delivers a strong message. Mel Gibson's movie made me aware of what happened at Gallipoli. Nicely done.
Sue
Comment Written 11-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2022
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Thanks for your review Sue. I've heard the movie only glosses over what actually happened. So many so tragically killed.
Geoff
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Geoff,
You are welcome. They can put only so much into a couple hours, but the message came through loud and clear.
Sue
Comment from lancellot
This is very nice. I like the alternating rhyme used in the second and third stanzas. With that in mind, I would advise a closer look at the rhymes in the first stanza. Line two and line four. If they were not meant to rhyme then disregard.
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This is very nice. I like the alternating rhyme used in the second and third stanzas. With that in mind, I would advise a closer look at the rhymes in the first stanza. Line two and line four. If they were not meant to rhyme then disregard.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2022
