Family Justice
A Talk With An Angel17 total reviews
Comment from Carol Clark2
You're certainly a great story teller! This has so many characters. I like that Jason is telling the story, and is willing to accept the punishment for something he did not do. A great example of love for his family. Blessings. Carol
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2022
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You're certainly a great story teller! This has so many characters. I like that Jason is telling the story, and is willing to accept the punishment for something he did not do. A great example of love for his family. Blessings. Carol
Comment Written 18-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2022
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thank you for the great review and kindness. I guess Jason knew he'd had opportunities to change the course of his family's life and didn't now was his last chance and he took it, hoping God would understand.
Hugs, Carol
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I really liked the complexity of this story, with all its characters. You kept me wondering till the end.
Comment from Wendy G
An excellent story, and it maintained the interest through to the end. He may have made some bad choices, but he was willing to take the punishment for his grandson - a beautiful example of love.
Wendy
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2022
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An excellent story, and it maintained the interest through to the end. He may have made some bad choices, but he was willing to take the punishment for his grandson - a beautiful example of love.
Wendy
Comment Written 18-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2022
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And his granddaughter. I guess I was too subtle in my writing. Leroy was shot in the back...not facing Jackson. Annie ran and dropped her blanket and the gun in the weeds which Jason saw and hid. Thanks for the kindness and review. Always appreciated.
Hugs, Carol
Comment from Anne Johnston
Your story is very well written, flows freely, and is easy to read. You know how to hold the reader's attention right through to the end. Interesting ending, and so timely.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2022
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Your story is very well written, flows freely, and is easy to read. You know how to hold the reader's attention right through to the end. Interesting ending, and so timely.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2022
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Thanks for your kindness and the review. I wanted to show that Jason understood he hadn't taken the right roads for his family but he had one chance to set them on the right path.
Hugs, CArol
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You are welcome
Comment from BethShelby
This is an excellent story. It is late and I know I'm missing something but I'm not sure who actually killed Leroy. I understand why Jason wants to take the blame for his son's death. He is dying anyway and he wants to protect someone. It sounds like he is protecting Mandy, but does she have a gun, His grandson Jackson was holding a guy which he says he tried to fire. Caleb takes him fishing to get the ten year old out of the scene and Jason lies for them. Then we see Jason drop a doll blanket in the cistern. Surely in wasn't Anne. Why were there two guns and who killed Leroy?
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2022
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This is an excellent story. It is late and I know I'm missing something but I'm not sure who actually killed Leroy. I understand why Jason wants to take the blame for his son's death. He is dying anyway and he wants to protect someone. It sounds like he is protecting Mandy, but does she have a gun, His grandson Jackson was holding a guy which he says he tried to fire. Caleb takes him fishing to get the ten year old out of the scene and Jason lies for them. Then we see Jason drop a doll blanket in the cistern. Surely in wasn't Anne. Why were there two guns and who killed Leroy?
Comment Written 18-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2022
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It wasn't Jackson because his gun jammed and he was facing his father, but Jason knew his grandson would be the first to be blamed. The Sheriff knew it wasn't Jason or Jackson because Leroy was shot in the back. Annie ran to the woods and dropped her blanket and the gun. A secret Jason intended to keep. Sorry it was confusing.
Hugs, CArol
Comment from royowen
I'm sounds like Jason is half way between heaven and earth, unreality to reality, hell bound but yet a hand is upholding him. The contact with people in his life Is like a dreamworld, the characters influential in his life are seemingly Roget, well done Carol, blessings Roy
Typo : By the time in (drug) myself. Dragged? Sounds like he's drugging himself Carol.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2022
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I'm sounds like Jason is half way between heaven and earth, unreality to reality, hell bound but yet a hand is upholding him. The contact with people in his life Is like a dreamworld, the characters influential in his life are seemingly Roget, well done Carol, blessings Roy
Typo : By the time in (drug) myself. Dragged? Sounds like he's drugging himself Carol.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2022
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I think Jason is like many of us torn between the knowledge of what he wanted to be and how his life turned out. In the end, he would save his family regardless of what it would do to him. Sometimes we just have to learn to let go.
Hugs, CArol
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Me too Carol
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This is a fine story, and I raced as I read, to keep pace with the dancing words. One thing disturbed me and seriously disrupted the flow. The incorrect and inconsistent use of speech commas.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2022
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This is a fine story, and I raced as I read, to keep pace with the dancing words. One thing disturbed me and seriously disrupted the flow. The incorrect and inconsistent use of speech commas.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2022
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I am so sorry about the commas, Katherine. i used Grammarly and prowriting and did as they suggested. I will take another look and see what I did wrong. Thanks for pointing it out to me.
Always, Carol
Comment from Theodore McDowell
You are one of the best storytellers on this site, bar none. You paint such a vivid picture I felt as if I was on the porch with the man. I loved being able to get inside his head and listen to his story.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2022
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You are one of the best storytellers on this site, bar none. You paint such a vivid picture I felt as if I was on the porch with the man. I loved being able to get inside his head and listen to his story.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2022
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You have no idea how much your review meant to me. I am struggling with some things at the moment and doubted myself. Thank you so much for the kindness you've share with me.
Hugs, Carol
