First Snow
Haiku Poem35 total reviews
Comment from SimianSavant
That song is one of the best in the repertoire, and if you ever manage to see the Broadway show, they somehow made the arrangement even better. As to your poem -- very evocative and picturesque, perfectly capturing and reframing the image of seasonal destruction into something of beauty. The chosen image works pretty well with it. I suppose you could go for something more literal (snow on actual leaves) but maybe that is best left to the imagination of the reader : )
Thank you for the great read!
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2021
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That song is one of the best in the repertoire, and if you ever manage to see the Broadway show, they somehow made the arrangement even better. As to your poem -- very evocative and picturesque, perfectly capturing and reframing the image of seasonal destruction into something of beauty. The chosen image works pretty well with it. I suppose you could go for something more literal (snow on actual leaves) but maybe that is best left to the imagination of the reader : )
Thank you for the great read!
Comment Written 19-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2021
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Thank you for the lovely review and generous compliments. I'm so glad you enjoyed my Haiku. Sending you my best today as always,
Sally :))
Comment from Jeff Watkins
Sally, congratulations!! The poem, the winter scene, and the film collectively anchor me in a reality or world that seems solid, reliable, safe, joyful and decent. Remembering and cherishing this world is like taking a shower to wash off the shit shower of the modern world. Jeff
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2021
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Sally, congratulations!! The poem, the winter scene, and the film collectively anchor me in a reality or world that seems solid, reliable, safe, joyful and decent. Remembering and cherishing this world is like taking a shower to wash off the shit shower of the modern world. Jeff
Comment Written 19-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2021
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Thank you for the wonderful review and kind stars, Jeff. I am so glad your felt washed and encouraged by my winter haiku! The Irving Berlin song is super sweet and I just had to include it. Sending you my best and blessings always,
Sally :))
Comment from Tina Crute
How lovely this is! I have been gone and missed this kind of special magic you do with words. You placed me there in the snow, admiring the beauty. Love ' Winter's breath.'
Best to you!
Tina
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2021
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How lovely this is! I have been gone and missed this kind of special magic you do with words. You placed me there in the snow, admiring the beauty. Love ' Winter's breath.'
Best to you!
Tina
Comment Written 17-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2021
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Aw, Tina!! Christmas has come early! You are worth more than six stars!! Did good to see you. Thank you for stopping by and the generous gift. Blessings always,
Sally XOs...xo...
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Hi, Sally! Aw, you're so sweet! I hope you're doing well! I missed you! I've been writing devotions for my church's website every day I will stop doing that soon as I miss doing other things, like this! Hugs!
Tina
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Sounds wonderful. Blessings!! Sal XOs
Comment from dragonpoet
Sally,
This haiku gives a strong image of a first snow that covers the leaves and tells us Autumn is over and Winter has come. It has good use of personification and metaphor.
Congrats for the honorable mention in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2021
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Sally,
This haiku gives a strong image of a first snow that covers the leaves and tells us Autumn is over and Winter has come. It has good use of personification and metaphor.
Congrats for the honorable mention in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 17-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2021
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Thank you very much for the lovely review of my haiku. I?m so glad you enjoyed it. Sending along my very best to you and yours as always, Sally XOs
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My pleasure, Sally
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Joan
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Sally--congrats on your prize for this fresh and elegant haiku--with a charming touch of whimsy as to white frosting and winter's breath. Glad I caught up to this. Cheers. LIZ
reply by the author on 16-Nov-2021
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Sally--congrats on your prize for this fresh and elegant haiku--with a charming touch of whimsy as to white frosting and winter's breath. Glad I caught up to this. Cheers. LIZ
Comment Written 16-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 16-Nov-2021
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Thank you very much for the lovely review of my poem. I was so flabbergasted that I actually won something. Sending you my best today as always,
Sal XOs
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Sally,
I've always compared the seasons to the stages of life. I link Spring with kids... toddlers through to graduation from Grade 12. It's a time for discovery and learning. Everything is new. Summer... our vocation, marriage, and children. A lot of things go along with this one. Some might consider it the toughest of all. But it isn't. Autumn... my personal favorite, but also the quickest of the lot. It's over before it begins, and all the colors fade very fast to brown. It's true that the older we get, the faster time flies. Then, before we know it, we find ourselves in the old age category. Seniors. Discounts for those over 65. Drugs and pill boxes. Aches and pains. Often, we are bored to bits. We watch TV more. We pile more blankets on the bed. Some of us use a hot water bottle to stay warm at night. We don't eat as much. We laugh less. Our clothes hang on us. We're as thin as a coat hanger. Less contact with family and friends. They snatch our driver's license first chance they get. I could go on and on, but your last line says it all...
"Winter's breath has come"
Nicely penned for the Haiku contest! And I wish you lots of luck to win. Love the picture, too. It fits the poem perfectly.
Big Hugs,
Kimbob
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2021
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Hi Sally,
I've always compared the seasons to the stages of life. I link Spring with kids... toddlers through to graduation from Grade 12. It's a time for discovery and learning. Everything is new. Summer... our vocation, marriage, and children. A lot of things go along with this one. Some might consider it the toughest of all. But it isn't. Autumn... my personal favorite, but also the quickest of the lot. It's over before it begins, and all the colors fade very fast to brown. It's true that the older we get, the faster time flies. Then, before we know it, we find ourselves in the old age category. Seniors. Discounts for those over 65. Drugs and pill boxes. Aches and pains. Often, we are bored to bits. We watch TV more. We pile more blankets on the bed. Some of us use a hot water bottle to stay warm at night. We don't eat as much. We laugh less. Our clothes hang on us. We're as thin as a coat hanger. Less contact with family and friends. They snatch our driver's license first chance they get. I could go on and on, but your last line says it all...
"Winter's breath has come"
Nicely penned for the Haiku contest! And I wish you lots of luck to win. Love the picture, too. It fits the poem perfectly.
Big Hugs,
Kimbob
Comment Written 07-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2021
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Well, thank you so much for the lovely review of my haiku. I feel like I?m in first grade with haiku poetry. To get six stars just makes me feel wonderful. I?ve been trying to improve in this, and study. I have around 50 in my archives right now. I pulled this one out for the contest. Thanks again for making me feel so accomplished. Sending all my very best to you and yours as always, Sally XOs
Comment from Begin Again
Oh, Sally, the picture is beautiful and the words match so well, but the shiver it sends down my spine doesn't match. My heart grieves and the gray cold weather makes it worse. I'll pray for spring and summer to come fast. LOL
Hugs, Carol
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2021
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Oh, Sally, the picture is beautiful and the words match so well, but the shiver it sends down my spine doesn't match. My heart grieves and the gray cold weather makes it worse. I'll pray for spring and summer to come fast. LOL
Hugs, Carol
Comment Written 07-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2021
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Thank you so much for the wonderful review of my haiku poem. It is so appreciated. I?m so glad you liked it. Sending along my very best to you as always, Sally XOs
Comment from Cindy Warren
I know the snow is coming. It's been unseasonably warm here. I'm not looking forward to everything being frosted white, especially not my windshield. I love your little haiku, even tho it makes me cold. Hope it wins.
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2021
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I know the snow is coming. It's been unseasonably warm here. I'm not looking forward to everything being frosted white, especially not my windshield. I love your little haiku, even tho it makes me cold. Hope it wins.
Comment Written 06-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2021
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Thank you so much for the beautiful view and kind stars. It is most appreciated. I?ll send you warm regards, Sally XOs
Comment from Liz O'Neill
Some Vermonters have already gotten a little snow and had frosts. Our leaves were mostly yellow. Almost no reds or oranges. It made me really appreciate when I saw an isolated bunch. So many are already saying good by to Fall as you describe in your poem. It hasn't hit me yet. I'm just focusing on getting my wood pellets in.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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Some Vermonters have already gotten a little snow and had frosts. Our leaves were mostly yellow. Almost no reds or oranges. It made me really appreciate when I saw an isolated bunch. So many are already saying good by to Fall as you describe in your poem. It hasn't hit me yet. I'm just focusing on getting my wood pellets in.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2021
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Did you mean to give me four stars ? This is not typically your review. Please advise.
Sal xos
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OMG no I hope you know I wouldn't do such a thing. I have notice if I press enter, it goes down #. Some did the same thing with me. She said wonderful stuff & I got 2 stars...lol I didn't bother say anything, we didn't have the relationship you & I have. I'm glad you got this clarified. I have caught myself most of the time. Fortunately, it doesn't affect our record when we get such low scores.
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Thank you, Liz. I didn't think so. No worries. XOs...
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I am so glad we got that cleared up. I've tried to change the # of stars, they won't us...bwaaa
Comment from Carlos' girl
Uuummm... winter. I love this simple and evocative poem. I like the words you chose. The words "crumbled leaves now frosted white" has such great imagery. It conjures up all kinds of fall to winter scenes. Very nice.
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2021
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Uuummm... winter. I love this simple and evocative poem. I like the words you chose. The words "crumbled leaves now frosted white" has such great imagery. It conjures up all kinds of fall to winter scenes. Very nice.
Comment Written 05-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2021
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Thank you so much for the lovely review and kind compliments. It is so appreciated. Sending along my very best to you as always,
Sally XOs
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You are most welcome sally
