Blue Eyes Seeking
Longing for another oneâ??s affection.4 total reviews
Comment from Mary Shifman
This is an interesting poem. Your rhyme and meter are well done and the imagery creates mental pictures. These dream encounters can be very powerful and filled with so much longing that when we wake up we are filled with an acute sense of loss. Nicely done.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2021
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This is an interesting poem. Your rhyme and meter are well done and the imagery creates mental pictures. These dream encounters can be very powerful and filled with so much longing that when we wake up we are filled with an acute sense of loss. Nicely done.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2021
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Thank you for your review.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This Love Poem Poetry Contest contest entry speaks how blue eyes seek another phase of love and affection, even before danger; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2021
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This Love Poem Poetry Contest contest entry speaks how blue eyes seek another phase of love and affection, even before danger; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
Comment Written 03-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2021
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Thank you for your review.
Comment from persevere
I love your love poem. Dreams seem to originate in daytime reality and your blue eyed woman must really exist. I must say that I did fleetingly wonder whether your bloodhound has blue eyes!
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2021
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I love your love poem. Dreams seem to originate in daytime reality and your blue eyed woman must really exist. I must say that I did fleetingly wonder whether your bloodhound has blue eyes!
Comment Written 03-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2021
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Thank you.
Comment from Mary Kay Bonfante
This is a sweet poem, obviously with a lot of longing; it's not clear how much of it is a dream, and how much is realistic for the poet. The object of your love is certainly real to you.
Suggested revisions:
Longing for anotherâ??s affection.
-->
Longing for another's affection.
[if you put in a straight apostrophe instead of a curly one, you won't get the strange, extra characters]
Your eyes shined
-->
Your eyes shone
["shined" is used when you polished something, like shoes; "shone" is when something gives off light]
I'eve never wanted anything this much.
-->
I've never wanted anything this much.
***
You chose beautiful artwork to go with your poem.
I know you'd rather be near your beloved, but it sounds like you have a very nice dog for company -- probably that's not much consolation.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2021
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This is a sweet poem, obviously with a lot of longing; it's not clear how much of it is a dream, and how much is realistic for the poet. The object of your love is certainly real to you.
Suggested revisions:
Longing for anotherâ??s affection.
-->
Longing for another's affection.
[if you put in a straight apostrophe instead of a curly one, you won't get the strange, extra characters]
Your eyes shined
-->
Your eyes shone
["shined" is used when you polished something, like shoes; "shone" is when something gives off light]
I'eve never wanted anything this much.
-->
I've never wanted anything this much.
***
You chose beautiful artwork to go with your poem.
I know you'd rather be near your beloved, but it sounds like you have a very nice dog for company -- probably that's not much consolation.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2021
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Thank you for the corrections And your review !
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You're very welcome, Lynglyng. Please pet your nice dog, for me. God bless you. Love, Mary Kay xoxo
