Shape Shifter
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "Shape Shifter Part Fourteen"A Detective John Dutton Novellette
8 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
Your use of allusion may get the reader scattering for further research: "Big Ben in his London" & "Like one of his many boyhood villainous heroes Robert-Francois Damiens, who attempted to assassinate King Louis XV said, Adler told Robinette, "This day will be hard!" Then, he repeated the words in French, "La journee sera rude!" Nice touch adding the French.
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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Your use of allusion may get the reader scattering for further research: "Big Ben in his London" & "Like one of his many boyhood villainous heroes Robert-Francois Damiens, who attempted to assassinate King Louis XV said, Adler told Robinette, "This day will be hard!" Then, he repeated the words in French, "La journee sera rude!" Nice touch adding the French.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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Kind of you to review these chapters.
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I was a creative writing teacher, so it's like old times.
Comment from Ulla
Oh, he is a sick bastard isn't he? to enjoy inflicting so much pain. This is very well written, Brett. It's paced right, and the tormentor and the victim appear both genuine and believable. Well done. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Oh, he is a sick bastard isn't he? to enjoy inflicting so much pain. This is very well written, Brett. It's paced right, and the tormentor and the victim appear both genuine and believable. Well done. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 02-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Appreciate your insights and the review.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Adler is one of those brutal monsters who not only enjoys inflicting pain but delights in rubbing it in the pursuers faces. Which takes me back to the joker laughing in faces. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Adler is one of those brutal monsters who not only enjoys inflicting pain but delights in rubbing it in the pursuers faces. Which takes me back to the joker laughing in faces. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Once again appreciate your dupport.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I like your story. Dutton has another murder scene.
An uncontrollable, overwhelming urge to straighten them, resulted in self-asphyxiation.
In anguish he screamed at the sight of the shiny blade in Adler's hand, "Why are you doing this to me?"
(these two sentences confused me - if he self-asphyxiated, how could he see the blade and scream?)
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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I like your story. Dutton has another murder scene.
An uncontrollable, overwhelming urge to straighten them, resulted in self-asphyxiation.
In anguish he screamed at the sight of the shiny blade in Adler's hand, "Why are you doing this to me?"
(these two sentences confused me - if he self-asphyxiated, how could he see the blade and scream?)
Comment Written 01-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Appreciate your insights and the review.
Comment from AliMom
A bloody scary and dramatic piece of writing. It made my skin crawl. It was very graphic but like any good horror, it was difficult to turn away. Too much info on the boyhood villainous hero part. It is tongue-twisting and mind-bending and you have to find a cleaner way to present it. It was a little distracting. Masterful how the perpetrator winds up on the floor hugging his victim. It adds another layer to his bedeviled character.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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A bloody scary and dramatic piece of writing. It made my skin crawl. It was very graphic but like any good horror, it was difficult to turn away. Too much info on the boyhood villainous hero part. It is tongue-twisting and mind-bending and you have to find a cleaner way to present it. It was a little distracting. Masterful how the perpetrator winds up on the floor hugging his victim. It adds another layer to his bedeviled character.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Appreciate your insights and review.
Comment from dellsworthpoet
This is a detailed and gruesome scene. The imagery is good. The flow is good. The words fit the subject well. And our villain in the end becomes a tortured soul.
As I picture this there would be blood everywhere and intestines and organs on the floor. You might give us a bit of that as he lays hugging his victim.
A good although not pleasant read. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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This is a detailed and gruesome scene. The imagery is good. The flow is good. The words fit the subject well. And our villain in the end becomes a tortured soul.
As I picture this there would be blood everywhere and intestines and organs on the floor. You might give us a bit of that as he lays hugging his victim.
A good although not pleasant read. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Glad you enjoyed this chapter. Appreciate the review.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Judy Lawless
Wow, it almost worries me that you can come up with this depth of insanity and horrendous acts for your character, Adler. It's intense, descriptive writing for sure, Brett. For that reason, I'm still reading.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Wow, it almost worries me that you can come up with this depth of insanity and horrendous acts for your character, Adler. It's intense, descriptive writing for sure, Brett. For that reason, I'm still reading.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Glad you enjoyed this chapter. Appreciate the review.
Comment from C. Gale Burnett
Absolutely, creatively gross which means GREAT STORYTELLING. I am happy that throughout Toby's mutilation, the story seemed to focus more on Adler's reaction than Toby's experience. I like to sometimes watch the TV show 'Criminal Minds' because I always have a need to know what makes a person do what they do. Your story compares in that aspect.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Absolutely, creatively gross which means GREAT STORYTELLING. I am happy that throughout Toby's mutilation, the story seemed to focus more on Adler's reaction than Toby's experience. I like to sometimes watch the TV show 'Criminal Minds' because I always have a need to know what makes a person do what they do. Your story compares in that aspect.
Comment Written 30-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2021
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Appreciate your insights and the thoughtful review.
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You are so welcome.
