Love is a Many Splintered Thing
rude awakening4 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
Good for Jake to stop and hurry back to overhear the people he was concerned for actually planning his demise! I guess it's good that he didn't get on that plane! Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2021
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Good for Jake to stop and hurry back to overhear the people he was concerned for actually planning his demise! I guess it's good that he didn't get on that plane! Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 20-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2021
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yep, although he's still in a pickle. :)
thanks for reading.
Comment from Brian S. Watson
Great story and very moving and very romantic narrative poem! It sound's like something out of one of those romantic movie scenes that you see at the end of a movie.
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2021
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Great story and very moving and very romantic narrative poem! It sound's like something out of one of those romantic movie scenes that you see at the end of a movie.
Comment Written 19-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2021
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Thank you very much, Brian. And especially for the 6!
The ending was pretty cruel, really - the old double-cross, but I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from LisaMay
My head was spinning as much as poor jake's with this fast-paced action thriller write. The transition from the moonglow of a wonderful weekend to discovering he is about to be despatched is carried well with thought, dialogue, and action.
The only correction i suggest is that the comma is unnecessary between Poor, Jake near the end.
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2021
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My head was spinning as much as poor jake's with this fast-paced action thriller write. The transition from the moonglow of a wonderful weekend to discovering he is about to be despatched is carried well with thought, dialogue, and action.
The only correction i suggest is that the comma is unnecessary between Poor, Jake near the end.
Comment Written 19-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2021
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oops. thanks. will ck it out and thanks for your super response, Lisa.
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
Seems like poor old Jake is on a hiding to nothing here. properly stitched up.
'Do you know if anyone was killed?"- use the same style of speech tags throughout. Here the opening is single but the closing double.
All the best
GMG
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2021
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Hi there,
Seems like poor old Jake is on a hiding to nothing here. properly stitched up.
'Do you know if anyone was killed?"- use the same style of speech tags throughout. Here the opening is single but the closing double.
All the best
GMG
Comment Written 19-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 19-Aug-2021
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Sorry, but your first sentence escaped me. However, thanks for reading and commenting.
