Fifty Days of Friendship
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Charlie"A first person story about various friends.
19 total reviews
Comment from Kerry L Batchelder
I love your humor and detail. You have a very captivating style of writing which draws me in and wanting to hear more. Your friendship sounds much like the friends my husband had when he was young, or my dad. Thank you for the memories.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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I love your humor and detail. You have a very captivating style of writing which draws me in and wanting to hear more. Your friendship sounds much like the friends my husband had when he was young, or my dad. Thank you for the memories.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Thank you, Kerry, for the exceptional review. Bill
Comment from Sugarray77
So well written, Bill. I loved the nostalgic tone with a nod to realism. You did well in character descriptions and development through the narrative. I really enjoyed reading it.
Melissa
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2021
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So well written, Bill. I loved the nostalgic tone with a nod to realism. You did well in character descriptions and development through the narrative. I really enjoyed reading it.
Melissa
Comment Written 24-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2021
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Thank you, Melissa, for the kind review. Bill
Comment from Earl Corp
I read what I think was the first chapter about the little red-haired girl who moved away and you ended up marrying her. Charlie sounds like quite the character. Keep'em coming.
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2021
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I read what I think was the first chapter about the little red-haired girl who moved away and you ended up marrying her. Charlie sounds like quite the character. Keep'em coming.
Comment Written 23-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2021
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Thank you, Earl, for giving this a look. Bill
Comment from Ben Colder
No doubt she was. Lifestyle always reveal your inside thoughts. The dump, rats, snakes, trash, etc are examples that is within. War on your body with smoking. A fight that surfaces within.
I enjoyed your write.
Charlie sounds like someone I once knew. Many Charlies out there.
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2021
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No doubt she was. Lifestyle always reveal your inside thoughts. The dump, rats, snakes, trash, etc are examples that is within. War on your body with smoking. A fight that surfaces within.
I enjoyed your write.
Charlie sounds like someone I once knew. Many Charlies out there.
Comment Written 23-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2021
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Was I just analyzed? Sounds like I need help.
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Not you. Charlie' parents. Bad leadership for Charlie
Comment from Goodadvicechan
I like the way your describe what friendship is, how it is being built...
I also like how you and Charlie become friends, the games you played and how you enjoyed each other's friendship.
It is unfortunate such a good friendship only lasts a short years...
Thank you for sharing...
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2021
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I like the way your describe what friendship is, how it is being built...
I also like how you and Charlie become friends, the games you played and how you enjoyed each other's friendship.
It is unfortunate such a good friendship only lasts a short years...
Thank you for sharing...
Comment Written 23-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2021
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Thank you, Chan, for the excellent review. Bill
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Thank you, Chan, for the excellent review. Bill
Comment from lyenochka
That's quite the friend! Your brother was just a few years older? The one who was a mechanic in Alaska? At least, he was a good source of friends and even an almost girlfriend. I get the feeling that Charlie's sister might have been using you. You must have been really cute!
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2021
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That's quite the friend! Your brother was just a few years older? The one who was a mechanic in Alaska? At least, he was a good source of friends and even an almost girlfriend. I get the feeling that Charlie's sister might have been using you. You must have been really cute!
Comment Written 22-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 23-Mar-2021
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Like the man said: If you?re going to use me, use me up. Thank you, lyenochka.
Comment from Mastery
Hey, Bill. I like the sound of this intro chapter (or second one if that be true) Anyway, I see a lot of potential in this so far, partly because everything you mentioned was part of my teen years too. LOL Even my old man smoked Luckies, can you believe that?
Good job, my friend. Bob
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
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Hey, Bill. I like the sound of this intro chapter (or second one if that be true) Anyway, I see a lot of potential in this so far, partly because everything you mentioned was part of my teen years too. LOL Even my old man smoked Luckies, can you believe that?
Good job, my friend. Bob
Comment Written 22-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
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Gee, this is the same review twice. Hope I get credited for two. : )
Comment from Mastery
Hey, Bill. I like the sound of this intro chapter (or second one if that be true) Anyway, I see a lot of potential in this so far, partly because everything you mentioned was part of my teen years too. LOL Even my old man smoked Luckies, can you believe that?
Good job, my friend. Bob
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
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Hey, Bill. I like the sound of this intro chapter (or second one if that be true) Anyway, I see a lot of potential in this so far, partly because everything you mentioned was part of my teen years too. LOL Even my old man smoked Luckies, can you believe that?
Good job, my friend. Bob
Comment Written 22-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
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Thanks, Bob. I guess we all grow up with similar friends, play areas, and habits.
Comment from Jeff Watkins
I loved the understated last line as well. You have inspired me to write about some childhood experiences. I'm trying to find time to write an autobiography anyway. I have to finish a short story first.
Is the car unconcerned about the snakes?
Whom refers to kids. It is not the object of saw. Therefore who is the correct word.
You chose not to explain the lessons or influences in these experiences, instead inviting the reader to intuit them and thus be enriched -by them also. Nicely done.
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
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I loved the understated last line as well. You have inspired me to write about some childhood experiences. I'm trying to find time to write an autobiography anyway. I have to finish a short story first.
Is the car unconcerned about the snakes?
Whom refers to kids. It is not the object of saw. Therefore who is the correct word.
You chose not to explain the lessons or influences in these experiences, instead inviting the reader to intuit them and thus be enriched -by them also. Nicely done.
Comment Written 22-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
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Thank you, Jeff, for the terrific review. The WHO is in, though it took me a couple readings to be convinced. I know the junkyard sentence has a misplaced modifier and I swear it shall be revised.
Comment from Cindy Decker 2
Bill,,this is a nice timeline with smooth transitions. I like the fact you played in coal and the dump when you were younger. I can't appreciate that you would play around snakes! Your story is an excellent exercise in childhood memories.
Good luck in the contest.
Best wishes, Cindy
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
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Bill,,this is a nice timeline with smooth transitions. I like the fact you played in coal and the dump when you were younger. I can't appreciate that you would play around snakes! Your story is an excellent exercise in childhood memories.
Good luck in the contest.
Best wishes, Cindy
Comment Written 22-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
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Thank you, Cindy
