Comment from Earl Corp

Excellent

What a muddled mess they made of this. Are ther really bees that don't sting? That sounded like a pretty cool idea. Are you done with this book? Good luck with it.

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 08-Mar-2021

That's it. Thanks for giving this a look, Earl.

Comment from Mary Vigasin

Excellent

Bill,
You have some Monty Python in you! "leave it too clever." A character called Jerry Mathers. Mame Dennis, Clarice, Honor Bonner, and Clarice Darrow! So they were Mayon not his! and with a little Marx Bros tossed in!
What a fun read.
Regards.
Mary

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 07-Mar-2021

Thanks, Mary.

Comment from Rdfrdmom2

Excellent

Bill:

I am really sorry I didn't catch up with this story earlier. I certainly enjoyed all the plays on names as well as the puns and jokes throughout this chapter. I am going to have to go back and read this from the beginning.

Rdfrdmom2

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 07-Mar-2021

Thanks,, R

Comment from Leann DS

Excellent

Oh, the "leave it to Beaver "references! Chuckling. Nice story with effective dialogue. And I love leave it to beaver. How could you make beaver the bad guy? LOL I like the judge's character. He's a goof! Hugs.

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 07-Mar-2021

Thanks, Leann. I'm assembling some characters for further consideration.

Comment from royowen

Excellent

Your stories, or scripts always have that great, quirky side to them, with the characters to match. This seems like one of those cases where the characters in the courtroom know each other incredibly well. Beautifully written Bill. Well dine, blessings Roy
Query, I was wondering how bull returned the bottle to his drawer and yet was sipping from it Bill?

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 06-Mar-2021

Without acknowledgement, Bull reached into his left, bottom drawer and fetched two pints of bourbon. He placed one in front of D'weir.

Another mystery solved. Thank you, Roy for giving this a look and for the kind words. Bill

reply by royowen on 06-Mar-2021

Thanks Bill, must have missed it

Comment from Jay Squires

Excellent

I do wish, Bill, that I had read this from the beginning. Do you have any plans with it? Publishing it? Self-pubbing it? As I think I mentioned to you before, the formatting of this book seems like it would have fit more of a screenplay genre, even stage play. What's next in your bag of tricks?

Thank you, Detective, but we'll just leave it to Cleaver." [Hahaha! Okay!]

"So they were Mayan -- not His'n," said the judge with a grin. [Nothing like a judge with a sense of humor.]

I'll be waiting for your next offering.

 Comment Written 04-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 05-Mar-2021

So I was writing this Baker?s Dozen story which ended cold. I then began a sequel, Assassin Nation, which ran out of steam without an end in sight. Starting a new project, A Murder a Month, I was running out of gas until I thought to link the killer in the story to Assassin Nation. That way I gave the second story an iffy ending while giving enough life to the third story to end it.
This story, Zoo Murder, is a second tale with the antihero cop, Bull Schlitz. I am open to suggestions.

reply by Jay Squires on 05-Mar-2021

Thank you for providing the mega-story's genesis. Are you Bull Schlitz? Is Bill Schott full of Schlitz? I'm starting to sound like the judge now.

I admire your use of Fanstory as a sort of artist's board, a place where you can let your projects breathe their own life, procreate to other projects, or die their own beautiful deaths. You have your own Universe here on Fanstory, Bill. Bravo!

Comment from Elizabeth Emerald

Excellent

Very punny--a lively bunch of characters--amusing banter--holds interest--so, is this really the end of the book?

[affadavits=>AFFIDAVITS] to that [affect=>EFFECT], Your Honor."

 Comment Written 04-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 05-Mar-2021

Thank you for your helpful review, Liz.

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

This is a most bizarre court case and the judge keeps making humorous statements like "Leave it to Cleaver" and "sirloin" for Cyril etc. But it seems there are personal connections between all the people so I hope justice was really served.

Minor nit: Missing periods--
"Sounds like a walk in the park, Counselor"
"See you on the links at seven a.m., Carlos"

 Comment Written 04-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 05-Mar-2021

Since it?s fiction and satirical I can assure you no justice was served.

reply by lyenochka on 05-Mar-2021

Hmm. Doesn't that happen in real life?

reply by the author on 05-Mar-2021

Justice? No, not at all.

Comment from Gert sherwood

Excellent

A chapter in the book Zoo Murder:
Zoo Murder: Believe It or Not
Bill Schott this chapter in your book about the Zoo murder. I will say was really good of how you wrote about how the bees could cause one to have a stroke after being stung by bees that have no stingers

 Comment Written 04-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 04-Mar-2021

Thanks, Gert.

reply by Gert sherwood on 04-Mar-2021

You are welcome Bill Schott
Gert

Comment from nomi338

Excellent

Very tidy. You know of course that there are many who believe that a friendly relationship between law enforcement and the judiciary should not exist. some believe that they can receive no justice when expediency takes the day as described in this amusing tale.

 Comment Written 04-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 04-Mar-2021

That may be true. My understanding is that more cases go this route, or something like it, than by trial.