Not a Bed of Roses
Free Verse - Human Suffering29 total reviews
Comment from harmony13
The author's words are filled with emotion, are descriptive and creative.
I pondered on the theme of these words. The poem flows and connects well. The are work goes well with both the theme and words of this poem.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2021
The author's words are filled with emotion, are descriptive and creative.
I pondered on the theme of these words. The poem flows and connects well. The are work goes well with both the theme and words of this poem.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2021
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Thank you!
Comment from Iza Deleanu
The final stanza, it engraves humanity as we know it:"Human suffering is a vast stormy sea of emotions!
All these can render a person wholly crushed mentally,
spiritually, financially and even physically to the edge
of sanity in a chasm of hopelessness and despair." Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
The final stanza, it engraves humanity as we know it:"Human suffering is a vast stormy sea of emotions!
All these can render a person wholly crushed mentally,
spiritually, financially and even physically to the edge
of sanity in a chasm of hopelessness and despair." Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
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Iza thank you have a great Thursday.🙏🙏
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You make many valid points, Mystery Author, about suffering on one's lifetime. Your lines/words flow smoothly with good details and great imagery. You give readers much to think about in their own lives.
May I suggest ~
What comes over the passage of time
to all human beings, are [ is--need singular verb for singular subject] at best only
fears, doubts, regrets,
that have [has--same reason ] the potential to cause suffering.
Then, much less desirable,
the worst in human sufferings,
are [ is--same reason as before ] the unexpected, heart-wrenching losses.
Best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
You make many valid points, Mystery Author, about suffering on one's lifetime. Your lines/words flow smoothly with good details and great imagery. You give readers much to think about in their own lives.
May I suggest ~
What comes over the passage of time
to all human beings, are [ is--need singular verb for singular subject] at best only
fears, doubts, regrets,
that have [has--same reason ] the potential to cause suffering.
Then, much less desirable,
the worst in human sufferings,
are [ is--same reason as before ] the unexpected, heart-wrenching losses.
Best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
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Blessings back Jan! 🙏😉
Comment from Jean Lutz1
Words so true I feel like I penned them. Yet thru suffering hope can build. I have no idea how many times I've started over. Still it feels like the deeper I sink, the higher I climb. I feel like I resemble the image in this artwork -- yet I see the mountain top. Best wishes. Keep writing. Keep climbing.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
Words so true I feel like I penned them. Yet thru suffering hope can build. I have no idea how many times I've started over. Still it feels like the deeper I sink, the higher I climb. I feel like I resemble the image in this artwork -- yet I see the mountain top. Best wishes. Keep writing. Keep climbing.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
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Jean, right there with you! As long as hope stays alive one can grasp a rung and climb back out and out.
Comment from Joanne Gill-Maddick
This is a well written poem about human suffering. There is so much human suffering from the time your born until you die. Unfortunately that's life. We take the good with the bad and do the best we can. Very well done. Great photo. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
This is a well written poem about human suffering. There is so much human suffering from the time your born until you die. Unfortunately that's life. We take the good with the bad and do the best we can. Very well done. Great photo. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
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Joanne, than you for the validation, and good wishes!
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Your welcome
Comment from karenina
While I was taken with your insight to human suffering, and realize free verse if...well, what you want it to be-- I think this poem would have benefited from some editing. Leaner lines, sleeker delivery... No need for
anything extraneous. The subject is heavy and has maximum impact without the need, for example for "So..." in the final stanza. This is not so much critique as it is my preference, I realize that... Not an easy theme to tackle. Kudos for sharing!--Karenina
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
While I was taken with your insight to human suffering, and realize free verse if...well, what you want it to be-- I think this poem would have benefited from some editing. Leaner lines, sleeker delivery... No need for
anything extraneous. The subject is heavy and has maximum impact without the need, for example for "So..." in the final stanza. This is not so much critique as it is my preference, I realize that... Not an easy theme to tackle. Kudos for sharing!--Karenina
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
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I welcome each and every morsel of thought and critique. Always! Thank you.
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Whew. I hesitate, sometimes, to express my opinion or preference-- I absolutely would not want to offend!--Karenina
Comment from royowen
I guess like the sense of touch, or the others in communion with it, are the warning devices, that injury or pleasure are being administered, the same with the emotions which always seem to control thinking, even when completely irrational, it's hard, but it's best to separate the mind from the emotion. Beautifully written my friend, a comprehensive and thoughtful application of articulate thinking to this delightful entry, good luck, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
I guess like the sense of touch, or the others in communion with it, are the warning devices, that injury or pleasure are being administered, the same with the emotions which always seem to control thinking, even when completely irrational, it's hard, but it's best to separate the mind from the emotion. Beautifully written my friend, a comprehensive and thoughtful application of articulate thinking to this delightful entry, good luck, blessings Roy
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
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Roy, thanks for your kind and validating thoughts and words.
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Welcome
Comment from lancellot
Well one cannot argue with all that suffering. Life is a struggle and then means suffering.
This a very good entry. I wondered what this contest would inspire.
from the very first {breathe} of life
- breath
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reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
Well one cannot argue with all that suffering. Life is a struggle and then means suffering.
This a very good entry. I wondered what this contest would inspire.
from the very first {breathe} of life
- breath
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
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Yikes that dangling "e" could be a problem! Great catch -- Thanks!
Comment from equestrik
This is a good presentation for the free verse contest about human suffering. The picture with your write depict your emotions and truths really well.
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reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
This is a good presentation for the free verse contest about human suffering. The picture with your write depict your emotions and truths really well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2021
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I appreciate your validation - thank you!