Heart Crafted Poems -2021
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Blast retirement (Sheshire)"Musings of an old man -2021
30 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This sheshire, Blast Retirement, has the proper formatting and finds that the new way of life, post working, is hard to accomplish in quarantine.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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This sheshire, Blast Retirement, has the proper formatting and finds that the new way of life, post working, is hard to accomplish in quarantine.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Thanks Bill.
Comment from Wendy G
Yes, I sense your frustration. Not exactly what you had in mind for your retirement!. But you will have more time for writing, and exploring new modes of creativity. Good wishes!
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Yes, I sense your frustration. Not exactly what you had in mind for your retirement!. But you will have more time for writing, and exploring new modes of creativity. Good wishes!
Comment Written 17-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Wendy, yes 👍!
Comment from Janice Canerdy
I know people who thought they couldn't wait to retire, did retire, and went back to work within months! Your poem is descriptive and well put-together. You're right; there can be only so many honey-do lists!
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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I know people who thought they couldn't wait to retire, did retire, and went back to work within months! Your poem is descriptive and well put-together. You're right; there can be only so many honey-do lists!
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Thanks, smiling back Janice...
Comment from Susan Larson
I don't know anything about the Sheshire form of poetry so I have nothing to say about that, but I do appreciate the satirical approach you take on retirement. Nicely done.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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I don't know anything about the Sheshire form of poetry so I have nothing to say about that, but I do appreciate the satirical approach you take on retirement. Nicely done.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Susan, thanks for the review.
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written poem you have penned for the Potlatch Poetry club. You used very good descriptive words and very neat imagery. Thank you for sharing. Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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This is a very well written poem you have penned for the Potlatch Poetry club. You used very good descriptive words and very neat imagery. Thank you for sharing. Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Teri, thank your for your review and comments.
Comment from harmony13
The author's words are interesting, humorous, and creative. I enjoyed the reading of this poem. It made me smile a lot. I found much of this to
be so true in retirement life. However, there is a time for everything
even Retirement Life! I love the artwork and it compliments these words.
Hope you are doing well!......Maria
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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The author's words are interesting, humorous, and creative. I enjoyed the reading of this poem. It made me smile a lot. I found much of this to
be so true in retirement life. However, there is a time for everything
even Retirement Life! I love the artwork and it compliments these words.
Hope you are doing well!......Maria
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Maria, I?m going back to work for a couple of more years until things settle back down and we can again travel safety.
Comment from Suzanna Ray
Dear JLR, this poem was hard to follow even with your excellent punctuation. But I am not surprised seeing the rules you had to follow. I can see why, that by complying with the rhyme scheme, much less the other restrictions, that this post made any sense at all. Perhaps my problem is that, I haven't the slightest idea of what a
"Sheshire Poem IS.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Dear JLR, this poem was hard to follow even with your excellent punctuation. But I am not surprised seeing the rules you had to follow. I can see why, that by complying with the rhyme scheme, much less the other restrictions, that this post made any sense at all. Perhaps my problem is that, I haven't the slightest idea of what a
"Sheshire Poem IS.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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I could not agree more fully. My first and last Sheshire poem....LOL
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I love this form, but the meter is missing from yours unfortunately, but I enjoyed the subject matter and your inventive end rhymes.
An example of the meter:
When I was only nine or ten
and winter's chilly nights dumped snow,
I loved to help my daddy then
We'd bundle up, he'd say, "Let's go!"
Together, we two working men
would scrape and push and scoop and throw.
Love Dolly x
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
|
I love this form, but the meter is missing from yours unfortunately, but I enjoyed the subject matter and your inventive end rhymes.
An example of the meter:
When I was only nine or ten
and winter's chilly nights dumped snow,
I loved to help my daddy then
We'd bundle up, he'd say, "Let's go!"
Together, we two working men
would scrape and push and scoop and throw.
Love Dolly x
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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I could not agree more fully. My first and last Sheshire poem....LOL
Comment from robyn corum
JLR,
I can't imagine anyone breathing who wouldn't be able to relate to this poem and it's contents.
What a year! So many challenges and frustrations. Crazy.
I appreciate the clever format - and thought you did this one really well!
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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JLR,
I can't imagine anyone breathing who wouldn't be able to relate to this poem and it's contents.
What a year! So many challenges and frustrations. Crazy.
I appreciate the clever format - and thought you did this one really well!
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
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Thank you Robyn.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Sheshire poem about retirement and all the changes that going with it. Your last stanza should have the normal six-line before the ending couplet.
This resulted in not much laughter
too much Netflix, I need a restart!
Then on one snowy day it came, Wham!
This retirement is a disaster!
Xxxxccccccccçc. -art
Xxxxcçcccccccc. -am
It must be a new job, an upstart.(different couplet rhyme)
Sorry, but be patient my bride, ma'am. Honey-do's; done, take-heart.. (different couplet rhyme)
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
|
A very well-written Sheshire poem about retirement and all the changes that going with it. Your last stanza should have the normal six-line before the ending couplet.
This resulted in not much laughter
too much Netflix, I need a restart!
Then on one snowy day it came, Wham!
This retirement is a disaster!
Xxxxccccccccçc. -art
Xxxxcçcccccccc. -am
It must be a new job, an upstart.(different couplet rhyme)
Sorry, but be patient my bride, ma'am. Honey-do's; done, take-heart.. (different couplet rhyme)
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
-
I could not agree more fully. My first and last Sheshire poem....LOL
