Zoo Murder:
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Zoo Murder"Bull Schlitz has a case of murder at the zoo.
19 total reviews
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
Cements their relationship, and personalities. Well done. Is there a way to load a book all at once? My favorite writing is mystery/ crime. My favorite reading too.
Karen
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
Cements their relationship, and personalities. Well done. Is there a way to load a book all at once? My favorite writing is mystery/ crime. My favorite reading too.
Karen
Comment Written 12-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2023
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If you look at top of the chapter you will see numbered links to the next chapters. Click on the ellipsis and all chapters will be displayed on another dropdown page.
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Majorly cool. Today is my Birthday, and I have been writing all day. I am happy but my butt is dead. Have a good week.
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
This looks to be a new case in a new book. Inspector Schlitz has a penchant to give his detectives his own slant on their unique names. So once again he dubs another detective with a nickname. Dweirdo? Really?
Ralf
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2021
This looks to be a new case in a new book. Inspector Schlitz has a penchant to give his detectives his own slant on their unique names. So once again he dubs another detective with a nickname. Dweirdo? Really?
Ralf
Comment Written 07-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2021
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It's his way. : )
Comment from robyn corum
Bull -- er -- Bill,
Sorry. I guess I read these out of order, maybe. IDK. Man, you are turning them out like crazy!. This one was simple and really easy to follow - good for foolish folks like me that can't think about two things at a time. It was well-written and enjoyable. Thanks!
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2021
Bull -- er -- Bill,
Sorry. I guess I read these out of order, maybe. IDK. Man, you are turning them out like crazy!. This one was simple and really easy to follow - good for foolish folks like me that can't think about two things at a time. It was well-written and enjoyable. Thanks!
Comment Written 06-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2021
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Thank you for giving this a look.
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Oh, good -- a nickname right off the bat... yep, this promises to be entertaining at best (or straining for poor D'Weir!)... ;) :) Looking forward to what's transpired and who's expired at the zoo... ;) Yvette
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2021
Oh, good -- a nickname right off the bat... yep, this promises to be entertaining at best (or straining for poor D'Weir!)... ;) :) Looking forward to what's transpired and who's expired at the zoo... ;) Yvette
Comment Written 05-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 05-Jan-2021
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I hope he figures this out; I?m baffled.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I can't wait to read this one, it has started of well. I like the new detective, he has a lot to learn when it comes to working with Bull. Now there is a murder in the zoo. Let's go sort this one out! Well done, Bill. :)) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2021
I can't wait to read this one, it has started of well. I like the new detective, he has a lot to learn when it comes to working with Bull. Now there is a murder in the zoo. Let's go sort this one out! Well done, Bill. :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 04-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2021
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Thank you, Sandra. I hope this works out well and is fun to read.
Comment from Mastery
Hi Bill Glad to see a new episode of your detective series. It should be fun. LOL
Suggestions: ""Hi, Inspector Schlitz." (Leave "Hi" off of this.) Cops don't talk like that as a rule, I don't think. "Hi," sounds a little prissy.
And: I cannot see these clothes? Give them some color, I think: "Detective wears slacks, shirt, and tie which all look as if they are his only, well-worn outfit."
How about, a blue short sleeved shirt and tan slacks for example.
And, May I suggest starting with a new paragraph here? ".......stenciled words on the glass; they hadn't yet been applied."
Change this also: ""Sure. Fine." to "Yes, have a seat." perhaps.
And: Change here: "" "If you understand, tell ME." "Yes, that's right. If you know why, tell me, will you?."
I await the next chapter, Bill. Bob
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
Hi Bill Glad to see a new episode of your detective series. It should be fun. LOL
Suggestions: ""Hi, Inspector Schlitz." (Leave "Hi" off of this.) Cops don't talk like that as a rule, I don't think. "Hi," sounds a little prissy.
And: I cannot see these clothes? Give them some color, I think: "Detective wears slacks, shirt, and tie which all look as if they are his only, well-worn outfit."
How about, a blue short sleeved shirt and tan slacks for example.
And, May I suggest starting with a new paragraph here? ".......stenciled words on the glass; they hadn't yet been applied."
Change this also: ""Sure. Fine." to "Yes, have a seat." perhaps.
And: Change here: "" "If you understand, tell ME." "Yes, that's right. If you know why, tell me, will you?."
I await the next chapter, Bill. Bob
Comment Written 03-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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Descriptions of things other than action are a weak point for me, obviously. As far as Bull?s dialogue, I will add more to his character sketch to explain his terse and unwelcoming speech. He uses as few words as necessary, and is not a people person.
D?weir is the polar opposite of Schlitz. He is optimistic, energetic, and almost unassuming for someone who has made detective. He, like many people, starts with a smile, but can revert to Mr. Hyde when necessary.
This should become more obvious as we go along.
Thank you for the great feedback and input.
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I will be enjoying it I am sure, Bill. :) Bob
Comment from Suzanna Ray
Dear Bill, does Bull Schlitz have to handle his newly us assigned assistant detective in the same manner that he handled his previous one. This hero certainly has a lot of rough edges. But I suppose I do not need to like his personality to know that in the end, he will bring the bad guys to justice.
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
Dear Bill, does Bull Schlitz have to handle his newly us assigned assistant detective in the same manner that he handled his previous one. This hero certainly has a lot of rough edges. But I suppose I do not need to like his personality to know that in the end, he will bring the bad guys to justice.
Comment Written 03-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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I know some very capable and depedable men and women with whom you would not want to be friends.
Comment from Jerome Goldberg
Bill - interesting opening, curious to see where it is going to go. Since the murder is at the zoo, I hope that they will get right to work and are not going to horse around or get into any monkey business. - LOL - Jerry
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
Bill - interesting opening, curious to see where it is going to go. Since the murder is at the zoo, I hope that they will get right to work and are not going to horse around or get into any monkey business. - LOL - Jerry
Comment Written 03-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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I'd be lion if I said they wouldn't.
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Ouch!
Comment from nomi338
Nice guy. He just might be campaigning for another butt whipping. Has he not learned to be nice to guys he does not know. Any new guy coming into his life could be a deadly assassin. What a numbnuts.
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
Nice guy. He just might be campaigning for another butt whipping. Has he not learned to be nice to guys he does not know. Any new guy coming into his life could be a deadly assassin. What a numbnuts.
Comment Written 03-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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It's his way.
Comment from Sally Law
Although this is short, I thought it was clear, crisp with a touch of sarcasm. Your characters and scene are well described. A fine start to the lives of crime investigations. Sending you my best with six stars,
Sal :) XOs...
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
Although this is short, I thought it was clear, crisp with a touch of sarcasm. Your characters and scene are well described. A fine start to the lives of crime investigations. Sending you my best with six stars,
Sal :) XOs...
Comment Written 03-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2021
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Thank you so much, Sally. I?ll try to keep it somewhat believable.
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You did great! ;)