Poetic Birdsong
Enjoying the musical delight of avian lyrics.18 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
So cool! Did you create the picture? And you fulfilled the essence poem structure perfectly. I don't know what the language of birds are like but I would transcribe the sounds into measures like in music so "no words" is perfect. Best wishes in the contest!!
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2020
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So cool! Did you create the picture? And you fulfilled the essence poem structure perfectly. I don't know what the language of birds are like but I would transcribe the sounds into measures like in music so "no words" is perfect. Best wishes in the contest!!
Comment Written 19-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2020
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No, I didn't create the picture myself - it's off the internet.
Thanks for your comments about my poem.
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
We are surrounded by birds, in the summer. We hear their tweets and trills, every day. We are so used to the sound we fail to appreciate the choir in the trees. But, come summer, I will listen. This is a sweet presentation.
Ralf
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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We are surrounded by birds, in the summer. We hear their tweets and trills, every day. We are so used to the sound we fail to appreciate the choir in the trees. But, come summer, I will listen. This is a sweet presentation.
Ralf
Comment Written 19-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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It's summer here and my plum tree is fruiting so there are lots of birds spouting 'poetry'.
Comment from Pantygynt
Cross rhyming is of course a subset of internal rhyme. I hope those who sit in judgment on this are aware of that fact. Accompanied by an appropriate illustration where the only bird that is mute is the lady. Americans won't understand that as they insist on calling the little spotted girls lady bugs!
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Cross rhyming is of course a subset of internal rhyme. I hope those who sit in judgment on this are aware of that fact. Accompanied by an appropriate illustration where the only bird that is mute is the lady. Americans won't understand that as they insist on calling the little spotted girls lady bugs!
Comment Written 19-Dec-2020
Comment from RodG
The one joy of my life these days is watching the birds at my feeder. Many peck at seeds on the ground. Mostly they eat; they do not sing. I am glad the Speaker hears poems "trilling" in their songs. Rod
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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The one joy of my life these days is watching the birds at my feeder. Many peck at seeds on the ground. Mostly they eat; they do not sing. I am glad the Speaker hears poems "trilling" in their songs. Rod
Comment Written 19-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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My plum tree is fruiting and the birds are going crazy... I love having so many birds in my back yard, but worry about the cat causing them a problem. She wears a bell and hasn't caught any so far.
Comment from Patricia Cammish
Hi Lisa May
Sweet eye catching illustration aptly setting the mood for this ditty.
As you have created a symmetrical balance of words (except for poem) around your centrally placed mandatory internal rhyme , I wonder if it might be a good idea to put two words in place of 'Poems' ...not everyone naturally pronounces that word with two beats.
Just a thought.
Excellent idea though.
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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Hi Lisa May
Sweet eye catching illustration aptly setting the mood for this ditty.
As you have created a symmetrical balance of words (except for poem) around your centrally placed mandatory internal rhyme , I wonder if it might be a good idea to put two words in place of 'Poems' ...not everyone naturally pronounces that word with two beats.
Just a thought.
Excellent idea though.
Comment Written 19-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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I don't think there is a comparable 2-word replacement for 'poems'. Symmetry is secondary in this instance. Americans will just have to adapt and pronounce the word correctly, haha.
Comment from padumachitta
Hello
well, good luck in the two line peotry contest. You certainly nailed the rules and gave us a cute wee poem to boot.
We have no birds here in winter to make a song...but come spring...perhaps...
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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Hello
well, good luck in the two line peotry contest. You certainly nailed the rules and gave us a cute wee poem to boot.
We have no birds here in winter to make a song...but come spring...perhaps...
Comment Written 19-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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It's summer here and my fruit tree has plenty of plums, so the birds are busy.
Comment from Eternal Muse
This is such a cute 2 line poem! It's adorable and I wish I had a six for it. You packed volumes in these beautiful lines and your lines even rhyme! Great imagery and visuals; loved your artistic presentation and artwork.
This should do very well in the contest; good luck in the booths.
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reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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This is such a cute 2 line poem! It's adorable and I wish I had a six for it. You packed volumes in these beautiful lines and your lines even rhyme! Great imagery and visuals; loved your artistic presentation and artwork.
This should do very well in the contest; good luck in the booths.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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Thank you very much for your wonderfully supportive review.
Comment from Debbie Pope
You have written the perfect essence poem. I've never heard bird trilling compared to poetry before, but that is the most apt analogy I have ever read. And, you picked exceptional words to rhyme. You have a winner for sure.
Let me ask you though, why did you capitalize the word trees? It is not a criticism. Capitalization and punctuation is something that I struggle with in my short poems. Any words of advice?
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reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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You have written the perfect essence poem. I've never heard bird trilling compared to poetry before, but that is the most apt analogy I have ever read. And, you picked exceptional words to rhyme. You have a winner for sure.
Let me ask you though, why did you capitalize the word trees? It is not a criticism. Capitalization and punctuation is something that I struggle with in my short poems. Any words of advice?
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2020
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Thanks for your nice comments about this poem. Regarding punctuation- I still mostly tend to exert normal punctuation in my poetry, by beginning with a capital letter. I noticed other entries did too. I am no expert and it seems that anything goes as far as personal preference. I left off the full stop as a concession to minimal punctuation. Perhaps that is inconsistent of me. Maybe it would look better with lower case for Trees, maybe not.
It looks like we are both struggling together to decide on when to capitalize and punctuate!
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You do what I do then. I call it poetic license, but, on my part, it's really poetic ignorance. I'm not even consistent. I don't like to think about it and decide.
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Yes, I know what you mean - it's hard enough thinking of the words, let alone where those dots and squiggles go.
