The Mirror Ring
This is a Cinderella story with some different twists..4 total reviews
Comment from Goodadvicechan
A lovely Cinderella story. A step mother and a step sister! Why on earth steps are always jealous and bad?
The ring becomes the go-between linking Paul and Anne together. This is a smart way to get the story going.
Good story teller.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2020
A lovely Cinderella story. A step mother and a step sister! Why on earth steps are always jealous and bad?
The ring becomes the go-between linking Paul and Anne together. This is a smart way to get the story going.
Good story teller.
Comment Written 04-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2020
-
Thank you, Goodadvicechan, for your kind comments and feedback. I appreciate it so much that you took the time to read my story and provide feedback. May you have a blessed Christmas.
Comment from Mary Kay Bonfante
Beautifully written updated Cinderella story! I love Anne. Lucinda and Paul are also fascinating characters. You've done a lot with this old-fashioned fairytale, and given it some very creative upgrades.
I found a few minor errors:
"You're important and worthy" Lucinda had said.
-->
"You're important and worthy," Lucinda had said.
It glinted in the light as he kissed her hand. "A perfect fit," her murmured.
-->
It glinted in the light as he kissed her hand. "A perfect fit," he murmured.
His course chest hair underneath his shirt tickled her palms.
-->
His coarse chest hair underneath his shirt tickled her palms.
I enjoyed reading your story very much.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2020
Beautifully written updated Cinderella story! I love Anne. Lucinda and Paul are also fascinating characters. You've done a lot with this old-fashioned fairytale, and given it some very creative upgrades.
I found a few minor errors:
"You're important and worthy" Lucinda had said.
-->
"You're important and worthy," Lucinda had said.
It glinted in the light as he kissed her hand. "A perfect fit," her murmured.
-->
It glinted in the light as he kissed her hand. "A perfect fit," he murmured.
His course chest hair underneath his shirt tickled her palms.
-->
His coarse chest hair underneath his shirt tickled her palms.
I enjoyed reading your story very much.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2020
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2020
-
Hi Mary Kay! Thank you so much for your kind comments and your feedback. I will go and fix those errors immediately. Again, thank you for your comments and taking the time to read my story. May you have a blessed Christmas.
-
You're very welcome. Thank you very much. May you have a blessed Christmas, too. - Mary Kay
Comment from greyson ernst
really good job i may have just joined fanstory but im no noob but i have no recommendation good luck
keep righting stay safe
sincerely Greyson Ernst
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2020
really good job i may have just joined fanstory but im no noob but i have no recommendation good luck
keep righting stay safe
sincerely Greyson Ernst
Comment Written 27-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2020
-
Thanks, greyson ernst, for your comments.
-
no problem would you mind checking out mountain acrostic
Comment from Eternal Muse
This was a very good story. You used great descriptive imagery and visuals. Excellent use if dialogue. Your characters are well defined and real, and u like their interaction.
Thank you so much for sharing it with us.
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2020
This was a very good story. You used great descriptive imagery and visuals. Excellent use if dialogue. Your characters are well defined and real, and u like their interaction.
Thank you so much for sharing it with us.
Comment Written 26-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2020
-
Thank you, Eternal Muse, for your comments and feedback. Thank you for taking the time to read my story.