Reviews from

fragility of life

philosophical contemporary Haiku (life's frail existence)

15 total reviews 
Comment from PoemsOfDD
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Mark, I thought I would have a peek read and see what needs to be bumped over into 'recognised status'. Look what I found. A very philosophical haiku that deserves to be acknowledged. Yes, a thoroughly good read. ~DD

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2021


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2021
    DD!

    I always like to be recognized, especially by FS reviewers familiar with my short style posts. I aspire to write Haiku in the classical style, but often I am lazy and create what I call contemporary or ?observational Haiku.?

    Mark

    THANK YOU!

    Mark
Comment from tempeste
Excellent
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Ciao Marco!

I realised how fragile life was when my mamma died suddenly..

I never though of death prior to her passing ..

We believe to have a control of our lives , we are always planning for tomorrow but like you said in your poem we are like kites tethered by a string ..

A kite is at the mercy of the wind .. which I see as life's trials and tribulations

I'm trying to learn the different 5-7-5 formats ..I think this is a senryu.. you have combined nature ( wind) with us... a human subject and its essence.

Obviously my mamma's death was a blow but over the years what really hurts is that I could have spent the little time we had together better .. she had many talents and I could have learnt so much more from her.

Her favourite mottos were

There is no such thing as
..I CANT DO IT

And

THAT SOMETHING WAS TOO HARD

What ever project she started she finished ..

Of the 44 years we only passed 15 together ( sigh)

PS: this deserves a six but I have eyed another poem which I want to grant a six star vote. ( biggrin)

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 26-Nov-2020
    Ciao Tempeste,

    I am pleased that you give others a six. There are many worthy writers on this site. Thanks for sharing a bit of your personal history. Yes, we can do it!

    Mark
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is so true. I love the comparison of the frailty of life to a kite, with it tethered by one string. Well written, with an exceptional use of the Haiku style of poetry. The final line is a good use of the "aha" moment. A very good choice for the artwork associated with this piece. Wise and thoughtful, this poem says a lot within the confines of a 5-7-5 format.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Take care,
Jesse

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 25-Nov-2020
    Jesse,

    I hope that tenuous string will hold fast during this virus crisis. I really appreciate your support and commentary for my post and how it affected you. My style is predominantly 5-7-5 (-;

    Thanksgiving 2020 will be different for many families. Hopefully you and yours will be safe. Keep healthy.

    Mark
reply by Jesse James Doty on 27-Nov-2020
    Hello Mark.
    Yes, that 5-7-5 format fits you very well. I had a peaceful Thanksgiving and made a list of what I was most thankful for with a close friend. Fan Story made my top 10 list. It was nice to read and review your poem. I hope your Thanksgiving was beneficial and satisfying. Mine certainly was.
    Take care,
    Jesse
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
Excellent
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"fragility of life", is short, succinct and very much to the point. With a minimum of words, this talented poet has told it as it is. Good luck with the contest!

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 26-Nov-2020
    THANKS D of D! Do appreciate your review and stars. As Snoopy says, ?Hang on baby!? Maybe that string will not break during this current virus crisis.

    Mark
reply by duchessofdrumborg on 27-Nov-2020

    Mark,
    as always, your very welcome. If the string breaks then we're undone.
    God bless you, take care and stay safe!
    the Duchess
Comment from Boogienights
Excellent
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Your words have described life to a tee. We need to enjoy ourselves and embrace the time we have on this earth, because it won't last forever. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 26-Nov-2020
    Let?s believe that string will not break during this current virus crisis. Yes, our time on this earth is finite.

    Stay safe. Keep healthy.

    Mark
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
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You are so right here and there is often a thin line between surviving and dying, although we are sometimes given some warning signs before hand, much enjoyed, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 23-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2020
    Thanks Dolly for your comments. Let?s hope that string is a strong one!

    Mark
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

fragility of life
by Mark D. R.

Hello, Mark,

Lovely senryu, it's about human nature.

I like the metaphor...very nice.

Your syllable count is off. You have 18 syllables...6/7/5

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2020
    Gypsy,

    Somehow my brain did not count three syllables in ?existence.? You were only the second reviewer to catch that syllable mistake. While I liked my original, I now have edited and substituted ?frail? in that fist line. Thanks for keeping me honest. I do appreciate your feedback.

    Mark
reply by Gypsy Blue Rose on 23-Nov-2020
    You're welcome:)
Comment from Joanne Gill-Maddick
Excellent
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Beautifully written poem. Life's fragile existence is like a kite in the sky. Tethered by one string. Nicely done. Beautiful photo to go with your words.

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2020
    Thanks Joanne ! Let?s hope that string holds firm for all of us during this pandemic crisis. Stay safe and healthy during this upcoming holiday season.

    Mark
Comment from ESOSTINE
Excellent
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Life is truly fragile and could be lost when that tiny supporting string is cut. We therefore have to make every conscious effort to preserve and enjoy it. A nice piece in few words!

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2020
    Let?s hope that string holds firm during this pandemic crisis as we gather in limited ways with family or friends - whether in person or virtual - for the upcoming holiday season.

    Mark
Comment from roof35
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is an excellent entry for the Haiku contest. Your illustration, of course, pairs perfectly and sets the stage for your words. This is very nicely done.

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2020


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2020
    Judy,

    Thanks for your nice comments for a contest that will actually end next year. I liked it enough that I released it very early. Methinks it has a good message, which apparently you agree with! THANKS.

    Mark