The Spirit of the Wind
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Home Where I Belong"Newylwed homesteader Jane becomes a widow
15 total reviews
Comment from BethShelby
This is a beautiful book you have written with such skill. It is a story of survival and love and spiritual strength. I've enjoyed every bit of it. Life in those day was very hard and your character were strong and faith in God was a large part of that strength.
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2020
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This is a beautiful book you have written with such skill. It is a story of survival and love and spiritual strength. I've enjoyed every bit of it. Life in those day was very hard and your character were strong and faith in God was a large part of that strength.
Comment Written 16-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2020
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Thanks again, Beth
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This fiction speaks about style and mode of living captured in an interesting taletelling, skimmed plot development, realistic and contributory dialogues, good beginning and descriptive ending; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2020
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This fiction speaks about style and mode of living captured in an interesting taletelling, skimmed plot development, realistic and contributory dialogues, good beginning and descriptive ending; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
Comment Written 16-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2020
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Thanks for the detailed observation.
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Masterful narration and bold imagery, esp. snow and ice!
re intro: widower (male) s/b widow for Jane (but her husband is alive!)
to see [that] our family had enough woods s/b wood
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2020
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Masterful narration and bold imagery, esp. snow and ice!
re intro: widower (male) s/b widow for Jane (but her husband is alive!)
to see [that] our family had enough woods s/b wood
Comment Written 16-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2020
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Thanks so much, Elizabeth.
Comment from palmart
Great description of how crude is living in such a cold place like the one you choose! It is a nice vivid expression of feelings inside and outside the character! How cold the outside can be and how deep the effort to continue living (inside) can be! And this ambiguity is just "one step away". Great job!
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reply by the author on 17-Nov-2020
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Great description of how crude is living in such a cold place like the one you choose! It is a nice vivid expression of feelings inside and outside the character! How cold the outside can be and how deep the effort to continue living (inside) can be! And this ambiguity is just "one step away". Great job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2020
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I so appreciate how you found the play of ambiguity between the cold and fire.
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You´re welcome, forestport112!
Have a great week!
Comment from Jay Squires
You have a really engaging writing style. It is easy and flowing, yet tosses out image after image to my reading imagination. Thad was heroic without being schmaltzy. In fact all the characters are well-developed and strong.
Here are a few things to check over:
I'm a tad-bit confused about your background. Is Jane a widow? Then why does she have a husband named Jake? You might want to alter that Background information.
As young widower, Jane [A widower is male; a widow is female= "As young WIDOW, Jane ..."]
It was a sight for swollen eyes. [Ha! I love the adaptation to what would normally be a cliche!
"This land is your land. This land is my land." [I don't know that I would have her say that in exactly those words since it renders to the reader's mind the song, "This Land is Made For You and Me." And it seems like a parody. There are lots of ways you can say the same thing without creating the song's echo.]
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 16-Nov-2020
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You have a really engaging writing style. It is easy and flowing, yet tosses out image after image to my reading imagination. Thad was heroic without being schmaltzy. In fact all the characters are well-developed and strong.
Here are a few things to check over:
I'm a tad-bit confused about your background. Is Jane a widow? Then why does she have a husband named Jake? You might want to alter that Background information.
As young widower, Jane [A widower is male; a widow is female= "As young WIDOW, Jane ..."]
It was a sight for swollen eyes. [Ha! I love the adaptation to what would normally be a cliche!
"This land is your land. This land is my land." [I don't know that I would have her say that in exactly those words since it renders to the reader's mind the song, "This Land is Made For You and Me." And it seems like a parody. There are lots of ways you can say the same thing without creating the song's echo.]
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 16-Nov-2020
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Yes, thanks Jay. I failed to summarize the story. She was widowed early as a homesteader, then Jake came along and tried to win her over. She rebuffed him so soon after her widowhood, then he went off into the civil war with a death wish, only to find she could fall in love with him. Now. If only I could put that in twenty-five words or less. LOL. I so appreciate having your fresh eyes on this story of western survival. Blessings ahead! Thanks, Jay!
