Comment from Michael Ludwinder

Excellent

um.... why was she holding the knife like that? I expected something different. You kinda setup a scene that didn't play out as expected. What's the old saying - if you mention the rifle over the fireplace the rifle better be part of the story at some point. I'm paraphrasing but it's something like that. So what's going on with that knife?

Well I guess you got my interest! Well done and an interesting start to your book.

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2020

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reply by the author on 11-Nov-2020

I was just trying for some misdirection. Thanks for reading.

Comment from robyn corum

Excellent

T.,

So, what took you so long to start a new one? hahaha No moss growing on you, that's for sure. Wow.

Intriguing beginning to these new characters - you're giving us great descriptions of them, their partnership, and lives. Great job!

Notes, if you'll permit:
1.) A (peek) into Andi's life
--> correct the spelling in description

2.) but he did close this browser as well before rising from his chair.
--> delete 'as well'

3.) (its) brown wooden doors currently closed.

Thanks!

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2020

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reply by the author on 11-Nov-2020

Permitted. :) Thanks.