Haiku (Hot Nights)
a 5-7-5 poetic form29 total reviews
Comment from Joan E.
I enjoyed you Classic, 5-7-5 Haiku and the parallel picture. Your use of the alliteration of "r's" is very effective. Best wishes in the contest and Happy Halloween- Joan
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
I enjoyed you Classic, 5-7-5 Haiku and the parallel picture. Your use of the alliteration of "r's" is very effective. Best wishes in the contest and Happy Halloween- Joan
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Hi Joan. Thank you!!
Melissa
Comment from Mistydawn
I am so tired of rain. We had it four days in a row. Of course the 30 degree weather made it seem that much worse. Thank goodness it's sunny today. Your poem is well-written, very descriptive. You paint a vivid picture in the reader's mind.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
I am so tired of rain. We had it four days in a row. Of course the 30 degree weather made it seem that much worse. Thank goodness it's sunny today. Your poem is well-written, very descriptive. You paint a vivid picture in the reader's mind.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Oh Misty, I had forgotten that so many of us in our nation have been dealing with rough and rainy/snowy weather. I was just thinking about the cycle of nature and the way rain falls over and over. I am glad you had sunshine today. Thanks bunches!!
Melissa
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Great entry for my classic haiku contest. Good syllable count and connection between lines. You fulfilled the contest's rules. It has lovely imagery of the nature scene. Good luck!
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
Great entry for my classic haiku contest. Good syllable count and connection between lines. You fulfilled the contest's rules. It has lovely imagery of the nature scene. Good luck!
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Hi Gypsy. Thank you for your wonderful comments, and also, thank you for sponsoring the contest and giving us a chance to write this form. :)
Melissa
Comment from lyenochka
I like the sound of "old rain" - somehow the rain has returned from another life and re-entered the atmosphere as rain when I read that phrase. Beautiful picture and great use of alliteration. I hope you do well in the contest!
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
I like the sound of "old rain" - somehow the rain has returned from another life and re-entered the atmosphere as rain when I read that phrase. Beautiful picture and great use of alliteration. I hope you do well in the contest!
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Hi Helen. Thank you for your lovely comments. Hugs!
Melissa
Comment from Dawn Munro
What a wonderful haiku. The images are easy to visualize, and lovely, and even sound is evoked that sets an ambiance of serenity. This is how haiku should be written, IMO. Your kire connects beautifully, and the kigo is implied.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
What a wonderful haiku. The images are easy to visualize, and lovely, and even sound is evoked that sets an ambiance of serenity. This is how haiku should be written, IMO. Your kire connects beautifully, and the kigo is implied.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Oh, Dawn, what a lovely review and comment. Thank you for sharing the peaceful feelings with me... I thought so too. Hugs, my friend.
Melissa
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You are very welcome.
Comment from Cynthia Adams1
Very nice haiku.
(And it's an actual haiku, which I've learned on this site has to do with nature and not human nature, which would be a senryu poem.)
I particularly like "nature's rhythimic flow;" it says a world in only three words.
If this is for a contest, best of luck. Your poem meets all requirements.
May the Muse find you often. :)
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
Very nice haiku.
(And it's an actual haiku, which I've learned on this site has to do with nature and not human nature, which would be a senryu poem.)
I particularly like "nature's rhythimic flow;" it says a world in only three words.
If this is for a contest, best of luck. Your poem meets all requirements.
May the Muse find you often. :)
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Thank you for your very nice review, Cynthia. I learned the differences between a haiku and Senryu on this site too ~ as well as many other things. :). I have learned so much by taking classes on FanStory and being challenged to stretch and grow. Fun! Thanks again.
Melissa
Comment from judiverse
Lovely artwork choice. Your wording for this Haiku is great. I love gurgling and rivulets. You have some excellent alliteration with the "R" sounds. "Nature's rhythmic flow" is well-stated and thoughtful. It makes you think of how things in nature do go on and on. Best of luck in the Haiku contest. judi
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
Lovely artwork choice. Your wording for this Haiku is great. I love gurgling and rivulets. You have some excellent alliteration with the "R" sounds. "Nature's rhythmic flow" is well-stated and thoughtful. It makes you think of how things in nature do go on and on. Best of luck in the Haiku contest. judi
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Thank you Judi. Always a pleasure to read your comments.
Melissa
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You're very welcome. Haikus are so popular, but I don't try them. judi
Comment from Pantygynt
I like the idea behind the 'revisiting'[ with its hint of the ever evolving water cycle. Whether there is enough 'enlightenment' in the final, satori line, for this to do well in the Classic Haiku contest though, remains to be seen.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
I like the idea behind the 'revisiting'[ with its hint of the ever evolving water cycle. Whether there is enough 'enlightenment' in the final, satori line, for this to do well in the Classic Haiku contest though, remains to be seen.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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I agree... I struggled and changed the satori over and over. My original was... an eternal journey.. but wanted to highlight the cycle of life. I guess we will see when the voting starts. :). Thanks so much, Jim.
Melissa
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I agree... I struggled and changed the satori over and over. My original was... an eternal journey.. but wanted to highlight the cycle of life. I guess we will see when the voting starts. :). Thanks so much, Jim.
Melissa
Comment from Janice Canerdy
You have made excellent use of your seventeen syllables in this descriptive piece about nature's amazing examples of recycling. I like the r-word alliteration.
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
You have made excellent use of your seventeen syllables in this descriptive piece about nature's amazing examples of recycling. I like the r-word alliteration.
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Thank you very much Janice!
Melissa
Comment from juliaSjames
Dear Melissa
I love the sound and sights of your haiku. And the subtle personification of "old rain".
Nice carryover of the water theme into the satori line. We're all subject to natural laws in the rhythm of the human life cycle and the continual dance of earth's seasons.
A beautiful and thoughtful write enhanced by the fine artwork.
Good luck in the contest.
Stay safe and blessed
Julia
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
Dear Melissa
I love the sound and sights of your haiku. And the subtle personification of "old rain".
Nice carryover of the water theme into the satori line. We're all subject to natural laws in the rhythm of the human life cycle and the continual dance of earth's seasons.
A beautiful and thoughtful write enhanced by the fine artwork.
Good luck in the contest.
Stay safe and blessed
Julia
Comment Written 31-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 31-Oct-2020
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Hello Julia. Thank you, my friend. It seemed I could just hear that water flowing as I looked at that photo. :). Much appreciated.
Melissa