Wilderness Redemption Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Into the Storm"Shenanigans on the frontier
16 total reviews
Comment from royowen
I'm surprised they let the fellows cross the river with all those rifles, probably to arm those Indians with them. But the advent of their visitors at Ezra's place, has placed some interest in the story. Well dine Earl, good writing my friend, blessings Roy
Typo : (the) used the crook...he? 2: Clancy said, (admirably) admiringly?
3 : unlimbered (his) and nocked an arrow.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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I'm surprised they let the fellows cross the river with all those rifles, probably to arm those Indians with them. But the advent of their visitors at Ezra's place, has placed some interest in the story. Well dine Earl, good writing my friend, blessings Roy
Typo : (the) used the crook...he? 2: Clancy said, (admirably) admiringly?
3 : unlimbered (his) and nocked an arrow.
Comment Written 30-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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Thank you very much Roy. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work. You stay safe and stay healthy.
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Well done Earl
Comment from nancy_e_davis
I love the frontier vernacular, Earl. I do wish you would post more often but I know it is hard to do sometimes. Worse for a poet. LOL I enjoyed the chapter and look forward to the nest. I didn't see anything needin fixin. LOL Good Job. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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I love the frontier vernacular, Earl. I do wish you would post more often but I know it is hard to do sometimes. Worse for a poet. LOL I enjoyed the chapter and look forward to the nest. I didn't see anything needin fixin. LOL Good Job. Nancy:)
Comment Written 30-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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Thank you very much Nancy. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work. You stay safe and stay healthy.
Comment from joycetreasures
Hello Earl,
This is my first tine reading one of of your chapters. That's some frontier vernacular language!! This is a great story of the life on the frontier with all those wilderness characters. Honestly, this was an interesting and an enjoyable read. Granny is really a interesting character. Don't accuse her of killing someone! I love historical fiction. Great title, "Into the storm." Your characters seem, so real in your story. I like it. I think you wrote a nice chapter about redemption in the wilderness. Also. I like the photo you used to reflect your message. Well done. I like to continue to follow your story. Keep writing these great chapters. Stay safe.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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Hello Earl,
This is my first tine reading one of of your chapters. That's some frontier vernacular language!! This is a great story of the life on the frontier with all those wilderness characters. Honestly, this was an interesting and an enjoyable read. Granny is really a interesting character. Don't accuse her of killing someone! I love historical fiction. Great title, "Into the storm." Your characters seem, so real in your story. I like it. I think you wrote a nice chapter about redemption in the wilderness. Also. I like the photo you used to reflect your message. Well done. I like to continue to follow your story. Keep writing these great chapters. Stay safe.
Comment Written 30-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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Thank you very much. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work. You stay safe and stay healthy.
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You are so welcome.
Comment from Ben Colder
Good one Earl. I suspect the Aussie will tare you up with the Frontier gab. Glad to see someone else writing historical fiction.
Sorry not to have a six. It deserves one.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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Good one Earl. I suspect the Aussie will tare you up with the Frontier gab. Glad to see someone else writing historical fiction.
Sorry not to have a six. It deserves one.
Comment Written 30-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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Thank you very much Ben, I appreciate the virtual six. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work. You stay safe and stay healthy.
Comment from Mastery
hi Earl Doggone it, you always seem to post your chapters late in the week and by then all of my sixes are gone. Best to post on Sundy or monday if possible.
Now for the review; Your plot holds up and the imagery carries it very well, like here, for instance: "Ezra then turned on his heel and headed for the springhouse. He went down the steps and entered through the open doorway. Within seconds he reemerged toting a brown crock jug. He blew the dust off of the bottle, uncorked it with his teeth, the used the crook of his elbow to tilt the jug for a drink."
Good dialogue too.
Suggestion: In order to eliminate the overuse of pronouns, begin your sentences a bit different each time where possible. for instance, you have:
"Roseanna had gotten a faraway look in her eyes. She was back there again. She jumped when Caleb nudged her."
"Roseanna had gotten a faraway look in her eyes. She was back there again. When Caleb nudged her she jumped." jumped when Caleb nudged her.
May not seem too important Earl, but it's the little things like this that polish your writing. Bob
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2020
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hi Earl Doggone it, you always seem to post your chapters late in the week and by then all of my sixes are gone. Best to post on Sundy or monday if possible.
Now for the review; Your plot holds up and the imagery carries it very well, like here, for instance: "Ezra then turned on his heel and headed for the springhouse. He went down the steps and entered through the open doorway. Within seconds he reemerged toting a brown crock jug. He blew the dust off of the bottle, uncorked it with his teeth, the used the crook of his elbow to tilt the jug for a drink."
Good dialogue too.
Suggestion: In order to eliminate the overuse of pronouns, begin your sentences a bit different each time where possible. for instance, you have:
"Roseanna had gotten a faraway look in her eyes. She was back there again. She jumped when Caleb nudged her."
"Roseanna had gotten a faraway look in her eyes. She was back there again. When Caleb nudged her she jumped." jumped when Caleb nudged her.
May not seem too important Earl, but it's the little things like this that polish your writing. Bob
Comment Written 30-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2020
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Bob a virtual six from you is better than a real one from anyone else. You are probably the author I respect on this site the most. I know you have improved my writing 100% over the past two years and I look forward to more help from you.
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Anytime, my friend. Glad to help a good writer get better hopefully. :) Bob
Comment from Seshadri_Sreenivasan
Frankly, it took some time for me to understand the frontier language.I am new to this site and have missed the earlier chapters. But reading so many genres of writing is an experience by itself. Thanks for sharing!
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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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Frankly, it took some time for me to understand the frontier language.I am new to this site and have missed the earlier chapters. But reading so many genres of writing is an experience by itself. Thanks for sharing!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2020
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Thank you very much. I appreciate you reading and reviewing my work. You stay safe and stay healthy.
