Reviews from

Scene at a Diner 4

a Pons and Ned script

17 total reviews 
Comment from Mary Vigasin
Excellent
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I love the play on words with this motley crew. "A forked tongue!" and "Holly Toledo"
What also I loved is the date who ate like the last day before a famine. Love that line and then they went to lunch.
Truly enjoyed the lunch at the diner.
Regards,
Mary

 Comment Written 24-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 24-Oct-2020
    Thanks, Mary
Comment from Mastery
Excellent
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This scene continues to entertain, bill.

I liked some of these witty lines, like:
"Ned: Yeah, I heard she eats like it's the last day before a famine.

And:"d: Hey fellers. If I had a ferk in my tongue, what do I got?
Fed: A forked tongue?
Hed: An eating disorder?"

You shouldn't end it. LOL Bob
:

"

 Comment Written 24-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 24-Oct-2020
    Thanks, Bob
Comment from nomi338
Excellent
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Erk alert. All of a sudden, this story is starting to make my stomach quiver. I am definitely starting to suffer some sort of trauma in the region of my belly that reacts to some awfully distasteful substance being fed into my gastric area. Excuse me while I barf.

 Comment Written 24-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 24-Oct-2020
    Was it the mince tarts?
reply by nomi338 on 24-Oct-2020
    Umm, could be. I'm not sure. It might have been something I heard rather than something I ate. Maybe even something I saw in my mind..
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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"I think Afghanistan is still open" quips Hed, and it brings a chuckle from all. Our bright heroes are at it again. I love the offpitch conversations, and great banter between. You have an ability to entertain uniquely, well done, blessings Bill, well done, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 24-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 24-Oct-2020
    Thanks, Roy.
reply by royowen on 24-Oct-2020
    Welcome Bill
Comment from Jeffrey Ford
Excellent
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I think that you wrote a great script. It is very creative how you tied in the food with dating. The characters are very engaging and have great chemistry. Great script and thank you for sharing!

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 Comment Written 24-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 24-Oct-2020
    Thanks, Jeffrey
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This script is so realistically drafted; I enjoyed the scene it has good sense of humour and simple but dominating, interesting role playing directives realistic; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR

 Comment Written 24-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 24-Oct-2020
    Thanks, ALD, for the exceptional review. Bill
Comment from robyn corum
Excellent
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Bill,

I realize part of the fun for the readers is watching you work, pouring out your own brand of brilliance to dazzle us. But it occurs to me this time to wonder how many of our characters followed the whole convo. Ha

I also understand that these men are more than they appear to be and are highly trained in military prowess and more. Hmmm. Keeps things interesting!

Thank you!

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 Comment Written 24-Oct-2020


reply by the author on 24-Oct-2020
    Thank you for following the boys, Robyn.