The future
Future in disguise19 total reviews
Comment from Suzanna Ray
Dear Iza, this essay is very scary and very apt to happen if we keep going the way the devil is leading us with Promises that will ensure our entrapment in a system that has proven time and time again to lead to an oligarchy or dictatorship of men like Hitler or Kim Dae Jung, who will do anything to ensure they stay in power.
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Dear Iza, this essay is very scary and very apt to happen if we keep going the way the devil is leading us with Promises that will ensure our entrapment in a system that has proven time and time again to lead to an oligarchy or dictatorship of men like Hitler or Kim Dae Jung, who will do anything to ensure they stay in power.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2020
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written disguise flash fiction. The advertisement for hell is always inviting and friendly until you buy a ticket and go there to find it is the opposite of the promises from the advert.
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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A very well-written disguise flash fiction. The advertisement for hell is always inviting and friendly until you buy a ticket and go there to find it is the opposite of the promises from the advert.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Thank you so much for your beautiful review.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Socialism is more restrictive than Capitalism and trying the equalise a society is very wrong in my opinion, everyone is different and has different aspirations you cannot make everyone the same by using government to do it. Your words here are poignant, I enjoyed your political post, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Socialism is more restrictive than Capitalism and trying the equalise a society is very wrong in my opinion, everyone is different and has different aspirations you cannot make everyone the same by using government to do it. Your words here are poignant, I enjoyed your political post, love Dolly x
Comment Written 26-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Amen to that sister:)
Comment from Liz O'Neill
I like how you have kept the reader in mystery as to who delivered the diatribe. There may have been some politically alert readers who could anticipate who it was. By collecting the clues, historically some could figure it out. This was clever.
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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I like how you have kept the reader in mystery as to who delivered the diatribe. There may have been some politically alert readers who could anticipate who it was. By collecting the clues, historically some could figure it out. This was clever.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Thank you so much, your review it's uplifting.
Comment from Patty Palmer
Extremely impressive! It makes me stop and think about what's going on in our world. (which I assume you wanted others to do) Everyone needs to be on their toes! We have an election that needs every single one of us to vote. It's a big worry about what is going to become of us after this election. Great job! Good luck with the contest!
Patty
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Extremely impressive! It makes me stop and think about what's going on in our world. (which I assume you wanted others to do) Everyone needs to be on their toes! We have an election that needs every single one of us to vote. It's a big worry about what is going to become of us after this election. Great job! Good luck with the contest!
Patty
Comment Written 25-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Thank you so much, Ms. Patty, you got my worries so well:)
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
This is a great entry with a surprise ending for the Disguised writing prompt. It should do well in the contest. I wish you the best of good luck!
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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This is a great entry with a surprise ending for the Disguised writing prompt. It should do well in the contest. I wish you the best of good luck!
Comment Written 25-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Thank you:)
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello anonymous
Interesting entry for the Disguised writing prompt contest. You did an okay job with the plot, and predictive ending. Good luck in the contest.
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reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Hello anonymous
Interesting entry for the Disguised writing prompt contest. You did an okay job with the plot, and predictive ending. Good luck in the contest.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Thank you:)
Comment from Monica Chaddick
This is a very chilling piece, to say the least. Probably because it has a breath of truth in it. I noticed a couple of things -
after Fools - I think there should be a comma
stupid Leader - leader shouldn't be capitalized
I sstopped and dropped - should only have one s
Don't mean to nitpick - sorry. It is a very well-written piece. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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This is a very chilling piece, to say the least. Probably because it has a breath of truth in it. I noticed a couple of things -
after Fools - I think there should be a comma
stupid Leader - leader shouldn't be capitalized
I sstopped and dropped - should only have one s
Don't mean to nitpick - sorry. It is a very well-written piece. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Hi Monica, thank you so much for your review and the grammar corrections:)
Comment from Jasmine Girl
I came from China so I really like this piece and know what you mean about the socialism and how imperfect it could be. I have been here for 35 years and love it.
If you are talking about the election here, both candidates have been bought out by Wall Street. No danger here. Goldman Sacks supports Biden.
Here is a typo in the second from the last line.
I sstopped
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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I came from China so I really like this piece and know what you mean about the socialism and how imperfect it could be. I have been here for 35 years and love it.
If you are talking about the election here, both candidates have been bought out by Wall Street. No danger here. Goldman Sacks supports Biden.
Here is a typo in the second from the last line.
I sstopped
Comment Written 24-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2020
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Thank you so much, Ms. Lisa:)
Comment from lancellot
Very interesting. But it seems at times you skip placing spaces between the different speakers. This does cause some confusion.
ex:
"Dark? Well my friend dark is the new order! I am your future. Take a good luck at me, I am your socialism in disguise! Your stupid leaders for the sake of eternal power, they offered you to me. Rejoice this will be your last protest, you stupid people! Once I'm in power, you will do as I say. Freedom? You will have it just in your dreams!"
"Who are you?"
I sstopped and dropped my disguise. They gasped: "You are Kim?"
"No! Idiots, I am Xi Jinping short for ... King!"
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Very interesting. But it seems at times you skip placing spaces between the different speakers. This does cause some confusion.
ex:
"Dark? Well my friend dark is the new order! I am your future. Take a good luck at me, I am your socialism in disguise! Your stupid leaders for the sake of eternal power, they offered you to me. Rejoice this will be your last protest, you stupid people! Once I'm in power, you will do as I say. Freedom? You will have it just in your dreams!"
"Who are you?"
I sstopped and dropped my disguise. They gasped: "You are Kim?"
"No! Idiots, I am Xi Jinping short for ... King!"
Comment Written 24-Oct-2020
