Golden Country
Nonet31 total reviews
Comment from juliaSjames
This is a beautiful poem in perfect nonet form.
Spectacular flow.
Nostalgia gilds the canvas of memories. Perhaps it's for the best that we can't go back and be disappointed.
Like the way the final word, "ghosts" directs the reader's attention to the "Dancing shadows' of the first line.
I'm not a fan of archaisms. But in this write, I keep on reading the eighth line as "O ye".
Best of luck in the contest, Steve.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
This is a beautiful poem in perfect nonet form.
Spectacular flow.
Nostalgia gilds the canvas of memories. Perhaps it's for the best that we can't go back and be disappointed.
Like the way the final word, "ghosts" directs the reader's attention to the "Dancing shadows' of the first line.
I'm not a fan of archaisms. But in this write, I keep on reading the eighth line as "O ye".
Best of luck in the contest, Steve.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Julia.
Just trying something different - not really a big fan of this form - perhaps it shows in the lack-lustre reviews (not yours!)
Steve
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Lots of emotion hidden in your lines, longing to know more about the past.I love the line, "ragged memories edge" very good! They haunt you like ghosts from the past. Your sullable count is perfect. Love the art! Good luck in the contest. Nancy
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
Lots of emotion hidden in your lines, longing to know more about the past.I love the line, "ragged memories edge" very good! They haunt you like ghosts from the past. Your sullable count is perfect. Love the art! Good luck in the contest. Nancy
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks for the kind words, Nancy.
Steve
Comment from trimple
Hello there Steve
A great entry to the nonet competition.
Your poem reads soulful, and you have managed to conjure up a sense of longing in few words. I think Mr Hartley would have been proud of this one.
'Dancing shadows they flee before me'-- Great stuff!
kindest regards
trimple:)
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
Hello there Steve
A great entry to the nonet competition.
Your poem reads soulful, and you have managed to conjure up a sense of longing in few words. I think Mr Hartley would have been proud of this one.
'Dancing shadows they flee before me'-- Great stuff!
kindest regards
trimple:)
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Tracey.
Steve
Comment from closetpoetjester
Well your ragged memory scrubbed up okay for this one Steve as you cried for the spirits of old to take you back to a time you loved. I'm not familiar with the novel you mentioned but I get a feeling your embracing a bit of nostalgia here. The dancing shadows of a golden country it seems will haunt your forever more...until you return, of course Haha. Very nicely penned Steve.
Cheers P
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
Well your ragged memory scrubbed up okay for this one Steve as you cried for the spirits of old to take you back to a time you loved. I'm not familiar with the novel you mentioned but I get a feeling your embracing a bit of nostalgia here. The dancing shadows of a golden country it seems will haunt your forever more...until you return, of course Haha. Very nicely penned Steve.
Cheers P
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Just got to find a time machine - reckon I could do a bit better second time around - not to mention buying up lots of Microsoft shares....
Steve
Comment from N.K. Wagner
The golden country of memory, where everything is seen through a haze of fond remembrance. I suspect that's what you have in mind here. Beautifully worded. Wish the words could have been superimposed on the sky. What a lovely picture. :) Nancy
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
The golden country of memory, where everything is seen through a haze of fond remembrance. I suspect that's what you have in mind here. Beautifully worded. Wish the words could have been superimposed on the sky. What a lovely picture. :) Nancy
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Nancy - that's not actually what I started out to write, but it is what emerged! Bloody poems take on a life of their own.
Steve
Comment from strandregs
Hi Steve
Yes it does (as if you had a doubt) make sense after I read it five time.
Nice write.
ragged memory's edge -nice.Z.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
Hi Steve
Yes it does (as if you had a doubt) make sense after I read it five time.
Nice write.
ragged memory's edge -nice.Z.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks for the kind words.
Steve
Comment from Dean Kuch
Nice, kiwistevh. A nonet with an eerie, ethereal feel to it. Right up my particular alley.
You've left this open to interpretation, and I am to interpretation as one who craves all things sour is to a lemon. I love the stimulation, but I really suck at it.
So let me just say that I liked the essence of this, and your presentation was fantastic.
Nice work.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
Nice, kiwistevh. A nonet with an eerie, ethereal feel to it. Right up my particular alley.
You've left this open to interpretation, and I am to interpretation as one who craves all things sour is to a lemon. I love the stimulation, but I really suck at it.
So let me just say that I liked the essence of this, and your presentation was fantastic.
Nice work.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Dean.
You live up an eerie, ethereal alley??
Steve
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Yes, haven't you noticed? No, you rarely read my work, so you probably haven't, lol.
Comment from marycec
This is a haunting nonet . You have captured that dream crossed twilight between sleep and wakefulness beautifully..I particularly liked 'teasing ragged memory's edge'.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
This is a haunting nonet . You have captured that dream crossed twilight between sleep and wakefulness beautifully..I particularly liked 'teasing ragged memory's edge'.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Mary, thanks for the kind words.
Steve
Comment from the blue pixel
You are so good with words Steve. As I read them I can experience what I think you mean. Our memories are notoriously "ragged" as you put it, inaccurate and shadowy though how often do we swear we are absolutely spot on? It's not too often that a centred Nonet makes a perfect inverted triangle but yours is as close as it gets and presents beautifully. Good luck in the contest. You certainly give these things a right royal try and you deserve all the wins, and more, that you can get. xx Carol
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
You are so good with words Steve. As I read them I can experience what I think you mean. Our memories are notoriously "ragged" as you put it, inaccurate and shadowy though how often do we swear we are absolutely spot on? It's not too often that a centred Nonet makes a perfect inverted triangle but yours is as close as it gets and presents beautifully. Good luck in the contest. You certainly give these things a right royal try and you deserve all the wins, and more, that you can get. xx Carol
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Carol.
I have had my share of wins lately, but doubt if this will be one of them - reviews have been lukewarm. Still, you never know what the judges will decide....
Steve
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In my very limited and very past experience, reviews and votes are entirely different beasts and if memory serves me correctly, when my reviews weren't great, my votes were better and vice versa. My fingers are crossed for you. xx Carol
Comment from adewpearl
stunning artwork to illustrate your poem, which is in excellent syllable count for the nonet
excellent use of enjambment to keep thought flowing from line to line
good consonance in half forgotten
soulful expression of emotion
Brooke
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
stunning artwork to illustrate your poem, which is in excellent syllable count for the nonet
excellent use of enjambment to keep thought flowing from line to line
good consonance in half forgotten
soulful expression of emotion
Brooke
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks, Brooke.
Steve