My Book of Poems 2010-2017
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "Down the Rabbit Hole"a collection of my poetry
94 total reviews
Comment from Joy Graham
Your title and picture set the mood beautifully for your message. This is a fine cinquain which has fine syllable count in each line. Your message will resonate wih many readers that struggle with depression. It's good to reach out through poetry to help our fellow friends. Poetry is an excellent tool to reach people beyond our circle of family and friends.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
Your title and picture set the mood beautifully for your message. This is a fine cinquain which has fine syllable count in each line. Your message will resonate wih many readers that struggle with depression. It's good to reach out through poetry to help our fellow friends. Poetry is an excellent tool to reach people beyond our circle of family and friends.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
Hi Joy; thank you for the lovely review and kind words. Your encouragement means a great deal to me,
~patty~
Comment from bmethner
So beautiful. So sad. The artwork draws you down like the words of the poem. Beautifully linked. It is amazing that the few words can plung you so deploy. Excellent job
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
So beautiful. So sad. The artwork draws you down like the words of the poem. Beautifully linked. It is amazing that the few words can plung you so deploy. Excellent job
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
thank you SO much for this lovely review. This poem was written from the depths of a depression. Writing it helped to bring me out of it, and I was able to reflect on the light instead of the darkness,
~patty~
ps; thank you for the lovely sixth star
-
You are welcome. What a wonderful therapist writing is
Comment from MelB
Hi Patty, very nice imagery and description. Excellent line and syllable count. The artwork does give a sense of darkness and spiraling out of control.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
Hi Patty, very nice imagery and description. Excellent line and syllable count. The artwork does give a sense of darkness and spiraling out of control.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
Hi Mel; thank you so much for the lovely review. I appreciate your kind words of encouragement,
~patty~
-
You're welcome.
Comment from Celtic Angel
I enjoyed your poem--its subject, its imagery, and the apropos pattern. It take the reader on a spiraling journey into the darkness. Perfect accompanying artwork! This poem achieves the mood and tone intended on the trip down the rabbit hole.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
I enjoyed your poem--its subject, its imagery, and the apropos pattern. It take the reader on a spiraling journey into the darkness. Perfect accompanying artwork! This poem achieves the mood and tone intended on the trip down the rabbit hole.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful review,
~patty~
Comment from Misternubcakes
I am quite speechless.
I am in LOVE. The poetic choice of words match perfectly with the Chinquain guideline.
This is poem is very deep, dark, and just true.
I love the image chosen as well. In those very dark moments, humans tend to only look upon the dark rooms within their chambers near their heart and poison it with doubt and negativity. There are only the few thousands that can overcome their own prejudices... so I do agree with the poem. It is just really good.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
I am quite speechless.
I am in LOVE. The poetic choice of words match perfectly with the Chinquain guideline.
This is poem is very deep, dark, and just true.
I love the image chosen as well. In those very dark moments, humans tend to only look upon the dark rooms within their chambers near their heart and poison it with doubt and negativity. There are only the few thousands that can overcome their own prejudices... so I do agree with the poem. It is just really good.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
thank you so much for reading and the lovely review. I'm glad you were able to see so much within the words of the poem,
~patty~
Comment from Margaret Ford
This is very good use of the cinquain form, with your description of descent matching the downward movement of a readers eyes, and with your words growing more intense with each line. This has been very cleverly thought through. Excellent work. Margaret
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
This is very good use of the cinquain form, with your description of descent matching the downward movement of a readers eyes, and with your words growing more intense with each line. This has been very cleverly thought through. Excellent work. Margaret
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
Hi Margaret; thank you for reading and the lovely review. I appreciate your encouraging words,
~patty~
Comment from Oatmeal
MPatty,
This poem was arranged very well. The theme was well thought out. The theme flowed well all through your poem. The line count is correct. Telling things very plainly and comprehensibly.
There was no SPAG. No typos. No homophones. No problems at all.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
MPatty,
This poem was arranged very well. The theme was well thought out. The theme flowed well all through your poem. The line count is correct. Telling things very plainly and comprehensibly.
There was no SPAG. No typos. No homophones. No problems at all.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
Hi Camille; thank you so much for reading and reviewing. I'm glad you enjoyed the poem and concept,
~patty~
Comment from Janet Foor
Down the Rabbit Hole is an excellent cinquain poem Patty with perfect artwork to accompany this piece. Despair is an ugly feeling and you have captured the essence of that feeling.
Well done
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
Down the Rabbit Hole is an excellent cinquain poem Patty with perfect artwork to accompany this piece. Despair is an ugly feeling and you have captured the essence of that feeling.
Well done
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
Hi Janet; thank you so much for the lovely review of this piece. I found it very therapeutic to write from the depths of the depression. It helped me to deal with things and bring myself up,
~patty~
-
Writing is an excellent way to cope and bring oneself back from depression.
I happy it works for you too.
Janet
Comment from Auto-Manic
Dark, dream-like, I can imagine how this might relate to a coma or maybe even dark depression...no light at the end of this tunnel. Free fall without end just a cosmic black hole. Whew.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
Dark, dream-like, I can imagine how this might relate to a coma or maybe even dark depression...no light at the end of this tunnel. Free fall without end just a cosmic black hole. Whew.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
thank you for your thoughtful review. This is about a dark depression. I suffer from them off and on. I just came out of a doozy,
~patty~
Comment from pome lover
Am guessing this is possibly feelings of long ago?
It is spooky to me because although my childhood was fine, I used to have a recurring nightmare that I was running home across a broad stretch of thatchy grass and a claw would reach up and grab my foot and pull me down into a hole. This went on for quite a long time, but I never said anything about it. I don't remember why I didn't, but I still remember the horror of it. Brrrr. Hadn't thought of that in years. Your descriptive words did the trick! :)
pome lover
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
Am guessing this is possibly feelings of long ago?
It is spooky to me because although my childhood was fine, I used to have a recurring nightmare that I was running home across a broad stretch of thatchy grass and a claw would reach up and grab my foot and pull me down into a hole. This went on for quite a long time, but I never said anything about it. I don't remember why I didn't, but I still remember the horror of it. Brrrr. Hadn't thought of that in years. Your descriptive words did the trick! :)
pome lover
Comment Written 28-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017
-
hi there; unfortunately, this is the words of my depression speaking. I am bipolar and often suffer from extreme depressions and it is very dark indeed. I'm doing much better now - writing is very therapeutic,
~patty~
-
I'm glad you're doing better and writing helps.
PL