2017 JAPANESE POETRY
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "haiku (after harvest)"A collection of Japanese poetry
24 total reviews
Comment from Grasshopper2
GBR,
Your word choice offers a dark, macabre feeling...ominous. It works well with your choice of photo, particularly as it isB&W. Your alliteration of D is sweet, rolls off the tongue. Well done, Lady Blue.
Michael
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2017
GBR,
Your word choice offers a dark, macabre feeling...ominous. It works well with your choice of photo, particularly as it isB&W. Your alliteration of D is sweet, rolls off the tongue. Well done, Lady Blue.
Michael
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2017
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3!!!! wow, thank you so much,
gypsy
Comment from Mustang Patty
thank you for sharing this haiku about the end of a season. I can remember always feeling sad when I saw the fallow fields on my aunt's farm. It felt like the soil was naked. As I grew up, I was relieved to learn that the soil needed the rest, and I felt better about it. Your presentation of this piece took me back to old memories, and revealed the beauty of the earth rejuvenating itself,
~patty~
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
thank you for sharing this haiku about the end of a season. I can remember always feeling sad when I saw the fallow fields on my aunt's farm. It felt like the soil was naked. As I grew up, I was relieved to learn that the soil needed the rest, and I felt better about it. Your presentation of this piece took me back to old memories, and revealed the beauty of the earth rejuvenating itself,
~patty~
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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Thank you very much for reading, my friend :) I am so glad this haiku brought some good memories.
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and Poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>Haiga class starts on May 1st <>
Comment from MizKat
Hi Gypsy,
You have written a very nice poem.
I really enjoyed reading it too.
Thanks very much for sharing.
I have to get off here though as my right hand is bothering me again.
Kat
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
Hi Gypsy,
You have written a very nice poem.
I really enjoyed reading it too.
Thanks very much for sharing.
I have to get off here though as my right hand is bothering me again.
Kat
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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thank you
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You are very welcome, Gypsy. Kat
Comment from Douglas Paul
Very good descriptive and clear imagery in your fist two lines and a good satori. I like the black and white picture for this one. Well done, my friend. Hope all is well. See you tonight
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
Very good descriptive and clear imagery in your fist two lines and a good satori. I like the black and white picture for this one. Well done, my friend. Hope all is well. See you tonight
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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Thank you, honey, I will see you tonight,
God bless you,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and Poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>Haiga class starts on May 1st <>
Comment from Ric Myworld
Thanks for sharing another fine poem. These words and the picture paint a vision at a time we seldom see, long after the workers are gone. Coyotes yipping in the background, a desperate cry of pain, and then all is quiet as darkness settles in. Great job. :-)
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
Thanks for sharing another fine poem. These words and the picture paint a vision at a time we seldom see, long after the workers are gone. Coyotes yipping in the background, a desperate cry of pain, and then all is quiet as darkness settles in. Great job. :-)
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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Thank you very much for reading, my friend :)
take care,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and Poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>Haiga class starts on May 1st <>
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Yes my friend this is well written again you have so much imagery to me doesn't need a picture that is just a bonus well done regards Jill
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
Yes my friend this is well written again you have so much imagery to me doesn't need a picture that is just a bonus well done regards Jill
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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Thank you very much for reading, my friend :) yeah, I do the picture because it's fun to me.
take care,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and Poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>Haiga class starts on May 1st <>
Comment from Rasmine
Awesome! I need to look at the haiku challenge--oh wait you guys are taking a break. I'll look anyhow Gypsy. I'm waiting for the illustrator to draw the picture for my next adventure in Flower Power--need something to write LOL!
Have a great week!!
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
Awesome! I need to look at the haiku challenge--oh wait you guys are taking a break. I'll look anyhow Gypsy. I'm waiting for the illustrator to draw the picture for my next adventure in Flower Power--need something to write LOL!
Have a great week!!
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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Thank you very much for reading, my friend :)
take care,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and Poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>Haiga class starts on May 1st <>
Comment from royowen
In The Mosaic law, a field lay fallow for a year,after producing for seven years it was called a sabbath year, it rejuvenated in that year, people pollute the land by fertilisation, not allowing the land to rest. So well done Gypsy, nicely produced haiku, well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
In The Mosaic law, a field lay fallow for a year,after producing for seven years it was called a sabbath year, it rejuvenated in that year, people pollute the land by fertilisation, not allowing the land to rest. So well done Gypsy, nicely produced haiku, well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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Thank you very much for reading, my friend :)
take care,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and Poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>Haiga class starts on May 1st <>
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Well done
Comment from DR DIP
Where's the kigo in this haiku Gypsy lol What season is this? I suppose after harvest is the season hey?
Nice Haiku as always. I am starting to come around.
15 syllables : check
After the harvest: season check
Picture has relevance: check
Haiku is well written: check
Yep with a bit more practice you will master these lol
xxxdip
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
Where's the kigo in this haiku Gypsy lol What season is this? I suppose after harvest is the season hey?
Nice Haiku as always. I am starting to come around.
15 syllables : check
After the harvest: season check
Picture has relevance: check
Haiku is well written: check
Yep with a bit more practice you will master these lol
xxxdip
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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LOL look at you, you remembered the review tips... good for you, honey. Harvest is a keyword for autumn. Japanese have dictionaries that have hundreds of keywords. You can say autumn or be more subtle with harvest or chill wind or leaves changing color, etc... I use this link = http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/500ESWd.html#NEW%20YEAR
Thank you very much :)
Comment from Sis Cat
Yes, yes, yes, Gypsy, and you get my last six star review of the week. I love the desolate, late fall imagery of your haiku:
after harvest,
daylight drips away as dark creeps --
fallow fields
fallow fields is a kigo for autumn. You have an effective use of D alliteration in the second line and F alliteration in the third. I feel daylight dripping away as winter approaches.
Thank you for sharing your most fine and refined haiku.
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
Yes, yes, yes, Gypsy, and you get my last six star review of the week. I love the desolate, late fall imagery of your haiku:
after harvest,
daylight drips away as dark creeps --
fallow fields
fallow fields is a kigo for autumn. You have an effective use of D alliteration in the second line and F alliteration in the third. I feel daylight dripping away as winter approaches.
Thank you for sharing your most fine and refined haiku.
Comment Written 24-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
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Thank you very much for the stellar review and six stars, you are very kind and generous. :)
Gypsy