Prosetry
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Nonnet---Going Home"Story telling poems
25 total reviews
Comment from I am Cat
This is sad, Judy... I'm so sorry you've lost your mother if this is biographical.
One note, it's a nonet, not a nonnet. ;) (pronounced the same, though, evidently. But I pronounced it nonet, like Monet... (because I can!) lol
At any rate, your syllable counts are spot on, except where you meet the two, you're supposed to make sure you end with one syllable, and then, when you start again with another nonet, you start with one syllable also... so that you start over again, not join the two with the same line. See what I mean? so this is a nonet, reverse nonet syllable counts 9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1, 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 ;)
Well done with a lot of feeling in it. It tugged at my heartstrings.
Hugs to you
Cat
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
This is sad, Judy... I'm so sorry you've lost your mother if this is biographical.
One note, it's a nonet, not a nonnet. ;) (pronounced the same, though, evidently. But I pronounced it nonet, like Monet... (because I can!) lol
At any rate, your syllable counts are spot on, except where you meet the two, you're supposed to make sure you end with one syllable, and then, when you start again with another nonet, you start with one syllable also... so that you start over again, not join the two with the same line. See what I mean? so this is a nonet, reverse nonet syllable counts 9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1, 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 ;)
Well done with a lot of feeling in it. It tugged at my heartstrings.
Hugs to you
Cat
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016
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Thank you so much. Yes She died several years ago but I vividly remember having to clean out her house. It is a job of love and healing. I really appreciate your explaining that I should have had one more syllable.
Comment from JennaG
Your poem truly touched my heart. It reminded me of clearing out my grandma's home after she died. My favorite line has to be the last, "Empty chair wondering where she is". That one really tugged at my heartstrings. I love the clever angle you took with the topic of home. It was creative and unique and left a lasting impression. Beautifully written! Thank you for sharing. :)
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
Your poem truly touched my heart. It reminded me of clearing out my grandma's home after she died. My favorite line has to be the last, "Empty chair wondering where she is". That one really tugged at my heartstrings. I love the clever angle you took with the topic of home. It was creative and unique and left a lasting impression. Beautifully written! Thank you for sharing. :)
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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thank you Jenna, Even when you know its time for a parent to go on it is never easy. It also is a special time that brings healing when you have to clean out their house.
Comment from Dawn Munro
You did amazing things with this form for your first time out - a mirror nonet telling such a sorrowful tale and in such a way as to evoke so much imagery, not the least of which is the sense of smell, the most powerful of our senses. So sad.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
You did amazing things with this form for your first time out - a mirror nonet telling such a sorrowful tale and in such a way as to evoke so much imagery, not the least of which is the sense of smell, the most powerful of our senses. So sad.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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Even when you know its time for a parent to go on it is never easy. It also is a special time that brings healing when you have to clean out their house. thank you for touching my heart with your words.
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I checked and saw it listed as general poetry, but if this is biographical you have my sincere condolences.
Comment from nancyjam
Beautiful but sad double Nonet. the word choice
and the detailed descriptions lend to the emotional
impact of this piece.
Nicely done.
Nancy
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
Beautiful but sad double Nonet. the word choice
and the detailed descriptions lend to the emotional
impact of this piece.
Nicely done.
Nancy
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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thank you Nancy, That is such a hard time in life yet it has moments of comfort and peace.
Comment from heyjude
Judy, a good job on your first nonet and not just one but a double. Right on with the syllable.count for this nonet potlatch poetry challenge.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
Judy, a good job on your first nonet and not just one but a double. Right on with the syllable.count for this nonet potlatch poetry challenge.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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thank you , I enjoyed the challenge
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a great job with the prompt. Your lines flow smoothly & convey mixed emotions of sadness & a bit of cheerfulness.
You captured you feelings well with this format. Good job & thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
You did a great job with the prompt. Your lines flow smoothly & convey mixed emotions of sadness & a bit of cheerfulness.
You captured you feelings well with this format. Good job & thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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Thank you Janny, I remember that time with exactly what you said, mixed emotions. It was time for her to go. but no daughter is truly ready for that moment.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Your first Nonet and a double reverse Nonet at that.
Wow, you really pulled out all of the stops to tug on our heartstrings with this melancholy musing, jusylee.
Let me commend you for taking the plunge and participating in the potlatch challenge, and for composing and submitting an outstanding, heartwarming reverse Nonet as well.
Nicely done!
~Dean
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
Your first Nonet and a double reverse Nonet at that.
Wow, you really pulled out all of the stops to tug on our heartstrings with this melancholy musing, jusylee.
Let me commend you for taking the plunge and participating in the potlatch challenge, and for composing and submitting an outstanding, heartwarming reverse Nonet as well.
Nicely done!
~Dean
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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thank you Dean, I am continuing to grow. I thought such a structured piece would make it hard to get across my emotions, instead it multiplied them. Thank you as always, I am learning so much.
Comment from Liilia
This Nonnet is hauntingly beautiful. The small things like the unfinished crossword puzzle, the jar of mints and the chair wondering where she is are so poignant. Remind me of my mom, too. Very painful but somehow those days soon after the loved one's passing are lived through and eventually become treasures to make life richer and more accepting. Thank you for bringing me back memories of my mom with your poem.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
This Nonnet is hauntingly beautiful. The small things like the unfinished crossword puzzle, the jar of mints and the chair wondering where she is are so poignant. Remind me of my mom, too. Very painful but somehow those days soon after the loved one's passing are lived through and eventually become treasures to make life richer and more accepting. Thank you for bringing me back memories of my mom with your poem.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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Yes, it was time for my mom to go, but no daughter is ever truly ready for it. It does make me feel good that you remembered your mom through my poem. That is the reason I write. Thank You so much. Thank you also for the outstanding rating.
Comment from Joy Graham
This is very sad, Jusy. You bring out emotions and memories for me.
It reminds me when my grandmother-in-law passed away. It felt like she would greet us at the house. She had a great presence even after death. She was a quilter and we divided up her fabrics and sewing supplies. It felt so strange.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
This is very sad, Jusy. You bring out emotions and memories for me.
It reminds me when my grandmother-in-law passed away. It felt like she would greet us at the house. She had a great presence even after death. She was a quilter and we divided up her fabrics and sewing supplies. It felt so strange.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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thank you Joy, It is something we all have to go through and it takes a long time to clean out their houses, but it is healing.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
A beautiful nonnet about a topic none of us want to think about, but most of us will face--the death of our mothers.
I had the key to silence
No greeting awaited ~~ Wow, that hits the heartstrings!
Mom's smell
Lives
Two days
Since Mom died ~~ I remember that feeling after my father died. Hard one to get past.
Great job,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
A beautiful nonnet about a topic none of us want to think about, but most of us will face--the death of our mothers.
I had the key to silence
No greeting awaited ~~ Wow, that hits the heartstrings!
Mom's smell
Lives
Two days
Since Mom died ~~ I remember that feeling after my father died. Hard one to get past.
Great job,
Rhonda
Comment Written 31-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2016
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thank you Rhonda, funny I thought the structure might take away from the message, instead it really helped me to focus on what I wanted to say. Once again, Thanks all of you for teaching.me.