Desire Begs My Attention
Triolets28 total reviews
Comment from padumachitta
Hello. I am not sure desire is begging...I think it is demanding in an ever pleasant way:-)
Another hot poem. Phew, need a shower now...or a loooong run....:-)
padumachitta
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
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Hello. I am not sure desire is begging...I think it is demanding in an ever pleasant way:-)
Another hot poem. Phew, need a shower now...or a loooong run....:-)
padumachitta
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
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Thanks Padu for a wonderful review. I'd take the shower. LOL
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, pam, you did an excellent job writing this series of triolet poems about the desire that cannot be denied. i liked the second triolet the best..
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
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this is very well written, pam, you did an excellent job writing this series of triolet poems about the desire that cannot be denied. i liked the second triolet the best..
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2014
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Thanks Pam for an awesome review.
Comment from ProjectBluebook
This is indeed, romantic and I like the way you constructed this art. I like the entrance, how you repeat the three quatrains, unique, gives the poem promise, joy and personality. I have never done a romantic poem, frankly, so I am sailing uncharted waters, this looks tempting and delicious, I reckon. The book end words brand the mind, you can't forget these words but looks harmonious and romantic. Excellent, in my wee opinion but I am just one. But, in the end--there can only be one! words quoted by Duncan McCloud. wackydo
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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This is indeed, romantic and I like the way you constructed this art. I like the entrance, how you repeat the three quatrains, unique, gives the poem promise, joy and personality. I have never done a romantic poem, frankly, so I am sailing uncharted waters, this looks tempting and delicious, I reckon. The book end words brand the mind, you can't forget these words but looks harmonious and romantic. Excellent, in my wee opinion but I am just one. But, in the end--there can only be one! words quoted by Duncan McCloud. wackydo
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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You are crazy guy. Duncan McCloud? Hehehe. Seriously, thanks for a great review of this one.
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Dear Pam - I'm not really sure what triolets are, but still this work shares your need and love well. As always your style has moments of pause and then the sighs. I think there is always a way, those determined enough always find it and keep it.
Nicely done on this one.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Dear Pam - I'm not really sure what triolets are, but still this work shares your need and love well. As always your style has moments of pause and then the sighs. I think there is always a way, those determined enough always find it and keep it.
Nicely done on this one.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Thanks Maureen for a wonderful review.
Comment from Pili Pubul
Very interesting style , I am sure is yours , it said in many ways how " desire begs my attention,absorbs my waking dreams". And girl you
dream a lot... So here you go passionate, you can't get enough of him
in any way , shape or form . "Take me over again". Big sigh... Love. Pili
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Very interesting style , I am sure is yours , it said in many ways how " desire begs my attention,absorbs my waking dreams". And girl you
dream a lot... So here you go passionate, you can't get enough of him
in any way , shape or form . "Take me over again". Big sigh... Love. Pili
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Sigh thanks so much Pili for a beautiful review. Sigh girlie.
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LOL big sigh... Muahhhhh
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Smile Pili.
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Big smile , can't help it when I read your poem...
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Girl you are such a romantic. Sigh.
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You know , you are right, not a very good thing... Not very realistic I guess... Sigh
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My noni noni time...I woke up at four this morning... Crazyyyy , see you tomorow, nice dreams. Love pili
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Noni noni Pili. I know you were up early and must be tired. See you tomorrow. Love you.
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Good morning, still dark... Tomorrow my kids come. Exited. Love you... See u
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Mornin' glory!!! Oh I'm excited for you Pili. Love you.
Comment from krys123
Gungalo, I enjoyed your reading your poem very much because it is definitely enlightening and illuminative on the subject of romance and desire. Your writing is very masterful or has or manifests the knowledge, skill and experience needed for success in a particular field such as poetry. Particularly your rhymes are neither forced, labored or strained and are very brisk and their rhyme scheme very unusual but tremendously effective. Your rhythm flows smoothly throughout your poem which makes it easy for me to read your poem very clearly. Thank you so much for sharing and posting of your work for everyone and make the Lord be with you always.
Alex
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Gungalo, I enjoyed your reading your poem very much because it is definitely enlightening and illuminative on the subject of romance and desire. Your writing is very masterful or has or manifests the knowledge, skill and experience needed for success in a particular field such as poetry. Particularly your rhymes are neither forced, labored or strained and are very brisk and their rhyme scheme very unusual but tremendously effective. Your rhythm flows smoothly throughout your poem which makes it easy for me to read your poem very clearly. Thank you so much for sharing and posting of your work for everyone and make the Lord be with you always.
Alex
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Ahhh thanks so very much Alex for a wonderful review.
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Gungalo, You are so sincerely and entirely welcome.
Comment from Val Crisson
Well, this just an awesome poem, that is so well constructed I had to give it a six. The repetition of line "Desire begs my attention, absorbs my waking dreams" is truly amazing. Not only is that a unique way to address passion, you do it with alliteration and flow. Great poem
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Well, this just an awesome poem, that is so well constructed I had to give it a six. The repetition of line "Desire begs my attention, absorbs my waking dreams" is truly amazing. Not only is that a unique way to address passion, you do it with alliteration and flow. Great poem
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Thank you Val for a wonderful review. Sigh.
Comment from Lysa Schuler
This is a very good poem. "Desire begs my attention, absorbs my waking dreams." Repetition of those words bring emphasis to what follows after. It was easy to follow, kept my attention, and subject was clear. Excellent writ. God bless.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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This is a very good poem. "Desire begs my attention, absorbs my waking dreams." Repetition of those words bring emphasis to what follows after. It was easy to follow, kept my attention, and subject was clear. Excellent writ. God bless.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Thanks Lysa for a wonderful review of this one.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Desire begs my attention, absorbs my waking dreams (This line works perfectly in your poem!!!! I love the way you weave it in and out of the poem.)
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Desire begs my attention, absorbs my waking dreams (This line works perfectly in your poem!!!! I love the way you weave it in and out of the poem.)
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Thanks so much Barb for a wonderful review.
Comment from adewpearl
rhyming in excellent form in all three triolets except for one line in the third one where line six is an "a" rhyme instead of a "b" rhyme.
good use of the form's repeating lines and an effective choice to use the same A line to connect all three triolets.
a compelling expression of passionate desire
Brooke
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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rhyming in excellent form in all three triolets except for one line in the third one where line six is an "a" rhyme instead of a "b" rhyme.
good use of the form's repeating lines and an effective choice to use the same A line to connect all three triolets.
a compelling expression of passionate desire
Brooke
Comment Written 30-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2014
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Ah Brooke you were right. LOL I fixed it sort of. LOL Thanks you. Thanks for the great review too.
