The Old Violin
Anapestic Tetrameter contest entry82 total reviews
Comment from Pili Pubul
This is such a terrific poem , I love the great environment of delight,
I can hear the music and see the passionate dance.
Perfect style , great metaphors, word choice and art work... A gem. Pili
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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This is such a terrific poem , I love the great environment of delight,
I can hear the music and see the passionate dance.
Perfect style , great metaphors, word choice and art work... A gem. Pili
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Pili, for reviewing my poem and for the generous gift of six stars. Much appreciated, as are your lovely comments! Glad you enjoyed it!
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You are very welcome. Pili
Comment from mikemagine
Quite a passionate tribute to music, namely an old violin. My second oldest brother and my sister took violin (or was viola?)lessons from a Mr. Weimer. How successful were they? I guess I'll leave that with God, lol!
My mother was often the one who wore the pants in our home, and so I had to take choir freshman year. UGH! Hated it! Couldn't/can't sing worth a pot of(nevermind!).
Great poem. Keep writing!
Mike
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Quite a passionate tribute to music, namely an old violin. My second oldest brother and my sister took violin (or was viola?)lessons from a Mr. Weimer. How successful were they? I guess I'll leave that with God, lol!
My mother was often the one who wore the pants in our home, and so I had to take choir freshman year. UGH! Hated it! Couldn't/can't sing worth a pot of(nevermind!).
Great poem. Keep writing!
Mike
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Mike, for reviewing my poem. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it! My son is an accomplished violinist - but he certainly doesn't get it from me!
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Sure thing!!
Comment from Nosha17
Having written an anapaestic poem myself a while ago (15 syllables the line) I know how taxing it is. This was really enjoyable with music at its theme as I am a keen musician and singer (I play piano, but don't have one to practice on)The rhyming and rhythm were excellent. Good luck in the contest. Faye
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Having written an anapaestic poem myself a while ago (15 syllables the line) I know how taxing it is. This was really enjoyable with music at its theme as I am a keen musician and singer (I play piano, but don't have one to practice on)The rhyming and rhythm were excellent. Good luck in the contest. Faye
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Faye, for reviewing my poem. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Tony - You have not only followed the rules for this contest which I think are quite demanding but also written an excellent poem. Good abab rhyme scheme. Very clever play on words in your second line of stanza 1. bow/beau. Also good use of metaphor. Again good use of metaphor in your final line. Very well thought out in true poetic style. It brought to mind an old saying 'There's many a good tune played on an old violin'. Did you have this in mind I wonder? Perfect picture that suits the poem. One small point, the contest states 'Absolutely no author notes' - now I know your notes don't actually refer to the poem but I'd play safe and delete them. Good luck in the contest. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Hi Tony - You have not only followed the rules for this contest which I think are quite demanding but also written an excellent poem. Good abab rhyme scheme. Very clever play on words in your second line of stanza 1. bow/beau. Also good use of metaphor. Again good use of metaphor in your final line. Very well thought out in true poetic style. It brought to mind an old saying 'There's many a good tune played on an old violin'. Did you have this in mind I wonder? Perfect picture that suits the poem. One small point, the contest states 'Absolutely no author notes' - now I know your notes don't actually refer to the poem but I'd play safe and delete them. Good luck in the contest. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Dorothy, for reviewing my poem and for the generous gift of six stars. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it! Yes, I did have that saying in the back of my mind! I have taken your advice and removed the image credit. Thanks.
Comment from dennis0530
Nothing yet compares to the charm and liveliness which these vintage musical instruments generate. The modern acoustical sounds do not come close.
Reading once that violin is an instrument which can be made to laugh or cry, hearing it played by a virtuoso truly affirms the belief.
Add to this the auditory appeal of the clicking castanets and the chattering shakes of the lively tambourines, then create a melodious music with an old world appeal.
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Nothing yet compares to the charm and liveliness which these vintage musical instruments generate. The modern acoustical sounds do not come close.
Reading once that violin is an instrument which can be made to laugh or cry, hearing it played by a virtuoso truly affirms the belief.
Add to this the auditory appeal of the clicking castanets and the chattering shakes of the lively tambourines, then create a melodious music with an old world appeal.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Dennis, for reviewing my poem. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from Finglas
Well done. The content fits the structure perfectly. The cadence and imagery captures the the violin and dancers very well. Love the picture.
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Well done. The content fits the structure perfectly. The cadence and imagery captures the the violin and dancers very well. Love the picture.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Finglas, for reviewing my poem. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from Capricorn30
A well-crafted poem which I greatly enjoyed reading;
Great audio imagery:
"chattering shake of the shrill tambourine";
"castanets' clicking:
Music parallels romance, both in rhythm to heart's desire;
"wild strings of an old violin"--good metaphor appropriate of old woman's love capturing today's hearts.
Excellent!
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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A well-crafted poem which I greatly enjoyed reading;
Great audio imagery:
"chattering shake of the shrill tambourine";
"castanets' clicking:
Music parallels romance, both in rhythm to heart's desire;
"wild strings of an old violin"--good metaphor appropriate of old woman's love capturing today's hearts.
Excellent!
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Capricorn, for reviewing my poem and for the generous comments. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from livelylinda
Tony: oh, written so well I can almost hear the violin, canastas and tambourine in their lively, lusty tones building to fever pitch as the young gypsy woman danced and the men's hormones exploded in anticipation! The violin music a bit short of its original intent within an orchestra, perhaps . . . good writing and fun read. Original idea, new and fresh to begin the day. Linda
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Tony: oh, written so well I can almost hear the violin, canastas and tambourine in their lively, lusty tones building to fever pitch as the young gypsy woman danced and the men's hormones exploded in anticipation! The violin music a bit short of its original intent within an orchestra, perhaps . . . good writing and fun read. Original idea, new and fresh to begin the day. Linda
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Linda, for reviewing my poem and for the generous gift of six stars. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from adewpearl
lovely pairing of artwork and poem, which is in excellent anapestic tetrameter
a dramatic scene with strong emotional appeal
good alliteration and sensory appeal in castanets' clicking
a most evocative poem, my talented friend :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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lovely pairing of artwork and poem, which is in excellent anapestic tetrameter
a dramatic scene with strong emotional appeal
good alliteration and sensory appeal in castanets' clicking
a most evocative poem, my talented friend :-) Brooke
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, Brooke, for reviewing my poem. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from GangGreen
An atmospheric and captivating poem,well structured with a swaying rhythm and faultless rhyme scheme.Line Three is particularly note worthy.The Idea of the strings being deranged is innovative,a description that alludes to the derangement of the dance-I imagine the Tarran-tula being played here.The Sibilance of -Shake and Shrill is excellent,and -Castanets' clicking is very effective onomatopoeia.Good alliteration throughout.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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An atmospheric and captivating poem,well structured with a swaying rhythm and faultless rhyme scheme.Line Three is particularly note worthy.The Idea of the strings being deranged is innovative,a description that alludes to the derangement of the dance-I imagine the Tarran-tula being played here.The Sibilance of -Shake and Shrill is excellent,and -Castanets' clicking is very effective onomatopoeia.Good alliteration throughout.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2014
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Many thanks, GangGreen, for reviewing my poem and for the generous comments. Much appreciated! Glad you enjoyed it!
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No problem,tfawc us its a great poem.
