Comment from TKField

Excellent

I gotta say, that is one really cool painting. Va Va Voom! Yes, it is baffling why any straight male who was not in a coma would give this lass a pass. Still, I think you've captured a moment and a mood with this rather enigmatic piece. You don't happen to have her number do you? I promise not to leave abruptly.

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review. You seem like a gentleman who enjoys good art. I hope you meet her soon.

Comment from fastdigits

Excellent

Ah, what secrets lie behind the
seductive mask, the outer shell
of the damsel at the bar, what
heartbreak is encased in the
seductive smile and the look
of confidence.
Your words capture this moment
beautifully.
Well done

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review.

Comment from flylikeaneagle

Excellent

Mark: Congrats on the award. This is a mystery tanka, what he say and she say? Maybe, she was heart broken and wanted to be alone but with people. Should be a good contest! I like your photo too.
flylikeaneagle

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review.

Comment from sweetwoodjax

Excellent

this is an excellent write, mark, you did an excellent job trying to figure out the answer not of what made him leave when things are going so well. good luck in the contest

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review.

Comment from Smoothiecool

Excellent

your chosen words allow the reader to see and feel the wondering of why the sudden departure and still trying to look relaxed

good visual

good use "D" "L" "T" consonance

good use "O" assonance

flows well easy read

cheers Smoothiecool

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review.

Comment from GeorgieBoy

Exceptional

You make the reader wonder why he left, it is intriguing.
Could it be that she is too enticing? Did his wife or co workers walk in? You left us hanging. Well done!

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review.

Comment from thee-name

Excellent

Nice writing. Description is good.
SUDDENLY ALONE
SHE STILL TRIES TO LOOK RELAXED
CONFIDENT EVEN

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review.

reply by thee-name on 07-Nov-2014

THANK YOU!

Comment from livelylinda

Exceptional

Mark: a good Tanka poem. What she doesn't realize is that it is waaaaaay too soon to be looking for another because her emotions are emoting from everywhere on her body. Yes, she is attractive but her eyes are filled with intense sadness. It will be noticed and taken advantage of. Nice writing and a subject most men (assuming you are a man) wouldn't get right. livelylinda

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review. I am glad to know that unlike most of us men I got this one right.

Comment from Jackarrie

Excellent

This is a short poem, but has a profound intensity.
The reality is that Beauty is not enough to keep a man.

I love the painting I would love to know who painted it.

Well done
Mary

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review. I hope Fabian Perez gains new fans.

Comment from Wendyanne

Excellent

Hi Mark. You have us all wondering why he left so abruptly!! I like your presentation of this short but perplexing poem. Well done.

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Nov-2014

Thank you for your review.