Tender Tears
Minute Poem entry91 total reviews
Comment from Kenneth Schaal
I've read this several times; the perspective still eludes me. It's meant to be I guess. I'm thinking reflection here, and a view of self in retrospection. Best of luck should you need it. Kenny
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
I've read this several times; the perspective still eludes me. It's meant to be I guess. I'm thinking reflection here, and a view of self in retrospection. Best of luck should you need it. Kenny
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Kenny.
I guess I left this pretty open - the ending just came to me - as much a guessing game to me as to anybody else!
Steve
Comment from gypsycaravan
Oh, so tender is true. The only tears a child should ever need to shed should be for a skinned need or bruised elbow. Too many around the world are visualizing horrible atrocities and experiencing trauma and pain to themselves. Great poem, message and artwork.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
Oh, so tender is true. The only tears a child should ever need to shed should be for a skinned need or bruised elbow. Too many around the world are visualizing horrible atrocities and experiencing trauma and pain to themselves. Great poem, message and artwork.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Thanks, GC, for the thoughtful review.
Steve
Comment from ReaThomas
There's nothing more heartbreaking than a crying child. This poem is so melancholy with such a vivid picture to accompany it. Beautifully written.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
There's nothing more heartbreaking than a crying child. This poem is so melancholy with such a vivid picture to accompany it. Beautifully written.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Rea.
Steve
Comment from humpwhistle
I think, Steve, you're holding your cards very close to your vest on this one. Or maybe I'm reading too much into it. The last lines change the entire perspective.
In a way, you fast-forward the calendar pages. Or so I think. Maybe you're playing with 'minute'. Switching from one to another. Now I'm really stretching, aren't I?
I like my interpretation. Maybe you do, too.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
I think, Steve, you're holding your cards very close to your vest on this one. Or maybe I'm reading too much into it. The last lines change the entire perspective.
In a way, you fast-forward the calendar pages. Or so I think. Maybe you're playing with 'minute'. Switching from one to another. Now I'm really stretching, aren't I?
I like my interpretation. Maybe you do, too.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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You may be crediting me with too much subtlety!
Truth is I'd wrestled with the ending for an hour. Eventually gave up and went to bed and as soon as my head hit the pillow, this came to me - for once I as smart enough to get up and write it down rather than my usual 'I'll remember that in the morning'.
Your interpretation is as good as any other - some reviewers have jumped straight to child abuse...
No, I wasn't getting cutesy about 'minute' - not intentionally anyway - who knows what my subconscious was thinking?
Steve
Comment from c_lucas
Tears on a child's face is a sad thing, but when they are tears for another, it leads to spiritual Growth. This is very well written.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
Tears on a child's face is a sad thing, but when they are tears for another, it leads to spiritual Growth. This is very well written.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Charlie
Steve
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You're welcome, Steve. Charlie
Comment from mfowler
This is a very well structured and emotional read. The voice is probably that of father/mother and he/she is consoling the child for his sadness, saying that the tears must be for him/her. I liked that simple but effective image of the tear in vs 1, and I thought the turn in verse 3 when the parent's perspective is offered, is very poignant and gives the poem depth of emotion and narrative. Leaving the specific source of the tears and the actual identity of the voice unclear, gives the poem a stronger feel.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
This is a very well structured and emotional read. The voice is probably that of father/mother and he/she is consoling the child for his sadness, saying that the tears must be for him/her. I liked that simple but effective image of the tear in vs 1, and I thought the turn in verse 3 when the parent's perspective is offered, is very poignant and gives the poem depth of emotion and narrative. Leaving the specific source of the tears and the actual identity of the voice unclear, gives the poem a stronger feel.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Thanks for the thoughtful review.
The only thing I know for sure about this is that the ending came to me as I as drifting off to sleep and I had to jump up and write it down. As for what it means, your interpretation is as good as any other.
Steve
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
A very thoughtful minute poem and a topic I can really relate to also.
The image is quite haunting and the stanzas tell a sad tale.
Very nicely expressed and written.
:) Shirley
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
A very thoughtful minute poem and a topic I can really relate to also.
The image is quite haunting and the stanzas tell a sad tale.
Very nicely expressed and written.
:) Shirley
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Shirley, thanks for the kind words.
Steve
Comment from Domino 2
This isn't one of my fave poetry forms, Steve, as I find it difficult to incorporate smooth meter in a sort of abrupt form.
Anyway, you've done an excellent job here in dramatic well-rhymed couplets.
Best wishes, Ray
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
This isn't one of my fave poetry forms, Steve, as I find it difficult to incorporate smooth meter in a sort of abrupt form.
Anyway, you've done an excellent job here in dramatic well-rhymed couplets.
Best wishes, Ray
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Ray.
Yes, those three short lines in each stanza do make it difficult to get a smooth flow.
Steve
Comment from Gladness
I am still wondering why the child is crying. And is this the child's parent? Sorry, I am full of questions.
The poem rhymed well, and consistently.
Thanks, Anita
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
I am still wondering why the child is crying. And is this the child's parent? Sorry, I am full of questions.
The poem rhymed well, and consistently.
Thanks, Anita
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Anita.
Yes, the poem was designed to leave you full of questions - no use asking me for the answers either!
Steve
Comment from rjuselius
this is a beautiful minute contest entry! i once got terribly anxious becuase my mother didn't come home at a certain time and weaped for her loss until i was in her arms again.
thank you for sharing such a deep thought!
good luck in the contest!
rebekka x
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
this is a beautiful minute contest entry! i once got terribly anxious becuase my mother didn't come home at a certain time and weaped for her loss until i was in her arms again.
thank you for sharing such a deep thought!
good luck in the contest!
rebekka x
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2014
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Thanks, Rebekka. It is always a plus when a poem makes a personal connection with the reader.
Steve