In Ivy
a ghazal61 total reviews
Comment from Rasmine
Hello, SisCat,
Tricky poem. I had to look a few times to catch the rhyming scheme. This seems like a poem that could have taken you a little while to write. All hail to the ivy!
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
  |
Hello, SisCat,
Tricky poem. I had to look a few times to catch the rhyming scheme. This seems like a poem that could have taken you a little while to write. All hail to the ivy!
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, Rasmine, it took me about a week to write this poem. I reworked many couplets and cut others to reach this final form. Thank you for your review. All hail to ivy!
Comment from smileycloud
wow
looks complicated but I do believe you Nailed it!
the words are quite enchanting and the form appears to be fine
I never knew Ivy was quite so versatile
well done
have a smiley day
Lorraine
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
|
wow
looks complicated but I do believe you Nailed it!
the words are quite enchanting and the form appears to be fine
I never knew Ivy was quite so versatile
well done
have a smiley day
Lorraine
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, Lorraine, the versatility of the ghazal echoes the versatility of ivy. Everything is tangled in ivy. Thank you for your review.
Comment from dragonpoet
This poem shows that the simple things in life are worth cherishing and usually the most beautiful.
I like the green font color for the color of ivy and life
Keep writing
Happy Holidays
dp
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
|
This poem shows that the simple things in life are worth cherishing and usually the most beautiful.
I like the green font color for the color of ivy and life
Keep writing
Happy Holidays
dp
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, DP, the simple things in life are worth cherishing. When I read Michael McFee's "Cast-Iron Ghazal" I decided to write my ivy ghazal. Thank you for your review. Happy Holidays.
-
You're welcome, Sis Cat.
Joan
Comment from closetpoetjester
Whilst I'm not sure I like the continual same word as the end rhyme, I appreciate there are many forms and ways to pitch poetry and this is but one of them.
I liked the variations throughout using the same theme so to your credit, quite cleverly done within the bounds of the form.
Cheers P
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
|
Whilst I'm not sure I like the continual same word as the end rhyme, I appreciate there are many forms and ways to pitch poetry and this is but one of them.
I liked the variations throughout using the same theme so to your credit, quite cleverly done within the bounds of the form.
Cheers P
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, P, I love the challenge of the ghazal precisely because it uses the same words to end couplets, and yet there is so much freedom one could achieve in this form. Thank you for your encouraging review.
Comment from WalkerMan
Though I could never force my own words into such a form as a ghazal, I must say you did well with this one, including your enhancements mentioned in the notes. Your mom certainly had some interesting things to say about ivy.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
|
Though I could never force my own words into such a form as a ghazal, I must say you did well with this one, including your enhancements mentioned in the notes. Your mom certainly had some interesting things to say about ivy.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, WalkerMan, I have always wondered how my father's tools ended up in ivy after the divorce. My mother, if she were alive, would approve of the answers I imagined. Thank you for your review and encouragement.
-
You are welcome, Andre. I liked what you did with that difficult form. -- Mike
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Is that Barbara Crane's invention? It's so unusual that I can understand you wanting to try it out. Your 'Ivy Love' poem suited it well as it crept down the page in the couplets, (which I'm a fan of) just like Ivy does. The last two couplets made me smile, it brought back memories of my sons' picking daffodils from our garden to give me on Mother's Day. They were 4 and 7 years old. But the thought was there and I loved them for it. Well done, I enjoyed your love poem. Good luck! xx
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
|
Is that Barbara Crane's invention? It's so unusual that I can understand you wanting to try it out. Your 'Ivy Love' poem suited it well as it crept down the page in the couplets, (which I'm a fan of) just like Ivy does. The last two couplets made me smile, it brought back memories of my sons' picking daffodils from our garden to give me on Mother's Day. They were 4 and 7 years old. But the thought was there and I loved them for it. Well done, I enjoyed your love poem. Good luck! xx
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Thank you, Sandra, for your review and for wishing me good luck in the contest. The key component of the ghazal is the author including his or her name in the final couplet, as in this example , "And I, Shahid, only am escaped to tell thee." It's like a person signing his or her name to the end of a letter. But in Western tradition, the inclusion of an author's name within the end of the poem may seem obtrusive, so Western poets seek creative ways to include their names at the end of ghazals. I like Crane's solution of composing her ghazal as her mother's talk to her while brushing her hair. It felt natural when the mother mentioned the author's name at the end as part of the conversation. I plan to keep playing with this form. Thanks.
Comment from kiwigirl2821
It is a beautiful piece of writing. Creative and heartfelt! I always love learning a new form of writing and you have given both wonderful explanation and a gorgeous example. Well done and good luck. xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
|
It is a beautiful piece of writing. Creative and heartfelt! I always love learning a new form of writing and you have given both wonderful explanation and a gorgeous example. Well done and good luck. xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, Kiwi, I love learning new forms of poetry. If you can, look up Michael McFee's "Cast-Iron Ghazal." It is amazing. Thank you for your review of my heartfelt poem and for wishing me good luck in the contest.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Ivy with it's twisting and winding vines and rich green leaves is a perfect plant for love to be entwined and lost in. I loved your words and this is an unusual experiment that paid of here, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
|
Ivy with it's twisting and winding vines and rich green leaves is a perfect plant for love to be entwined and lost in. I loved your words and this is an unusual experiment that paid of here, love Dolly x
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, Dolly, I was amazed but not surprised to learn that for thousands of years ivy has been associated with love, fidelity, friendship, and immortality. When I saw video of a tranquilized mountain lion tumbling down a San Francisco hillside covered with ivy, I began to smell the crushed leaves and recall playing in ivy. I could not shake the sensations and memories, so I wrote about them. Thank you for your review.
Comment from jenintorre
I have enjoyed reading your love poem. Amazing how much can be said about such a simple thing as ivy. I found this very original. I wish you good luck in the competition.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
|
I have enjoyed reading your love poem. Amazing how much can be said about such a simple thing as ivy. I found this very original. I wish you good luck in the competition.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, jenintorre, it's amazing how much can be said about a simple, overlooked plant--ivy. Thank you for your review and for wishing me good luck in the contest.
Comment from BOO ghost
Romance~ that takes a lot of imagination to write a love poem twisted in ivy. You pulled it off. Yep,looks a bit complicated after reading the author notes. Now I see a pattern,is not just some jumbled words here. Like the green words which blends into the green canopy. This love poem is very different. To BOO, this looks like a winner. Is not a generic write on love. Love s in the eye of the beholder. good idea on this ghazal. The first I ever seen. Not seen you in may moons, Sis Cat. BOO is impressed. BOO~
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
 |
Romance~ that takes a lot of imagination to write a love poem twisted in ivy. You pulled it off. Yep,looks a bit complicated after reading the author notes. Now I see a pattern,is not just some jumbled words here. Like the green words which blends into the green canopy. This love poem is very different. To BOO, this looks like a winner. Is not a generic write on love. Love s in the eye of the beholder. good idea on this ghazal. The first I ever seen. Not seen you in may moons, Sis Cat. BOO is impressed. BOO~
Comment Written 03-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2017
-
Yes, Boo, although Arabians and Indians have written ghazals for thousands of years, only in the last twenty have Western poets experimented with this form, which is so unusual and rare that I can see why Barbara Crane's "Love Refrains" ghazal is a finalist in the Rattle Poetry Award. Thank you for your generous, six star review and for declaring my poem a winner in FS' contest.
-
Whether you win or fanstory or not, I know that this is A WINNER! You pulled off a masterpiece.Amazing talent shown here.
