Mike And The Tree
An inchworm decides to leave his home to explore the World85 total reviews
Comment from expressions9
This is an excellent poem Eric - something that would certainly keep the attention of kids and is also interesting for us adults. That was quite a journey the inchworm took. No place like home! Great imagery throughout.
Thanks for sharing :)
Christine
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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This is an excellent poem Eric - something that would certainly keep the attention of kids and is also interesting for us adults. That was quite a journey the inchworm took. No place like home! Great imagery throughout.
Thanks for sharing :)
Christine
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Thank you ... Christine
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You're welcome
Comment from Jendowoz
This is a lovely poem, Eric. What a great adventure that little inchworm had. But as he says it's nice to come home too and the faithful and loving friends and family are usually always there to greet you.
regards, Jen
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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This is a lovely poem, Eric. What a great adventure that little inchworm had. But as he says it's nice to come home too and the faithful and loving friends and family are usually always there to greet you.
regards, Jen
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Thanks much Jen
Comment from Curly Girly
I liked the rhyme and rhythm. I get the feeling that I have read something to similar to this already.
You wrote:
The bike, it had broken in two.
He was now without his money
And had holes in all of his shoes.
*Suggest changing this line:
And had holes in all of his shoes.
It needs to end with 'shoe' so that it will rhyme properly.
CG
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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I liked the rhyme and rhythm. I get the feeling that I have read something to similar to this already.
You wrote:
The bike, it had broken in two.
He was now without his money
And had holes in all of his shoes.
*Suggest changing this line:
And had holes in all of his shoes.
It needs to end with 'shoe' so that it will rhyme properly.
CG
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Well all of my stories are somewhat similar. A little Viking...A young boy...an inchworm...they all go on a little journey...the moral is always different.
Thanks for the edit
Comment from Joannforsberg
Clap, clap, clap. Truly a excellent fun story. If you don't turn this into a children's book many will be disappointed. Excellent story that I can so see my grandchildren asking me to read again and again to them. Please make a book out of this and then let me know. I shall be the first to buy it off a shelf. Blessings, JO
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Clap, clap, clap. Truly a excellent fun story. If you don't turn this into a children's book many will be disappointed. Excellent story that I can so see my grandchildren asking me to read again and again to them. Please make a book out of this and then let me know. I shall be the first to buy it off a shelf. Blessings, JO
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Now all I need is 100000 more to say the same and I would self-publish. I'm getting one new fan a week but they're not as enthusiastic as you. I feel this is my 4th or 5th best story. I hope you read them all Jo. xoxo
and you liked my prostitute story ...lol
Comment from Kevin C
This is a wonderful poem that reads so well. I love the flow and rhyme. The story is great and could be for young and old. I thought the message was so clever. Thank you for a fun read.
Kevin
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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This is a wonderful poem that reads so well. I love the flow and rhyme. The story is great and could be for young and old. I thought the message was so clever. Thank you for a fun read.
Kevin
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Thanks much Kevin
Comment from Janet Foor
"The Brown And Ugly Tree" is a delightful poem with very nice rhyme and a smooth cadence, It gives us a powerful lesson through the little inchworm. There really is no place like home.
Best wishes,
Janet
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"The Brown And Ugly Tree" is a delightful poem with very nice rhyme and a smooth cadence, It gives us a powerful lesson through the little inchworm. There really is no place like home.
Best wishes,
Janet
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
Comment from doris1022
Very cute well written and the art is fine. I can see this as a lesson for the wandering spirit. there is no place like home. to the runaway child. Have a good day and keep your pen dipped in the cosmic dust of creative stars.
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Very cute well written and the art is fine. I can see this as a lesson for the wandering spirit. there is no place like home. to the runaway child. Have a good day and keep your pen dipped in the cosmic dust of creative stars.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello to you EricDaGoose
smiles I had fun reading your poem with the rhyming and enjoyable rhythm
Sounds like you are saying, 'there is nothing like home or the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence.'
Gert
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Hello to you EricDaGoose
smiles I had fun reading your poem with the rhyming and enjoyable rhythm
Sounds like you are saying, 'there is nothing like home or the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence.'
Gert
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Thanks for the sixer Gert...I needed that
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You are welcome
smiles
Gert
Comment from Selina Stambi
Hello friend - delighted to see that you've begun to use punctuation and that you are getting better at it!
I would give you a six for this if not for the the metre thing-y that gets a wee bit wobbly at times.
A great poem, written in your inimitable style whereby nonsense makes perfect sense!
Go Goose, go!!
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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Hello friend - delighted to see that you've begun to use punctuation and that you are getting better at it!
I would give you a six for this if not for the the metre thing-y that gets a wee bit wobbly at times.
A great poem, written in your inimitable style whereby nonsense makes perfect sense!
Go Goose, go!!
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2013
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I only use punctuation in my stories; otherwise, in my little poppers, I go without.
Comment from October21
You know, this is fun poetry with excellent rhyming and flow. But there is a message that caught my eye while I was reading. We can leave our childhood place but there really is no place like home:-)
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You know, this is fun poetry with excellent rhyming and flow. But there is a message that caught my eye while I was reading. We can leave our childhood place but there really is no place like home:-)
Comment Written 09-Jan-2013
