Reviews from

Haiku ( a fierce thunderstorm)

contest entry

53 total reviews 
Comment from BigPoppaJrock
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A very well written and descriptive Haiku you have penned. Your visual aid helps create the illusion of a fierce thunderstorm. Good luck in the contest thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
    Thanks so much for your review very kind comments and best wishes, they are greatly appreciated.

    Blessings...Portia
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Those thunder storms hurt at times and we have had them often in England, it is almost like the heavens are angry, few words here letting go of a mighty storm, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
    Dolly,

    Thanks so much sweetie, for you review and comments, they are greatly appreciated.

    Hugs...Portia
Comment from Natalie Goodwin
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I can imagine the hailstones coming down. This is a great haiku. I like that the last line is only one word. Best of luck in the contest. Natalie.

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
    Natalie,

    Thanks so much for such an outstanding review, six star rating and best wishes, they are greatly appreciated. Have a wonderful day.

    Blessings...Portia
Comment from Bicpen
Excellent
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It sounds good and speaks with its own voice I aint no expert but is this conforming to the format ... who really knows it grips the winter with a terror of emotion and enlightens the mind.

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
    Bicpen,
    Thanks so much for your review and kind comments, they are greatly appreciated.

    Blessings...Portia
reply by Bicpen on 15-Feb-2020
    anytime ... Like I say I aint no expert but I like to learn about the other formats ...
Comment from jenintorre
Excellent
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This is a very cleverly written Haiku poem with a double meaning. I think you have a winner here. I wish you lots of luck in the competition. Best wishes. Jen.

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
    Jen,
    Thanks so much for your review very kind comments and best wishes, they are greatly appreciated.

    Blessings...Portia
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A very well-written haiku about the fierce thunderstorm that produces hail stones that can break everything in their way down to the ground. Always a devastating experience to have around you.

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
    Sandra,

    Thanks so much for your review and very kind comments, they are greatly appreciated.

    Blessings...Portia
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Ooooo... I like you choice of topic here and great way to choose words to make that storm seem real! ;) I would, perhaps, make a couple of suggestions (and PLEASE feel free to ignore!!):

instead of the dash (-) at the end of your second line, use a tilde (~) as it blends the 2nd to 3rd lines rather than putting harsh break in there

although a haiku does not have to be 17 syllables (that's just a maximum), your first lines are so bold and strong that your last line - instead of leaving the reader with that same bold 'parting image' - seems almost 'cut-off' or 'lacking'.... because 'groundbreaking' is a really great word with not only strong but visual connotations, I think you should add to the visual to 'finish' strong with, perhaps, 'groundbreaking downpour'

Again, you are free to ignore one or both... yours is an awesome idea! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck! ;) Yvette

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
    Yvette,
    Oh, how sweet and kind you are. Thanks so much for your review and suggestions, which I greatly appreciate. I have placed your suggestions in the haiku and wow! an amazing compliment to this
    Haiku. Thanks and sending a a "BIG HUG" your way. lots of love Portia
reply by Y. M. Roger on 15-Feb-2020
    Just so very glad you did not take my suggestion in a negative way....whew! ;) ;) ;) Have a wonderful weekend out there!! ;)
Comment from Dancemom
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a well-written poem for the haiku poetry contest. You have described this hailstorm very well and I love how you described it as pulverizing.

Great job! Thank you for sharing and have a wonderful day.

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2020
    Thanks so much for your review and very kind comments, they are greatly appreciated.

    Blessings...Portia
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You did a great job with your haiku contest entry, pharp. Your words paint a super picture for readers. Good job, too, with the syllable count. Thanks for sharing and best wishes. Respectfully, Jan

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2020

    Thanks so much for your review, very kind comments, and best wishes they are greatly appreciated.

    Blessings...Portia
Comment from Darlene Franklin
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I love this one. I love the fierce words you use to describe the hail, and the last line is perfect. The hail is indeed breaking the ground and everything else it touches.

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2020
    Darlene,
    Thanks so much for such an outstanding review, the six star rating and your very kind comments, they are greatly appreciated.

    Blessings...Portia
reply by Darlene Franklin on 16-Feb-2020
    You are most welcome!