Family Poems and Stories 2010-2017
Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "The Bar Stool"...musings on us
57 total reviews
Comment from patcelaw
There are far more children today fearing their drunken father will come for them and be in a rage. Such a rage that he could take a gun and shoot them all. My father did not have trouble with alcohol, but had a violent temper and we kids often suffer the brunt of his anger. Patricia
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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There are far more children today fearing their drunken father will come for them and be in a rage. Such a rage that he could take a gun and shoot them all. My father did not have trouble with alcohol, but had a violent temper and we kids often suffer the brunt of his anger. Patricia
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
Thank you so much for stopping by to read and review. I always appreciate your time and continuous support of my work. I am pleased you enjoyed this piece.
Hope you have a great day,
~patty~😀
Comment from pome lover
good grief, Patty, how awful. I'm so sorry you have those memories.
But it looks like you are very happy now. Good for you.
That is a worrisome story, though well told. You put the reader right there in the bar with him - also ready to stop him. :)
nicely done.
pome lover
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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good grief, Patty, how awful. I'm so sorry you have those memories.
But it looks like you are very happy now. Good for you.
That is a worrisome story, though well told. You put the reader right there in the bar with him - also ready to stop him. :)
nicely done.
pome lover
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
Thank you so much for stopping by to read and review. I always appreciate your time and continuous support of my work. I am pleased you enjoyed this piece.
Hope you have a great day,
~patty~😀
Comment from DLBoo
Very well written, Patty. Sorry about your father. Sounds a lot like my ex-husband. It never ceases to amaze me when people both male and female find the company of Al C. Hall and his pals more enjoyable than their own children. Especially when Mr.Hall and his pals are enjoyed to the point that families are destroyed. Thank you for sharing this once fear in your life with us.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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Very well written, Patty. Sorry about your father. Sounds a lot like my ex-husband. It never ceases to amaze me when people both male and female find the company of Al C. Hall and his pals more enjoyable than their own children. Especially when Mr.Hall and his pals are enjoyed to the point that families are destroyed. Thank you for sharing this once fear in your life with us.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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thank you for stopping by to read and review. I so appreciate your kind words,
~patty~
Comment from TAB_that's me
The drinking - my ex-husband drank too much for too many years.
The ending was chilling. I thought he was going to die in an accident.
Well written story - no spag.
Teresa
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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The drinking - my ex-husband drank too much for too many years.
The ending was chilling. I thought he was going to die in an accident.
Well written story - no spag.
Teresa
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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thank you for stopping by to read and review. I so appreciate your kind words,
~patty~
Comment from nuthead
Powerful story. Too many people, men and women, choose their addiction over their children. Makes me sad, and angry.
You did a great job developing this, the bar scene, the progression of his thoughts. I felt the suspense when he made the decision to go see them but knew it wouldn't go well. The gun in the pocket steered us in a very darker direction.
Thumbing through the items stashed in the crease <-- great imagery.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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Powerful story. Too many people, men and women, choose their addiction over their children. Makes me sad, and angry.
You did a great job developing this, the bar scene, the progression of his thoughts. I felt the suspense when he made the decision to go see them but knew it wouldn't go well. The gun in the pocket steered us in a very darker direction.
Thumbing through the items stashed in the crease <-- great imagery.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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thank you for stopping by to read and review. I so appreciate your kind words,
~patty~
Comment from lyenochka
*gasp!* What terror you must have had those nights! You described the situation well from the bar and the blurry thoughts about regrets through the beer. So sad.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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*gasp!* What terror you must have had those nights! You described the situation well from the bar and the blurry thoughts about regrets through the beer. So sad.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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thank you for stopping by to read and review. I so appreciate your kind words,
~patty~
Comment from rtobaygo
Good afternoon, Patty
Excellent flow and continuity. I found myself sitting at the opposite end of the bar studying your character. I found his thoughts interesting especially where he convinced himself that his children would be happy to see him. Enjoyed!
The dimly lit bar smelled of stale beer and desperation. Great line!
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
PS: Unfortunately my late father-in-law was a functioning alcoholic.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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Good afternoon, Patty
Excellent flow and continuity. I found myself sitting at the opposite end of the bar studying your character. I found his thoughts interesting especially where he convinced himself that his children would be happy to see him. Enjoyed!
The dimly lit bar smelled of stale beer and desperation. Great line!
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
PS: Unfortunately my late father-in-law was a functioning alcoholic.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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thank you for stopping by to read and review. I so appreciate your kind words,
~patty~
Comment from Thomas Bowling
"The dimly lit bar smelled of stale beer and desperation."
Your imagery is fantastic.
I think the only laughter he's going to hear will be his kids laughing at the drunk.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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"The dimly lit bar smelled of stale beer and desperation."
Your imagery is fantastic.
I think the only laughter he's going to hear will be his kids laughing at the drunk.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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thank you so much for stopping by to read and review. This story was one that was hard to write. I wonder if he even missed us at all,
~patty~
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
How awful! You poor thing, no child should have to feel that way about a parent, they are supposed to be there for you, to love and care for you, not to scare the hell out of you. I was one of the lucky ones and feel so sad for children who weren't. Your story is obviously what you used to think he would be like if he came back. So sorry. Big hugs. Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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How awful! You poor thing, no child should have to feel that way about a parent, they are supposed to be there for you, to love and care for you, not to scare the hell out of you. I was one of the lucky ones and feel so sad for children who weren't. Your story is obviously what you used to think he would be like if he came back. So sorry. Big hugs. Sandra xxx
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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thank you so much for stopping by to read and review. This story was one that was hard to write. I wonder if he even missed us at all,
~patty~
Comment from Nikki-Nicole
This is a good read.
And like the song says, 'It' five o'clock somewhere. Sadly, some people think it's five o'clock all the time.- Early in the morning, all throughout the day and late at night.
Great artwork: The image looks good for this material.
The author's notes are greatly appreciated.-Thank you!
I dated an alcoholic for 8 months, and while we were together, I wrote "You Might Be An Alcoholic". I didn't know he had a drinking problem when we first started dating. His alcohol abuse cost me a car (barely even used) and almost cost me a second vehicle. Wed have a daughter together, but I separated from him when I was 3 months pregnant, and he hasn't laid eyes on her. She's almost two years old now. People don't realize what they've lost until it's gone.
Thanks for sharing your story.
Good luck with your future writing!
-Nicole-
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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This is a good read.
And like the song says, 'It' five o'clock somewhere. Sadly, some people think it's five o'clock all the time.- Early in the morning, all throughout the day and late at night.
Great artwork: The image looks good for this material.
The author's notes are greatly appreciated.-Thank you!
I dated an alcoholic for 8 months, and while we were together, I wrote "You Might Be An Alcoholic". I didn't know he had a drinking problem when we first started dating. His alcohol abuse cost me a car (barely even used) and almost cost me a second vehicle. Wed have a daughter together, but I separated from him when I was 3 months pregnant, and he hasn't laid eyes on her. She's almost two years old now. People don't realize what they've lost until it's gone.
Thanks for sharing your story.
Good luck with your future writing!
-Nicole-
Comment Written 12-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2017
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thank you so much for stopping by to read and review. This story was one that was hard to write. I wonder if he even missed us at all. I'm so glad your daughter won't have any of those memories,
~patty~
