From our soul.
Viewing comments for Chapter 53 "Reflections."Mostly romance.
96 total reviews
Comment from mikemagine
Alone and afraid? That is what I'm getting from this. Memories are the only thing that console the poem's speaker, and those memories are so long ago and far away...
Mike
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Alone and afraid? That is what I'm getting from this. Memories are the only thing that console the poem's speaker, and those memories are so long ago and far away...
Mike
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Never alone Mike, But difficult times, thank you so very much, smiles. Pili
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:-)
Comment from Goodauthor
Although I understood what you message, this particular form of Free Verse is not good for this particular poem and punctuation is necessary to the flow. It would actually have more impact on the reader if the lines were longer and more explicit.
Shadows
floating
on my mind
warm glow
on my breast
reflections
of a thousand
memories
Ex:
{Shadows silently floating on my mind,
reflections of a thousand memories,
leave a warm glow on my breast.}
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
 |
Although I understood what you message, this particular form of Free Verse is not good for this particular poem and punctuation is necessary to the flow. It would actually have more impact on the reader if the lines were longer and more explicit.
Shadows
floating
on my mind
warm glow
on my breast
reflections
of a thousand
memories
Ex:
{Shadows silently floating on my mind,
reflections of a thousand memories,
leave a warm glow on my breast.}
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Thank you so very much for your suggestions and review. Pili
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You're welcome.
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Pili this is lovely free verse full of simile and metaphor throughout. Stanza 1 is a lovely example of simile. Your penultimate stanza makes good use of metaphor and is lovely. A lovely expressive read. Warm regards Dorothy
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Pili this is lovely free verse full of simile and metaphor throughout. Stanza 1 is a lovely example of simile. Your penultimate stanza makes good use of metaphor and is lovely. A lovely expressive read. Warm regards Dorothy
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Thank you so very much Dorothy... Pili
Comment from thee-name
Good writing. Has the fantasy feel.
ANCIENT SONGS
CAN BE HEARD
FROM FAR AWAY
LOST WORDS
CLING TO BLUE STARS
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Good writing. Has the fantasy feel.
ANCIENT SONGS
CAN BE HEARD
FROM FAR AWAY
LOST WORDS
CLING TO BLUE STARS
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Thank you so very much. Pili
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THANK YOU!
Comment from dragonpoet
This free verse poem tells of deep introspection of a person who has lost a lot and is remembering that. I like the single words. They allow the feeling of floating away on the memory but trying hard to cling to the dream of the things lost.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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This free verse poem tells of deep introspection of a person who has lost a lot and is remembering that. I like the single words. They allow the feeling of floating away on the memory but trying hard to cling to the dream of the things lost.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Thank you so very much for a very meaningful comment. Pili
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No problem, Pili
Joan
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;:-)
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is a beautiful write, pili pubal, you did an excellent job writing this free verse poem with words of great emotion drifting softly down the page. I enjoyed reading it
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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this is a beautiful write, pili pubal, you did an excellent job writing this free verse poem with words of great emotion drifting softly down the page. I enjoyed reading it
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Thank you so very much , meaningful review. Pili
Comment from robina1978
Excellent artwork that complements your free verse very well. A true free verse with many elements. Your soul feels like an island. Shadows and ancient songs.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Excellent artwork that complements your free verse very well. A true free verse with many elements. Your soul feels like an island. Shadows and ancient songs.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Thank you so much Robina, great review. Have a peaceful night. Pili
Comment from Eric1
Hi Pili, so, this is where you've been hiding! What a beautiful free verse poem my friend, you have made great use of wonderful imagery and description,
Shadows
silently
floating
on my mind
That is inspirational,thank you for sharing!
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
|
Hi Pili, so, this is where you've been hiding! What a beautiful free verse poem my friend, you have made great use of wonderful imagery and description,
Shadows
silently
floating
on my mind
That is inspirational,thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Thank you so very much Eric, big smile. Pili
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You are most welcome Pili.
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You are most welcome Pili.
Comment from tbacha58
A voice
quivers
forlorn
by yesterday's
soft whispered night
My God Pili, your poem made me think how much sadness we human beings carry during our lifetime. The suffering has no end. You are such an elegant writer, so deep are your poems, you write a lifetime story in each and every poem. I hope you could publish your work, the world would be lucky to read your deep warm poems. I just love them, they are so real. Sorry my six is gone. Bless you my friend. Much love from Montreal. Terry xooxxo
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
|
A voice
quivers
forlorn
by yesterday's
soft whispered night
My God Pili, your poem made me think how much sadness we human beings carry during our lifetime. The suffering has no end. You are such an elegant writer, so deep are your poems, you write a lifetime story in each and every poem. I hope you could publish your work, the world would be lucky to read your deep warm poems. I just love them, they are so real. Sorry my six is gone. Bless you my friend. Much love from Montreal. Terry xooxxo
Comment Written 28-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014
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Wow, thank you my friend. You humble me. What a meaningful and encouraging review !!!! Big hugs. Pili
Comment from JPilcher
So beautiful!! Love, love, love the image!! The background color and font choice compliment this piece perfectly - overall presentation is absolutely beautiful. I have never written such a completely/real (per se) free verse such as this - and especially without punctuation!! I just can't pull it off. You, however, you definitely did!!! :) Jill P.
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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So beautiful!! Love, love, love the image!! The background color and font choice compliment this piece perfectly - overall presentation is absolutely beautiful. I have never written such a completely/real (per se) free verse such as this - and especially without punctuation!! I just can't pull it off. You, however, you definitely did!!! :) Jill P.
Comment Written 27-Nov-2014
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014
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Wow, thank you so much for your very encouraging comment. Pili
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My pleasure.. Really!! :)
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Smiles..
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:)
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Cute
