Reviews from

Writings From the Heart

Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Your turn with the Soap"
A book of Poetry & Writing

128 total reviews 
Comment from Black Butterfly
Excellent
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I remember feeling like this in my teenage years. Trying to please my parents, friends, and even guys. But in the past three years I have been being true to me and I find myself being much happier. We can't please all people so why try? When you the one who really matters is hurting. It's never worth it. Very good. :)

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    thank you Black Butterfly for your review
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Excellent
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Hi deepwater,

Little lies always lead to larger ones and eventually all unravels, usually with enormous hurt to everyone, yet we don't seem to learn much do we.

Well written, good work.

Patrick

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    thank you Patrick
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
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This is a very thought-
provoking piece.
I remember hearing the saying
"wash your mouth out with soap"
when direct lies were told. The
trouble with lies are, they have
no legs and others have to be
told to support them.

We are told ,we are all Gods' children
We are told, we are all God's children

Well penned, Gary.

Margaret.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    will make the change and thank you for the review Margaret, its a hard week keep getting one star one my work from the same people but i guess i can not please all Gary
reply by Margaret Snowdon on 17-Jun-2010
    one star!! Do they know anything about poetic work - makes you wonder. M
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    well i guess each to his or her tast
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a very thought-
provoking piece.
I remember hearing the saying
"wash your mouth out with soap"
when direct lies were told. The
trouble with lies are, they have
no legs and others have to be
told to support them.

We are told ,we are all Gods' children
We are told, we are all God's children

Well penned, Gary.

Margaret.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    thanks again Margaret
Comment from luisestable
Average
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I do not know if the metaphor soap woks as well as you wanted it to work. It is a good poem , but I don`t see it very poetic given the argument it tries to master.

Perhaps the diction is a bit on the side of prose or just too light to call it poetry, but a good try, though.

Keep improving.

Luis

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    Poetry is a funny thing Luis, you and please some but never all then there is just the one or two like yourself , have a great day
Comment from jmdg1954
Excellent
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Well written poem once again. The subject matter is one everyone has to deal with in there life in one way shape or form. You have depicted it clearly and with telling one to be true to themself and know who you are.
Nicely done,
John

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    thank you John for your review and comments Gary
Comment from Auroraboreal800
Excellent
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I would like to begging this review by saying ¡Thank you! For this great poem full of love and substance...
"Be yourself" is the biggest luxury in life. When we are ¡we! We never have to lie.
BEAUTIFUL POETRY!!

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    Thank you Auroraboreal for your review and great comment Gary
Comment from M. Karol
Excellent
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"Soap was the punishment for children, to wash away their lies,

What is it for adults, to wash away tears and pain we hide?"

I think our values and perspective change as we grow old. Our hearts are not as pure .
I wish it was as easy to wash all those lies with some soap.

Well put, good flow.
Madhvi

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    thank you Madhiv for the review
Comment from Lynar
Excellent
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I enjoyed the composition of natural solo voice. The flow was conversational,intricate rhyme pattern. It helped me take a harder look at family values. Heartfelt emotion from your heart could be easily related to. Your questions did make me think. (lead, hide, whims, true, do etc.) that drew the reader into your poetry, with the complimentary artwork. I would recommend to my friends, Chapter 11: Your turn with the Soap. Excellent. No negative comments.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    thank you Lynar for your review and comments
reply by Lynar on 17-Jun-2010
    You're very welcome, deepwater
Comment from D- of a CrackedMind
Excellent
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How true,a well written piece, a beautiful gentle thought provoking piece of art with a powerful messages, very creative and captivating with a wonderful easy flow. great Imagery Well Done, thankyou, take care,D.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2010
    thank you D for your review and comments