Exposed
free verse58 total reviews
Comment from Dean Kuch
Now why would me or anyone else want to pick it apart, rip it or shred your work any any way, Teresa? Those who consider themselves poets wear their hearts as well as their emotions on their sleeves. So what kind of cruel, callous person would care to do something like that when all you're really doing is sharing your innermost thoughts with us all?
Not I. I say good for you, let it rip, get all of your feelings out into the open for the whole damn world to see, if you must...
...than let the chips fall where they may.
~Dean
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Now why would me or anyone else want to pick it apart, rip it or shred your work any any way, Teresa? Those who consider themselves poets wear their hearts as well as their emotions on their sleeves. So what kind of cruel, callous person would care to do something like that when all you're really doing is sharing your innermost thoughts with us all?
Not I. I say good for you, let it rip, get all of your feelings out into the open for the whole damn world to see, if you must...
...than let the chips fall where they may.
~Dean
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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thanks /dean:)
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Hey, my pleasure, "t". ;)
Comment from The Mom/DarleneThomson
I don't have any six stars left this late in the week. Otherwise, I would have given you one. No artwork is needed for your poem. It does stand alone. There will be no ripping it or shredding it apart. It is a piece of fine art. An excellent poem that flows very well. The reader can construe your message clearly. Best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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I don't have any six stars left this late in the week. Otherwise, I would have given you one. No artwork is needed for your poem. It does stand alone. There will be no ripping it or shredding it apart. It is a piece of fine art. An excellent poem that flows very well. The reader can construe your message clearly. Best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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thanks /darlene:)
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Your welcome
Comment from tfawcus
The metaphor of the baby encompasses a great deal here, not least the vulnerability of the poet. We do indeed go naked, exposing more of that which is within us than most people do, and it is only right that the anticipated response should be nurturing rather than abusive. I like the idea of the fragmented parts being recycled to create another poem, perhaps even a better one. I enjoyed reading this.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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The metaphor of the baby encompasses a great deal here, not least the vulnerability of the poet. We do indeed go naked, exposing more of that which is within us than most people do, and it is only right that the anticipated response should be nurturing rather than abusive. I like the idea of the fragmented parts being recycled to create another poem, perhaps even a better one. I enjoyed reading this.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thank you so much Tony:)
Comment from cmowen87
Loved your flow throughout. The free verse was well written and allowed the reader to move easily from line to line. I like that you did not add artwork. This allowed the reader to take what they want from the poem. Great job
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Loved your flow throughout. The free verse was well written and allowed the reader to move easily from line to line. I like that you did not add artwork. This allowed the reader to take what they want from the poem. Great job
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thanks:)
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Oh, I love it. At first it seems as though you are talking about a human relationship and how it has devastated you as you were hurt, and then at the end comes the glorious revelation that it is your writing that tears you apart. Oh, haven't we all been there? Great job,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Oh, I love it. At first it seems as though you are talking about a human relationship and how it has devastated you as you were hurt, and then at the end comes the glorious revelation that it is your writing that tears you apart. Oh, haven't we all been there? Great job,
Rhonda
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thank you Rhonda. I am so glad you 'got' it:)
Comment from royowen
Wow! Teresa, it's starts off neutrally enough, it's what we all want, then morphs into.something verbally violent, and then progresses to wanting the whole thing into a poem of substance, but I guess that's what we all want! Brilliant free verse my friend! Great wording and expressive and image breaking, descriptive language. Well done, good entry, good luck, blessings. Roy.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Wow! Teresa, it's starts off neutrally enough, it's what we all want, then morphs into.something verbally violent, and then progresses to wanting the whole thing into a poem of substance, but I guess that's what we all want! Brilliant free verse my friend! Great wording and expressive and image breaking, descriptive language. Well done, good entry, good luck, blessings. Roy.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thank you Roy for using the word 'brilliant' in the review!!
Comment from krys123
Teresa;
-what a wonderful idea and concept that you have written in this poem. This concept of writing a poem bit by bit and piece by piece to create an idea of the writers concepts is a wonderful approach to creating a poem by a writer.
-You had used in chosen great use of enjambment
-the imagery was expertly expressive and vividly and demonstratively descriptive throughout the writing.
-Your imagination was truly inventive and ingeniously creative throughout this poem.
-Good luck in the contest and may the good Lord be with you always Teresa.
Alex
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Teresa;
-what a wonderful idea and concept that you have written in this poem. This concept of writing a poem bit by bit and piece by piece to create an idea of the writers concepts is a wonderful approach to creating a poem by a writer.
-You had used in chosen great use of enjambment
-the imagery was expertly expressive and vividly and demonstratively descriptive throughout the writing.
-Your imagination was truly inventive and ingeniously creative throughout this poem.
-Good luck in the contest and may the good Lord be with you always Teresa.
Alex
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thank you Alex. Blessings.
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He almost kindly welcome Teresa
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi, Teresa...
_ Love your notes!
_ I promise--- I don't have any bones to pick with you---they are perfectly laid out. (*<*)
_ Great analogy of a review and how they can pick one apart, and once in awhile, not so kindly picked, plucked, and shredded.
_ Wish I had a sixer left.
_ Your visualization is excellent.
_ Super entry. Good luck in the contest.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*:*)
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Hi, Teresa...
_ Love your notes!
_ I promise--- I don't have any bones to pick with you---they are perfectly laid out. (*<*)
_ Great analogy of a review and how they can pick one apart, and once in awhile, not so kindly picked, plucked, and shredded.
_ Wish I had a sixer left.
_ Your visualization is excellent.
_ Super entry. Good luck in the contest.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*:*)
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thanks Jax! I'm so glad you got the total concept of this:)
Comment from boxergirl
This seems to be a great analogy of the writing process, Teresa, with the words personified as they describe the way they feel as the author plucks and shreds apart until it is shaped into a whole, but then the left-over words just left to wash up upon a distant shore. I like it! And I think it will be a great entry for the free verse contest. Best of luck. 8-)
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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This seems to be a great analogy of the writing process, Teresa, with the words personified as they describe the way they feel as the author plucks and shreds apart until it is shaped into a whole, but then the left-over words just left to wash up upon a distant shore. I like it! And I think it will be a great entry for the free verse contest. Best of luck. 8-)
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thank you so much Karen for the great review:)
Comment from I am Cat
I'm laid out
for all to see,
naked, vulnerable,
exposed.
I'd hoped
for nurturing
feeding, suckling
at the breast,
a bottle at best.'
(and that's the way to be in the best of poetry!)
;Instead, you pluck
at my skin, my limbs,
gashing muscle,
tendons to shreds,
exposing bones
lacerating extremities
one by one.'
(some people will do that... that's the challenge we meet when we chance to put ourselves 'out there' for the world to do that)
'Words, written
bit by bit,
pieces
created
into a whole.'
'Now, riding ocean's waves
fragmented pieces
tossed onto the shore,
like sea glass shards,'
(I love this analogy!)
;waiting
to once again
be created,
shaped and molded
into
a beautiful poem.'
(no need to wait any longer! You've done it! it's done! viola! well done!)
Good luck in the contest Teresa!
Cat
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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I'm laid out
for all to see,
naked, vulnerable,
exposed.
I'd hoped
for nurturing
feeding, suckling
at the breast,
a bottle at best.'
(and that's the way to be in the best of poetry!)
;Instead, you pluck
at my skin, my limbs,
gashing muscle,
tendons to shreds,
exposing bones
lacerating extremities
one by one.'
(some people will do that... that's the challenge we meet when we chance to put ourselves 'out there' for the world to do that)
'Words, written
bit by bit,
pieces
created
into a whole.'
'Now, riding ocean's waves
fragmented pieces
tossed onto the shore,
like sea glass shards,'
(I love this analogy!)
;waiting
to once again
be created,
shaped and molded
into
a beautiful poem.'
(no need to wait any longer! You've done it! it's done! viola! well done!)
Good luck in the contest Teresa!
Cat
Comment Written 08-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thanks so much Cat. You didn't even pluck at a single bone:)
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I'm not much of a scavenger... in spite of my name. ;)
<3
