Reviews from

O My God and Mother Nature!

Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Always!"
Appreciation of God and Mother Nature

59 total reviews 
Comment from shelley kaye
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this is more of a senryu than a haiku

anyway, it's cute

but

the "living live" part doesnt really flow well
plus
with senryu's and haiku's you shouldnt really have many repeating words
cause there''s so few words anyway

other than that, this was cute



Thanx for sharing :-)


Remember: "A first impression is a lasting impression"
(i SEE the poem BEFORE i read it)


Sea~ Shell*s Thought For Today.... Boldly Going Nowhere.





 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from sandramarie
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Wow! You've done it again. You manage to get so much meaning into so few words. Obviously, you spend some time choosing just the right words to convey your message.

Thanks for sharing.

Sandy

 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from bjivor2005
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"We feel, learn or not". Now, I know there a couple of ways to take that particular line, but I really like the idea that first sprang to mind, that being whether we do learn from what we feel, whether we earnestly or honestly try to get anything out of the world, we can't help but be cahnged/influenced by the earth that surrounds us.

 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from Riyoun
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I liked this. It was sweet and really flowed well. It is a nice, short poem. I really liked it. Keep up the good work! Have a great day.

 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from cheyennewy
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This is a lovely haiku with profound emotion and passion in so few words. No matter how old we become our mothers will remain an influence in everything we do. We may not always do what they would have us do but our mothers are always there even so. Well done...cheyenne

 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from RazberryBullet
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I like the idea, but I found this line confusing:

...Teach us living live

Maybe: Living, teach us life

...We feel, learn or not

Maybe: Learn or not, we feel.

 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from chelsmor
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You have a genuine ability to paint with your pen - another abstract to hang on my wall and study the perfectly placed words and consider how you decided on those exact brush strokes of syllables.

Again, just as your rictameter, I look at this and am amazed by the constriction of the form, yet your ability to master and move outside that box.

And what I read here, but what is not written here, is that we choose our lives,
we are given information, guidance, friendship, and we can improve, grow, learn, or simply stagnate.

Much appreciation for your work.
Chelsmor

 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from starkat
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Excellent haiku. It says so much in so few words. We are born into this world as feeling beings..crying, naked, and hungry. Then,basically, our entire lives are governed by feelings. We are in Mother Nature's hands the entire journey and are able to experience the entire gamut of feelings. What we learn or don't learn is based on feelings. We will always be the student, and Mother Nature, the grand master teacher, our entire lives. She will always teach us her way.. which is through feelings. Thanks for sharing this haiku.

 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from Diny
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Okay then! Haiku is a hard one to critque! SO short and filled with thought I believe mayve here... It was easier for me to understand reversing the words...

We feel, learn or not

like this... Learn or not, we feel!

Write on
DINY

 Comment Written 19-May-2006

Comment from sharon fallis
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Well...I minutely liked this haiku. Good word form and usage. Nice visuals and great imagery. Hard to do in an 'illusionary' world. Thanks for sharing, and keep writing. Sharon

 Comment Written 19-May-2006