A Compilation of Short stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 73 "Confinement in a Box"Expressions
25 total reviews
Comment from BethShelby
This is a sad thing to happen to a young couple. I see this is fiction but you've written in a way that makes it seem very real. This would be a very bad time to read letters from a loved one who died because someone who is bored and feeling down could make their confinement even more depressing. Nicely written.
reply by the author on 17-May-2020
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This is a sad thing to happen to a young couple. I see this is fiction but you've written in a way that makes it seem very real. This would be a very bad time to read letters from a loved one who died because someone who is bored and feeling down could make their confinement even more depressing. Nicely written.
Comment Written 14-May-2020
reply by the author on 17-May-2020
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Thank you so much, Beth. I have to confess that this is real. I know I posted it as fiction. I did that on purpose. I've led a very happy life, but I will never forget the short time we had together. Thanks so much again. Ulla:)))
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I sort of thought it might be real. I'm sure the memories are bittersweet.
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They are. So manyy ears now. Sigh ...
Comment from Drew Delaney
Your story is heart breaking! I hope it is not biographical!
A few things I noted ...
and I was twentyy three (typo)
In the following sentences, I would like you to pay attention to the lines beginning with (I). You might want to reorganize some lines.
I turned around and reached out for the top box. I brushed away the dust and made my way downstairs, the box tucked under one arm.
I entered the kitchen and sat the box down on one of the chairs. First, I would make myself a cup of coffee, and a few minutes later, I sat down with my mug of hot brew. I glanced at the box sitting on the chair next to me and, after a few moments of savouring my coffee, I decided to have a look.
Keep up the great work. You got me with the cancer and him dying in a week. The letters and the love behind it all.
Well done!
Drew xx
reply by the author on 14-May-2020
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Your story is heart breaking! I hope it is not biographical!
A few things I noted ...
and I was twentyy three (typo)
In the following sentences, I would like you to pay attention to the lines beginning with (I). You might want to reorganize some lines.
I turned around and reached out for the top box. I brushed away the dust and made my way downstairs, the box tucked under one arm.
I entered the kitchen and sat the box down on one of the chairs. First, I would make myself a cup of coffee, and a few minutes later, I sat down with my mug of hot brew. I glanced at the box sitting on the chair next to me and, after a few moments of savouring my coffee, I decided to have a look.
Keep up the great work. You got me with the cancer and him dying in a week. The letters and the love behind it all.
Well done!
Drew xx
Comment Written 14-May-2020
reply by the author on 14-May-2020
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Hi Drew, it is actually biographical. I've just put our story it in this setting. I still have all his letters. Some of them are many pages long. And Antonio died from stomach cancer. It was tragic. I've never really talked about it. But here it is. I'll go over the story and make the edits.Thanks for pointing it out. Warm regards. Ulla xx
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Oh, my! That must have been a horrible nightmare! Your writing made me think it was biographical because I sensed pain within! So sorry you had to go through that. Wish I could give you a hug! Know I care!
Drew xx
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Thanks Drew, and a hug back to you. This situation makes me think of so many things. To be honest, I hadn't thought about him for a very long time, years even, and suddenly, there he was. It was hard at the time. xxx
Comment from royowen
This is A most imaginative Story Ulla, I've decided I'm not very good at fiction, but I've realised, even if one writes a biography, one still needs to be able to fill in predictable fiction to make it work. Beautifully and sensitively written, and I think there are a lot of stories framed within a pandemic coming up, well done Ulla, good writing. Blessings Roy
Typo : He was thirty two and I was twenty(y) three...
reply by the author on 17-May-2020
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This is A most imaginative Story Ulla, I've decided I'm not very good at fiction, but I've realised, even if one writes a biography, one still needs to be able to fill in predictable fiction to make it work. Beautifully and sensitively written, and I think there are a lot of stories framed within a pandemic coming up, well done Ulla, good writing. Blessings Roy
Typo : He was thirty two and I was twenty(y) three...
Comment Written 14-May-2020
reply by the author on 17-May-2020
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Thanks a lot, Roy. This is a true story although I posted it under fiction. I was devastated when Antonio died. Even after all these years and a happy life, I still can't re-read his letters. All best. Ulla:)))
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It?s a great story, but tragic
Comment from Shirley McLain
You saved all the heartbreak until the end. I liked your story and I did not see a thing wrong. You did a great job. Take care and have a great evening. Shirley
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reply by the author on 17-May-2020
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You saved all the heartbreak until the end. I liked your story and I did not see a thing wrong. You did a great job. Take care and have a great evening. Shirley
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-May-2020
reply by the author on 17-May-2020
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Thanks a lot, Shirley. I'm so glad you liked it. I so appreciate it. Warm regards. Ulla:)))
Comment from Ben Colder
Need a six for this one. Good one Ulla. I see nothing wrong and it held my attention all the way. WOW! Thanks for sharing your write and I hope you do well in the challenge.
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reply by the author on 17-May-2020
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Need a six for this one. Good one Ulla. I see nothing wrong and it held my attention all the way. WOW! Thanks for sharing your write and I hope you do well in the challenge.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-May-2020
reply by the author on 17-May-2020
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Thank you so much, Ben. I'm so glad you liked it. Ulla:)))
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You have a great talent. I enjoy reading your work.
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Awe, Thanks!!!
