The Dance
He took my hand and we began70 total reviews
Comment from jyshaffer
This was really sweet and I like how you draw a parallel between a dance and a marriage. The words are heartfelt and I like the simplicity of emotions conveyed. The rhyming also sounds natural with your choice of words.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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This was really sweet and I like how you draw a parallel between a dance and a marriage. The words are heartfelt and I like the simplicity of emotions conveyed. The rhyming also sounds natural with your choice of words.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Thank you for your generous and encouraging review. I greatly appreciate your comments and those sparkling stars.
Blessings
Janet
Comment from Thal1959
A very nicely written sonnet. But it really doesn't matter if your husband cannot dance in the traditional sense. Every person, in a way, dances through life - either alone or with a partner.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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A very nicely written sonnet. But it really doesn't matter if your husband cannot dance in the traditional sense. Every person, in a way, dances through life - either alone or with a partner.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Thank you for your thoughtful and encouraging review. I greatly appreciate your comments.
Blessings
Janet
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You're welcome, Janet.
Comment from JDRBAR
This was an adorable read. I was expecting it to go on but it suddenly ended. LOL Very nice job of describing premarital jitters. May every new marriage dance their way through life.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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This was an adorable read. I was expecting it to go on but it suddenly ended. LOL Very nice job of describing premarital jitters. May every new marriage dance their way through life.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Thank you for your thoughtful and encouraging review. I greatly appreciate your comments.
Blessings
Janet
Comment from dragonpoet
This Shakespearean sonnet works well as a metaphor the the beginning and growth of any relationship that ended in a lasting marriage.
I wish this could be true for me. Like your husband, mine doesn't dance either.
Good luck and keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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This Shakespearean sonnet works well as a metaphor the the beginning and growth of any relationship that ended in a lasting marriage.
I wish this could be true for me. Like your husband, mine doesn't dance either.
Good luck and keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Thank you for your thoughtful and encouraging review. I greatly appreciate your comments.
Blessings
Janet
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You are very welcome.
dragonpoet
Comment from Mitchell Brontė
You have painted a delightful picture of this lovely moment of dance.
Like the dance your words flow effortlessly with the last two lines absolutely wonderful.
Have a lovely evening
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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You have painted a delightful picture of this lovely moment of dance.
Like the dance your words flow effortlessly with the last two lines absolutely wonderful.
Have a lovely evening
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Thank you for your thoughtful and encouraging review. I greatly appreciate your comments.
Blessings
Janet
Comment from RGstar
Janet, I am sure this is a sonnet. I haven't checked all lines but the ones I did allowed.
So nice for the time and moment. Anything with love and dance is right up my street, and fantasy or reality, this has a bit of both.
I have only five dear author would like to have given more for this is , I think a sonnet.
A lovely personal feel.
My best wishes.
RG
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2017
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Janet, I am sure this is a sonnet. I haven't checked all lines but the ones I did allowed.
So nice for the time and moment. Anything with love and dance is right up my street, and fantasy or reality, this has a bit of both.
I have only five dear author would like to have given more for this is , I think a sonnet.
A lovely personal feel.
My best wishes.
RG
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2017
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Thank you RG for your thoughtful and encouraging review.' I appreciate your comments and the virtual six stars. I'm just happy that you liked this piece.
Janet
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written love poem. The memories of romantic dance with your lover never fades. If you are lucky enough to be married for years the memory became a reality.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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A very well-written love poem. The memories of romantic dance with your lover never fades. If you are lucky enough to be married for years the memory became a reality.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Thank you Sandra for your thoughtful and encouraging review. I greatly appreciate your comments.
Blessings
Janet
Comment from June Sargent
Well, I can certainly understand the metaphor aspect - my husband of 48 years does not dance. I do - by myself. But this poem is more about the dance of life shared by two people who mesh. Time only enhances. Thanks for sharing its beauty.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Well, I can certainly understand the metaphor aspect - my husband of 48 years does not dance. I do - by myself. But this poem is more about the dance of life shared by two people who mesh. Time only enhances. Thanks for sharing its beauty.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Thank you June for your thoughtful and encouraging review. I greatly appreciate your comments.
Blessings
Janet
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Janet, Your first line is only 8 syllables and the rest of the poem is 10. An easy fix.[Seems oh so long ago and [very] far away.I know you didn't realize that. It is so hard to find our mistakes. The sonnet is well done except for that and a good entry. Great presentation. Good Luck! Nancy
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2017
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Janet, Your first line is only 8 syllables and the rest of the poem is 10. An easy fix.[Seems oh so long ago and [very] far away.I know you didn't realize that. It is so hard to find our mistakes. The sonnet is well done except for that and a good entry. Great presentation. Good Luck! Nancy
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2017
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Thank you Nancy for your thoughtful and encouraging review.' I appreciate your comments and your thoughtful suggestions.
Nice to have people who are encouraging and helpful at the same time.
Blessings
Janet
Comment from nancyrabbrose
Yes, I think you chose a great metaphor for the "dance" of your relationship. And, happily to note, the dance in ongoing. Well done. I would recommend your love poem to anyone.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Yes, I think you chose a great metaphor for the "dance" of your relationship. And, happily to note, the dance in ongoing. Well done. I would recommend your love poem to anyone.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2017
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Thank you Nancy for your thoughtful and encouraging review. I greatly appreciate your comments.
Blessings
Janet
