Toy Soldiers
A Minute poem for the contest30 total reviews
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
As innocent children we learn to make war with toy soldiers. My 5 nephews my 2 nieces and I were always playing Cowboy and Crooks. Needless to say the boys were destined to be the cowboys and us girls were the crooks, chased and rundown by the boys until the 'crooks' were safely locked up in jail. Lol.
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2016
As innocent children we learn to make war with toy soldiers. My 5 nephews my 2 nieces and I were always playing Cowboy and Crooks. Needless to say the boys were destined to be the cowboys and us girls were the crooks, chased and rundown by the boys until the 'crooks' were safely locked up in jail. Lol.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2016
-
Thanks, Sandra. There seems to be an inbuilt violence gene. When there are not toy soldiers at hand, any stick will do to make a gun or sword. Nonetheless, I sometimes think we feed and encourage it unduly.
Comment from kiwijenny
I am out of sixes but I wonder too.
Such technology for destruction in World War One but little in the realm of healing
God bless
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
I am out of sixes but I wonder too.
Such technology for destruction in World War One but little in the realm of healing
God bless
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
Good to hear from you, Jenny. I am miles behind with my reviewing at the moment, for which I apologise. Best wishes, Tony
-
Me too. I have been gone for a time so I could concentrate on writing children's stories. I find Fanstory distracts me from my purpose of writing even though it is a writing site. Lol
Comment from Pantygynt
Toy soldiers these days are like their counterparts in real life so drab. All this camouflage and khaki. It's almost as if the didn't want to stand in hollow square in bright red tunics, charged at by Napoleons Old Grumblers or gaily charging up a Crimean valley for the Russian guns, polices flying out behind them - fancy going to way with your flipping jacket half on and half off.
That's what I call toy soldiers. These days the best way to play toy soldiers is to go stalking through the woods yourself. And use your imagination.
Either way it's all practice for the real thing. Do you think there is a chance that the will ever be a generation that doesn't in however small way experience the real thing. 95% bore dome and 5% sheer terror?
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
Toy soldiers these days are like their counterparts in real life so drab. All this camouflage and khaki. It's almost as if the didn't want to stand in hollow square in bright red tunics, charged at by Napoleons Old Grumblers or gaily charging up a Crimean valley for the Russian guns, polices flying out behind them - fancy going to way with your flipping jacket half on and half off.
That's what I call toy soldiers. These days the best way to play toy soldiers is to go stalking through the woods yourself. And use your imagination.
Either way it's all practice for the real thing. Do you think there is a chance that the will ever be a generation that doesn't in however small way experience the real thing. 95% bore dome and 5% sheer terror?
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
I must say that the splendid leaden soldiers of the past were far more appealing than the plastic ones in my picture. The fact that they were somewhat poisonous gave a sharpness to the playthings of our youth. I can remember having a little tin of mercury at school when I was about ten. There was a groove in the front of my desk, alongside the inkwell, that held the pen and, more often than not, my beads of mercury. Hours of fun rolling them around, re-collecting the drops and generally being fascinated. I seem to have survived that, too - the only deficiency caused being in my knowledge of the Ancient Britons and their relationship with the marauding Romans. i must have known that Google was coming one day!
-
You haven't stopped at mixed metaphors you've completely mixed up history. Lol. Yes thos were the days before health and safety got into bed together. I can remember the attraction of mercury too although I don't think I ever actually possessed any. Those lead soldiers were all right as long as you didn't put them in your mouth.
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Good poem and presentation.
-Thanks for sharing the author notes.
-It must have been tough for your father in many ways-- watching you play toy soldiers, and also thinking of his own situation in a real war.
-The first stanza, especially the first line is very poignant.
-Very good conclusion.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-Good poem and presentation.
-Thanks for sharing the author notes.
-It must have been tough for your father in many ways-- watching you play toy soldiers, and also thinking of his own situation in a real war.
-The first stanza, especially the first line is very poignant.
-Very good conclusion.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
Thanks for this, Pam. My father never talked about his experiences in WW1. My poem is only a conjecture about the way he might have felt. Thank you for your empathy. Best wishes, Tony
-
You are very welcome. I don't think many fathers talk to their children about war or military experiences. Good job of describing what he might have thought.
Comment from dmt1967
War is hard to watch when you have been in it and seen the devastation it can do. I liked the poem and think your father was grateful his son lived in a time when war was only a game. Good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
War is hard to watch when you have been in it and seen the devastation it can do. I liked the poem and think your father was grateful his son lived in a time when war was only a game. Good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
Thanks for this, DMT. My father never talked about his experiences in WW1. My poem is only a conjecture about the way he might have felt. Thank you for your empathy. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from MacMhuirich
We were so innocent in those days, if we knew then what we know now we would have thought twice of many things we did as children. A wonderful write for the contest. Best wishes for the contest.
Bless you
John
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
We were so innocent in those days, if we knew then what we know now we would have thought twice of many things we did as children. A wonderful write for the contest. Best wishes for the contest.
Bless you
John
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
Thanks for this, John. My father never talked about his experiences in WW1. My poem is only a conjecture about the way he might have felt. Thank you for your empathy. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Domino 2
Thanks for the memories, Tony. I played with my tin soldiers, and a fort, and cannons that fired matchsticks, for ages. Now, I'm completely anti-war, unless an imminent and direct threat to my homeland. I wonder what happened to all those toys.
I've always preferred starting lines in lower case if they don't continue sentences from the previous line, as I think that adds flow and enjambment, but I appreciate some still prefer the traditional presentation, as here.
I'm wondering who the 'he' is, though maybe I'm being dim. No matter, a little mystery is good.
Very enjoyable read.
Best wishes, Ray.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
Thanks for the memories, Tony. I played with my tin soldiers, and a fort, and cannons that fired matchsticks, for ages. Now, I'm completely anti-war, unless an imminent and direct threat to my homeland. I wonder what happened to all those toys.
I've always preferred starting lines in lower case if they don't continue sentences from the previous line, as I think that adds flow and enjambment, but I appreciate some still prefer the traditional presentation, as here.
I'm wondering who the 'he' is, though maybe I'm being dim. No matter, a little mystery is good.
Very enjoyable read.
Best wishes, Ray.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
Hi Ray. Yes, I had a small howitzer that fired matchsticks, too. I imagine that some of these old toys would be worth a bit now - though mine, too, disappeared long ago.The 'he' in my poem was deliberately ambiguous - along the lines of the unknown soldier, although i had my own father in mind, who fought in the trenches in WW1
-
Thanks for your interesting and explanatory reply, Tony.
I suspect the tooth fairies stole all our old toys...OR it could have been Santa, who recycled them - the mean old so n so. ;-)
Cheers, Ray
Comment from Sambangi
Hi,
This is a very well written minute poem with beautiful end rhymes. I know it is quite tough to have rhymes for lines as short as four syllables, but you did pretty well. Also this subject is quite interesting in minute format. Wish you all the best
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
Hi,
This is a very well written minute poem with beautiful end rhymes. I know it is quite tough to have rhymes for lines as short as four syllables, but you did pretty well. Also this subject is quite interesting in minute format. Wish you all the best
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
Thanks, Sambangi. I appreciate your review. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from William Ross
very good I use to have and play with hundreds of these and have my own little wars. great job on this and good luck brought back memories. have a great day.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
very good I use to have and play with hundreds of these and have my own little wars. great job on this and good luck brought back memories. have a great day.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
Hi William. I had a small howitzer that fired matchsticks to knock down the ranks of soldiers. I imagine that some of these old toys would be worth a bit now - though mine disappeared long ago. Thanks for the review. Tony
Comment from rama devi
Excellent contemplative minute poem, my friend. True to form and finely presented. I was a tomboy, but never liked playing with soldiers. Guess my brother's didn't either, or my parents never bought them. We liked Legos! :)
Good flow and rhyming, and poetic devices, too, like assonance of I in line one and cosnoancne of L in line three
and alliteration of S and D in the third stanza.
Good luck.
Warm Smiles, rd
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
Excellent contemplative minute poem, my friend. True to form and finely presented. I was a tomboy, but never liked playing with soldiers. Guess my brother's didn't either, or my parents never bought them. We liked Legos! :)
Good flow and rhyming, and poetic devices, too, like assonance of I in line one and cosnoancne of L in line three
and alliteration of S and D in the third stanza.
Good luck.
Warm Smiles, rd
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2016
-
Thanks, RD. I don' think Lego as around when I was a kid. I remember having a Meccano set though. I think just about every boy in England had one of those in the 1950s! Smiles! Tony
-
:-))) Never heard of Meccano! Smiles! rd