I Wandered the Desert
rhyming quatrains in 6/5/6/5140 total reviews
Comment from jason381202
This is very well done. It has a good rhythm and. An easy flow. Very sad in its subject matter a+. I hope to read more of what you have to offer. Thank you for sharing this.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
This is very well done. It has a good rhythm and. An easy flow. Very sad in its subject matter a+. I hope to read more of what you have to offer. Thank you for sharing this.
Comment Written 23-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Jason, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from RGstar
I loved the first three stanzas, beautiful.
A recognition of expectancy, yet, we seem to expect so much without taking the time to nurture that expectancy in order for it to bear fruit.
Well said, and well defined.
I thought the last stanza questioned fate, rather than enhanced it, yet, that may be the meaning.
Well written,
best wishes,
RGstar
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
I loved the first three stanzas, beautiful.
A recognition of expectancy, yet, we seem to expect so much without taking the time to nurture that expectancy in order for it to bear fruit.
Well said, and well defined.
I thought the last stanza questioned fate, rather than enhanced it, yet, that may be the meaning.
Well written,
best wishes,
RGstar
Comment Written 23-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Thank you, RG, for your generous review. The final stanza is meant to point out that if a person wants something, he or she should do something about it and not just expect to ask God for it like a child asks Santa. If you want a garden, you really ought to scatter some seeds :-) Brooke
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi Brooke
I really like this all the way through, but that last stanza is absolutely wonderful! Reminds me of Garth Brooks song, 'Unanswered Prayers'.
Wonderful read.
Cheers
Keep Smilin'... Jax
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
Hi Brooke
I really like this all the way through, but that last stanza is absolutely wonderful! Reminds me of Garth Brooks song, 'Unanswered Prayers'.
Wonderful read.
Cheers
Keep Smilin'... Jax
Comment Written 23-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Jax, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Willowsong
An excellent portrayal of faith. This had a lovely rhyme scheme and flowed nicely. Great color choice, like walking through the desert and a truly stunning piece of artwork to compliment.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
An excellent portrayal of faith. This had a lovely rhyme scheme and flowed nicely. Great color choice, like walking through the desert and a truly stunning piece of artwork to compliment.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Willowsong, thank you so much :-) Brooke
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You're most welcome :-)
Comment from Lothlorien
This is a great poem. It is really expressive, and it drags the reader in to what the speaker is feeling. I am really glad I read it.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
This is a great poem. It is really expressive, and it drags the reader in to what the speaker is feeling. I am really glad I read it.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you so much, Lothlorien :-) Brooke
Comment from Tonulak
Dear Brooke,
A tale of questing, or fighting for survival. Perhaps faith is the recognition that we have all the tools...Very thought-provoking write--Ted
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
Dear Brooke,
A tale of questing, or fighting for survival. Perhaps faith is the recognition that we have all the tools...Very thought-provoking write--Ted
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Ted, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from mermaids
This poem could be a song, I can hear the words to music. Love the constant trying to acheive something that doesn't not come through. There is definately a spiritual feel to your words.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
This poem could be a song, I can hear the words to music. Love the constant trying to acheive something that doesn't not come through. There is definately a spiritual feel to your words.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Elaine, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, Brooke :-)
I really like "I Wandered the Desert). Besides having your trademarks of exceptional meter and rhyme it carries a message that a lot of folks who think that all they have to do to accomplish good is to pray and rely on God ought to take to heart. It has great flow and figurative language and imagery. (valley to search for the sky)
Preston
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
Hi, Brooke :-)
I really like "I Wandered the Desert). Besides having your trademarks of exceptional meter and rhyme it carries a message that a lot of folks who think that all they have to do to accomplish good is to pray and rely on God ought to take to heart. It has great flow and figurative language and imagery. (valley to search for the sky)
Preston
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thank you so much, Preston, for your insightful response to this poem. I appreciate your generous six stars and your thoughtfulness :-) Brooke
Comment from ragamuffin
An excellent and artistic thought provoking piece. It makes one think about what might be needed "more than a prayer." I suppose that would differ from person to person. The piece creates a feel of a journey that's not over yet.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
An excellent and artistic thought provoking piece. It makes one think about what might be needed "more than a prayer." I suppose that would differ from person to person. The piece creates a feel of a journey that's not over yet.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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Thanks so much, ragamuffin - specifically I meant the speaker needed more action and less asking - if you want a garden, you really need to plant some seeds :-) Brooke
Comment from AprilShower
Interesting poem, Brooke. It seemed nothing worked out right. It all happened because this person just didn't do all that he or she needed to do to get good results. Well done.
April
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
Interesting poem, Brooke. It seemed nothing worked out right. It all happened because this person just didn't do all that he or she needed to do to get good results. Well done.
April
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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April, thank you so much :-) Brooke