Savannah Love
Viewing comments for Chapter 65 "CHAPTER 14: PART TWO"Can a fallen confederate soldier encourage love?
70 total reviews
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Dear Barbara, A great progression here for your story. I did have a few laughs over the woman taking so much ...and the kitchen sink comment. Light and fun post for this story - and I'm sure Cash will be looking in the rear view mirror a lot.
Great overall job my friend.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
Edit check:
"We need (a) copies of their drivers' licenses. They'll drive, right?" // Remove 'a'
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Dear Barbara, A great progression here for your story. I did have a few laughs over the woman taking so much ...and the kitchen sink comment. Light and fun post for this story - and I'm sure Cash will be looking in the rear view mirror a lot.
Great overall job my friend.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
Edit check:
"We need (a) copies of their drivers' licenses. They'll drive, right?" // Remove 'a'
Comment Written 15-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thank you for the catch. I appreciate the help. I had made a change and left a word in.
Comment from ElegantButler
There was wonderful dialogue in this chapter. It felt natural and I could feel everyone's excitement for the upcoming game. Hope they don't leave too early. People around here learned the horrible results of such a thing recently.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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There was wonderful dialogue in this chapter. It felt natural and I could feel everyone's excitement for the upcoming game. Hope they don't leave too early. People around here learned the horrible results of such a thing recently.
Comment Written 15-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Your characters are so believable that I wait line by line for what they are going to say or do next. Some of your word choices hit me right down home. Great job!
Thanks for another great read!
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Your characters are so believable that I wait line by line for what they are going to say or do next. Some of your word choices hit me right down home. Great job!
Thanks for another great read!
Comment Written 15-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
At least they're going prepared and the girls are dressed
for the part.. And now, at last, they're off
We need [a] copies of their drivers' licenses. - lose "a"
Fowler needs to make a copy of (both) your drivers' license." - I'd be inclined to add "both" here
his back jeans pocket.
his jeans back pocket
Margaret
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
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At least they're going prepared and the girls are dressed
for the part.. And now, at last, they're off
We need [a] copies of their drivers' licenses. - lose "a"
Fowler needs to make a copy of (both) your drivers' license." - I'd be inclined to add "both" here
his back jeans pocket.
his jeans back pocket
Margaret
Comment Written 15-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
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Thank you for the kind review and dropping by.
Comment from Writingfundimension
The gang seems to ready for anything at this point. Nice balance of building excitement and tension about the outcome of the plan, Barbara. It's especially obvious here that Paige comes from money unlike her friends. Looking forward to what's to come!
Warmest regards, Bev
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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The gang seems to ready for anything at this point. Nice balance of building excitement and tension about the outcome of the plan, Barbara. It's especially obvious here that Paige comes from money unlike her friends. Looking forward to what's to come!
Warmest regards, Bev
Comment Written 15-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thank you for the kind review and dropping by.
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You're most welcome, barbara. :0) Bev
Comment from christopherjl
I am revising my rating because I feel without the context of the other pieces the four stars was unfair. I appreciate your vulnerability in putting so much writing on the site. Something I only aspire to do.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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I am revising my rating because I feel without the context of the other pieces the four stars was unfair. I appreciate your vulnerability in putting so much writing on the site. Something I only aspire to do.
Comment Written 15-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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If you'd read the previous post those statements would make sense. Thank you
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
A well-written chapter. Your writing is clear and easy to read as always. Good suspense makes the reader want to read more. Have a good week~Debbie
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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A well-written chapter. Your writing is clear and easy to read as always. Good suspense makes the reader want to read more. Have a good week~Debbie
Comment Written 15-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thank you for the kind review and dropping by.
Comment from unimatrix001
It seems like Paige got out of her cast awfully fast. I'm sure how long she had the cast, but it seemed like days, maybe a week.
Driver's License is a single object as you have used it, therefore the plural is Driver's Licenses. You used it twice in chapter, both are incorrect.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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It seems like Paige got out of her cast awfully fast. I'm sure how long she had the cast, but it seemed like days, maybe a week.
Driver's License is a single object as you have used it, therefore the plural is Driver's Licenses. You used it twice in chapter, both are incorrect.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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I thought I made that correction. I will recheck. Thank you for the review.
Comment from Mishelly
I love how naive Paige was about what she wearing. She really doesn't seem to realize the effect she has on Cash or any other man. That's really sweet.
I found one mistake in the sentence: We need a copies of their drivers' licenses. (You just need to take out the "a".)
I can't wait to find out if their plan works, and they finally capture the culprit :-)
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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I love how naive Paige was about what she wearing. She really doesn't seem to realize the effect she has on Cash or any other man. That's really sweet.
I found one mistake in the sentence: We need a copies of their drivers' licenses. (You just need to take out the "a".)
I can't wait to find out if their plan works, and they finally capture the culprit :-)
Comment Written 14-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thank you for the kind review and dropping by.
Comment from Darkhorse555
spitting out beautiful words like raindrops from the clouds as they look down on your beautifully penned piece dear friend i enjoyed the read
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2013
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spitting out beautiful words like raindrops from the clouds as they look down on your beautifully penned piece dear friend i enjoyed the read
Comment Written 14-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2013
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Thank your the kind review.
