Reviews from

Anger/hate

Senryu about feeling ; 5-7-5

29 total reviews 
Comment from Joan E.
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

That's two posts today--your muse is in overdrive! I admired your good advice. (I think it might be better to keep the verbs together and move "sometimes" to follow "Anger".) Best wishes in the 5-7-5 contest. -Joan

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks for review and tip
Comment from Jewell McChesney
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your senryu has a valid point. I feel the word choices could be better but your concept is good.

The intro line, " for us as humans"
is unnecessary.
Suggestion:

Do not be hateful
Anger like a harmful drug
Has painful chain reaction

Good luck ...


This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks for review and sorry-am only a stupid Dutchie
Comment from Dutchie
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Very clever this poem. Sometimes you don't need words to hurt somebody. The attitude will cause sometimes a discharge.
That's why the artwork is chosen so well. Great. Liefs Fia

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks so much again Fia;actually you also get rhyming dictionaries on internet.
    Liefs,
    Ine
reply by Dutchie on 06-Aug-2011
    You're welcome. For rhyming words I use rhymezone on the internet.Liefs
    Fia
Comment from fireflylil
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Very nicely done, great picture! This is so true. Hate hurts mostly ones self. It will destroy you from the inside. Anger has other releases. Good job!

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks for your generous review firefly
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is an interesting poem on a worthy topic. It meets the criteria of this contest as to form and syllable count. Best regards, Jeanie Mercer

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks Jeanie;counted them myself as well-LOL.
    Growing somewhat wiser.
Comment from jaded831
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Very profound, your poem reads well. People lash out in anger and the other person may never forgive. In reality they only hurt themselves by not forgiving.

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks for generous review;did not like it so much after I finished.
Comment from peggles
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A perfect sentiment
Good use of phrasing used
A strong message given in a tiny amount of words
Very well done
Best wishes for the contest
I am surely will do well

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks so much Peggles;did you really mean that as I started doubting it more then a bit.
    But it was entered.
reply by peggles on 06-Aug-2011
    Of course I meant it I thought this was a first class piece of work you have talent
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks,my confidence was down for sure
Comment from Denise S
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A well needed message sent here. I really liked it a lot. We should not allow the sun to go down on our anger that is so true. Really nice.

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks for your review Denise.
Comment from barfy
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Never truer words were ever spoken...

A very handsome composition. Technically perfect.

I wish you well with this work.

Thank you

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2011


reply by the author on 06-Aug-2011
    Thanks for review.