Caterpillar sleeps
5-7-5 contest entry29 total reviews
Comment from Ogden
The adult does have the survival advantage, especially when the kids are caterpillars, if I get your drift.
Good luck in the 5-7-5 poetry contest!
:o)
Ogden (Don)
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
The adult does have the survival advantage, especially when the kids are caterpillars, if I get your drift.
Good luck in the 5-7-5 poetry contest!
:o)
Ogden (Don)
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Absolutely, thank you for the awesome review Ogden.
God bless
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You're very welcome!
Don
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
I like this. I imagine many things could happen before and during this transformation. Something could eat it, or, something could go wrong during the transformation. I like this well thought out and well written work. Well done!
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
I like this. I imagine many things could happen before and during this transformation. Something could eat it, or, something could go wrong during the transformation. I like this well thought out and well written work. Well done!
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Thank you Jeffrey, I enjoy these little pieces.
God bless
Comment from C. Gale Burnett
Exquisite, and I don't have any six's left :(
I love this because, even though you are writing about butterflies and caterpillars, I can relate your words to life within the human realm.
Perfectly chosen artwork and love your color scheme.
An exceptional contest entry! Best wishes!
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
Exquisite, and I don't have any six's left :(
I love this because, even though you are writing about butterflies and caterpillars, I can relate your words to life within the human realm.
Perfectly chosen artwork and love your color scheme.
An exceptional contest entry! Best wishes!
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Thank you, Gale, for this amazing review.
God bless
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written 5-7-5 poem about the caterpillar that takes a long sleep and transforms into a beautiful butterfly that seems to fulfill his dreams.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
A very well-written 5-7-5 poem about the caterpillar that takes a long sleep and transforms into a beautiful butterfly that seems to fulfill his dreams.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Sandra, thank you for the awesome review.
God bless
Comment from john mallahan
So true, right? Can only see all those chyrisallis, chrisally? SP anyway, am sure--maybe will get a spell check, who knows. Luck to all! Getting through the poetic submission!
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
So true, right? Can only see all those chyrisallis, chrisally? SP anyway, am sure--maybe will get a spell check, who knows. Luck to all! Getting through the poetic submission!
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Thank you, John.
God bless
Comment from Rachelle Allen
I love it when a writer can present something common and give it such a new slant. This is really imaginative (who thinks about a caterpillar's dreams, after all..) and thought-provoking. Plus you chose really good artwork to complement your work. GREAT entry, Mystery Poet! xo
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
I love it when a writer can present something common and give it such a new slant. This is really imaginative (who thinks about a caterpillar's dreams, after all..) and thought-provoking. Plus you chose really good artwork to complement your work. GREAT entry, Mystery Poet! xo
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Thank you for the awesome review, Rachelle.
God bless
Comment from Sylvia Page
butterfly survives - yes it does survive from extinction battling the toxic environment, then goes through a tedious transformation while the caterpillar dreams!
Loved your imagery in this 5-7-5
Best wishes
Sylvia
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
butterfly survives - yes it does survive from extinction battling the toxic environment, then goes through a tedious transformation while the caterpillar dreams!
Loved your imagery in this 5-7-5
Best wishes
Sylvia
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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So true. Thank you for this awesome review.
God bless
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I enjoyed reviewing
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
This meets the contest requirements nicely with three lines of a short-long-short format and a 5-7-5 syllable count. Lines 1 and 2 interconnect smoothly and provide the reader of a concrete image. The touch of alliteration adds flavor to the piece. A seasonal reference can be easily implied by the timing of when a caterpillar goes into cocoon mode. Good luck in the voting and thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
This meets the contest requirements nicely with three lines of a short-long-short format and a 5-7-5 syllable count. Lines 1 and 2 interconnect smoothly and provide the reader of a concrete image. The touch of alliteration adds flavor to the piece. A seasonal reference can be easily implied by the timing of when a caterpillar goes into cocoon mode. Good luck in the voting and thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2019
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Thank you for this inspiring review, Mystic. I do love to craft these little guys.
God bless
Comment from Gail Denham
nice going - what a great picture someone has created of the caterpillar to the butterfly - God created some amazing creatures - this is one of them. I like the line "and the caterpillar dreams" - hmmm I wonder if he/she knows what they will be in the end. or if they have intuition.?
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2019
nice going - what a great picture someone has created of the caterpillar to the butterfly - God created some amazing creatures - this is one of them. I like the line "and the caterpillar dreams" - hmmm I wonder if he/she knows what they will be in the end. or if they have intuition.?
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2019
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You pose a great question. Now I wonder the same thing lol. Thank you for the awesome review.
God bless
Comment from the13thpoet
I liked your poem, it is a good entry for the contest, I wish you luck. That being said, can I offer my opinion? I think it will tell the story a little better if it were
caterpillar dreams
tedious transformation
butterfly is born
just my opinion, and not a criticism..... good job
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2019
I liked your poem, it is a good entry for the contest, I wish you luck. That being said, can I offer my opinion? I think it will tell the story a little better if it were
caterpillar dreams
tedious transformation
butterfly is born
just my opinion, and not a criticism..... good job
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2019
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Thank for the review. The committee is already reviewing. I like your suggestion, not sure if we're allowed to change at this time.
God bless.