A Happy Ending.
When things are bad, a wonderful life can begin.15 total reviews
Comment from Miranda Langston
awwwwwww <3 this is such a touching story and it's so well written, too, if i might add. this is a fantastic piece of writing and it could totally win a contest :)
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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awwwwwww <3 this is such a touching story and it's so well written, too, if i might add. this is a fantastic piece of writing and it could totally win a contest :)
Comment Written 17-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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Thank you for reading, reviewing and your kind comments.
Comment from Sally Law
I apologize that I do not have a six for this excellent writing. This is such a sweet story of love, family and hard work. Something our world needs more of. Thank you for sharing this from the deepest parts of your heart. I was sorry to see this was not in a contest because I think it could win!
All my best to you and yours,
Sally
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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I apologize that I do not have a six for this excellent writing. This is such a sweet story of love, family and hard work. Something our world needs more of. Thank you for sharing this from the deepest parts of your heart. I was sorry to see this was not in a contest because I think it could win!
All my best to you and yours,
Sally
Comment Written 17-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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Thank you Sally for reading, reviewing and your kind comments, I will confess that I had originally thought to enter it in a contest, but it was too long.
Comment from heart of Lou
Lovely story, obviously from the past, with the butcher shop, and the little boy taking home the 'scrap' parts of the chicken so he and his mother would have nourishing food.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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Lovely story, obviously from the past, with the butcher shop, and the little boy taking home the 'scrap' parts of the chicken so he and his mother would have nourishing food.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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Thank you for reading, reviewing, your kind comments and keen observations.
Comment from giraffmang
hi there,
I liked this piece. It is generally well written and story is a pleasing and satisfying one.
few bits I noted as I read through-
His father, Phil had been a hard worker - insert a comma following Phil.
chicken hearts, livers etc or from the bones - this is just purely a personal preference thing, but I always think 'and so on' or 'and suchlike' looks a lot better than 'etc'.
that Mr. Harding had ask him the day before - asked.
Or that you mum didn't have to work - your.
How would you like to help out in both shops after school and on Saturday - this should probably have a question mark.
"How about I give you a hand today," William suggested, "there are three bags instead of two." - should maybe be a question mark in here too.
William step inside to answer any questions - stepped.
The three rivalry companies had provided great arguments - just rival.
All the best
G
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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hi there,
I liked this piece. It is generally well written and story is a pleasing and satisfying one.
few bits I noted as I read through-
His father, Phil had been a hard worker - insert a comma following Phil.
chicken hearts, livers etc or from the bones - this is just purely a personal preference thing, but I always think 'and so on' or 'and suchlike' looks a lot better than 'etc'.
that Mr. Harding had ask him the day before - asked.
Or that you mum didn't have to work - your.
How would you like to help out in both shops after school and on Saturday - this should probably have a question mark.
"How about I give you a hand today," William suggested, "there are three bags instead of two." - should maybe be a question mark in here too.
William step inside to answer any questions - stepped.
The three rivalry companies had provided great arguments - just rival.
All the best
G
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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Thank you, G, for reading, reviewing, your kind comments and keen observation, I will make those corrections in a moment.
Comment from Hugh McDowell
Well written and with great pace. I found myself drawn in from the first couple of sentences. I like the messages in the story. Hard work pays off, there are people that are willing to go above and beyond for others, the sense of community. As a 13 year practicing vegan, I wish it would have been something other than a butcher shop but doesn't affect the quality of the story. Excellent. Hugh
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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Well written and with great pace. I found myself drawn in from the first couple of sentences. I like the messages in the story. Hard work pays off, there are people that are willing to go above and beyond for others, the sense of community. As a 13 year practicing vegan, I wish it would have been something other than a butcher shop but doesn't affect the quality of the story. Excellent. Hugh
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2018
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Thank you so much for reading, reviewing and your kind comments. It was a spur of the moment writing and butcher shop just came to mind, so I do apologize for that part but I am glad you did enjoy it.
