Reviews from

Humanity Project

Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "The Mountain's Knees"
A science fiction book about genetic engineering.

29 total reviews 
Comment from emptypage
Excellent
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The best thing about this chapter is the conversation on overcoming fears. I personally needed to hear this today, and I thank you.

I hate that Ayala is afraid of what lies ahead and may miss good things because of it. I have a feeling Archie might talk her into going anyway.

And Archie's fears??? Curious ending. I'll we waiting on the next part.

Very well written, as always.

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
    Oh, Ayala will go, but she won't be happy about it. haha.

    I needed the lesson, too. I had a cancer scare, but it was found early enough to remove surgically, and no chemo or radiation. That's why I haven't been on lately. Lots of tests, but a wonderful turnout.

    Hope all is well with you!

    Yeah, Archie has his fears, but mostly the large hairy type with claws. haha.

    Take care,
    Rhonda
reply by emptypage on 25-Apr-2017
    Damn, Rhonda! A cancer scare?? Good results = great news, but I know this part of life and I know how scared you must have been. You are good now??
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2017
    I have surgery ahead of me next week, and that can't be fun, but they think they'll get it all and I won't have to have radiation or chemo. I'll tell more if you want on pm.
    Thanks
reply by emptypage on 26-Apr-2017
    i do want!

    i didn't know until today that comments are public. i've probably embarrassed every i know, lol.
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Excellent
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Good chapter. I wondered what happened to this story... glad to see it back. Sure hope they aren't captured at the mines.. will be hard to get Todd out.

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
    They'll have some challenges.
    I took a bit of time on this book to figure out the direction I wanted to go, but I've got a head of steam back on it.

    Thanks for the wonderful review,
    Rhonda
Comment from mbroyles2
Excellent
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An enjoyable chapter as Archie and the gang get closer to Mine City.
It will be interesting to see how they fare once they get there.
Great dialogue and imagery.
Looking forward to the next part.
Michael

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
    Thank you, Michael. Yeah, things are about to get a lot more intense!
    I appreciate the review,
    Rhonda
Comment from apky
Excellent
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I must say that I always come away with much from your story, Rhonda.
Even if it's fantasy and all that, you put in a lot of elements that reflect our human
society as we know it; yesterday, today and obviously an ever worsening tomorrow.
Thanks you for sharing this.
Below are some of the "wisdom" I cherished:
"Running or hiding from our fears doesn't help us overcome them, Dear."


We must overcome our weaknesses, or if we don't, we're just pawns in someone else's game. Fear allows people to control you

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2017
    Thank you for the wonderful review, apky. I appreciate you telling the lines you liked best. It helps drive the next chapter.

    Have a great week,
    Rhonda
Comment from MelB
Excellent
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Hi Rhonda, so glad to see another post on the story! The chapter and the dialogue flow well. Fear certainly does breed more fear. I like the alpha male thinking.

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2017
    Thank you, Melissa!
    I'm glad to hear from you as well. I need to look through my many messages for your book. You left us hanging on the last chapter. haha.
    Take care, my friend, and thanks for reviewing,
    Rhonda
reply by MelB on 23-Apr-2017
    I posted another chapter yesterday. Unfortunately, I leave ya hanging a little again. LOL The ending should be action packed though.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2017
    I'll get right on it, thanks!
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Excellent
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Excellently written and quite an addition to the last part. YOu are using messages to speak of life and power, peace and fear. Fear breeds fear, yes it does and it brings out the best in these few

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2017
    Thank you so much, Barb. What wonderful comments. I appreciate the time and attention to this chapter.

    Take care,
    Rhonda
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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Oh my, that's easier said than done to become the "alpha male" to a bear. Overall, an enjoyable chapter. While, I can't exactly put my finger on it, I feel like the dialog could be made more unique per character. For example, when Sani talks about prenatal care, I think it sounds more like Archie. There's a part where there's lots of talking back and forth without identifying the speaker so maybe some more action tags to accompany the dialog would help to see who said what.

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2017
    Thank you for the wonderful review. You called it right, that was supposed to be Archie's line. haha. Get caught up sometimes!!

    I tried to clean up the speaking, and am still working on it as well.

    Thanks a lot,
    Rhonda
Comment from Sankey
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Great Chapter, have missed you. An enjoyable read. I seem to remember you have had troubles.
Now Suggestions and a few spags... Suggestion to make sentence end more sense. It'll (get) dark soon, and we need to be well down the road before it does." ....obviously get dark just felt like that change of word left the ending open, better.


in the following...drought resistant bus(h)es?? what are buses... hhe I think I figured it out. presume?

shelter[ed] them while they rested.

Suggestion...always move(s) me..my comment was thinking if it was the "wonders"...then move?? Love the word plop (related to sitting)a lot of you Americans use.

to pounce on hi[s](m) at any moment.

I have 3 chapters hopefully with rewards on and hoping to get Chapter 32 up today of my biography. God Bless.


 Comment Written 23-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2017
    Thank you, dear friend. Yes, I am experiencing some health issues, but have decided that writing helps keep the worries away.
    I appreciate the six star rating, and the wonderful comments, with helpful suggestions. I'll get them fixed at once.

    Take care, my friend,
    Rhonda
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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I like Sani raising the philosophically generated fear angle, and I like the way you weave it into your stories Rhonda. Yes, you're right, we all suffer from fear, and the way to handle it is, "Be bold, be strong, for the Lord thy God is with you.! Joshua 1:9. They ate drawing near to the source of their fear, the unpredictable Unknown, but God says...well done, trust is God's banner. Well done, blessings, Roy
Suggestion : (as any physical she might have.) as any physical need she had? 2: a black bear to pounce on (his) at any moment. Him?

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2017
    Thank you, Roy!!
    Yes, you are right about fear and it's answer. As some ladies at church say, meet fear with faith.
    Thank you for reviewing and leaving such helpful comments.

    Take care, my friend!
    Rhonda
reply by royowen on 24-Apr-2017
    You too dear Rhinda
reply by royowen on 24-Apr-2017
    Er...Rhonda
Comment from Heidi M
Excellent
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Great discussion they had about fear. Who doesn't fear something? It will require bravery for them to face their fears. So glad they have Sani leading them.
drought resistant (bushes)
to (shelter) them while they rested
pounce on (him) at any moment

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2017
    Thank you, Heidi. I've made the changes, and appreciate the generous reviews. You're a sweetheart.
    Take care,
    Rhonda